To Knowingly Protect
by SRSK
Summary: Nazeka Mamori has found herself in the afterlife, with a sudden life forced upon her. But with her inept ability to fail at almost everything in the Shinigami Academy, will she ever be able to make the rank of captain? or even hear her zanpakutou's name?
1. To Knowingly Protect

I walked sullenly along the dirt road that was in between towering wooden fences that blocked off the yards of all the neighbors. The sun was shining in the cool morning sky. It was so quiet around here, in the 1st District of West Rukongai: Junrin'an. Who am I? And why, you might ask, am I here in the first place? Well, let me explain.

My name is Nazeka Mamori, and I was once a human. That's right, you heard me: once a human. I'm dead now. I died from being attacked by this huge creature that was later explained to me as a Hollow. I'm fifteen… or at least I _was_. I have medium length black hair with a great deal of side bangs to my left, hazel eyes, and I'm pretty short for my age.

After dying, I was sent through a cycle called the Dangai Precipice World, and then I ended up here in what is called the Soul Society. It's separated into two different sections called the Rukongai and the Seireitei. I arrived in the outskirts of the Seireitei, though I didn't know where I was or that I wasn't allowed in there. You see, only Shinigami are allowed inside the Seireitei. Ordinary souls aren't allowed there, and are treated like dirt.

Well, when I arrived there, I was immediately found by the Shinigami there and taken before the head council called the Gotei 13 to be trialed as either a spy or just a rule breaker (for you see, it's _extremely_ hard to get inside the Seireitei). A captain there took pity on me after I pleaded for my innocence and explained that I just ended up there. During the 'trial', they realized I had what they called 'an extremely high reiatsu'. I was then forced to enter the academy for Shinigami here, and after that, I was given a day of free time and a day to get ready for the school.

So, here I am, wandering around the Rukongai for my free day. Might as well get used to my new home, right? I continued to walk down the dirt path, bored as hell. The only noises were from up ahead. A loud girl was shouting about leaving to go to school. No doubt she would be one of my future classmates. The respondent was an impudent sounding boy, while the small voice of his grandmother was heard scolding him.

I was just passing the gate to their home when the girl who I had heard ran into me, knocking me over. I hit the ground with a _thud_, while the girl apologized quickly, "Oh! I'm so sorry! Ah, Shirou-chan! Will you apologize to her for me?" She ran off after that, wearing a white and red shihakushou—the Shinigami uniform. She had her hair in low pigtails and had a bit of a baby-ish face.

"OI! Momo! Get back here and tell her that yourself!" The boy yelled, coming to the gate and watching as she ran off. He had spiky white hair—not something I was used to… especially for a kid,—turquoise eyes, a cold essence around him, and he wore a pale blue kimono. He groaned, sighed, and then stared at the dirt road for a time. Then he offered his hand unwillingly to me. I grasped it and he helped me to my feet.

"Thanks." I said, dusting myself off. Oh, let me quickly describe what I myself am wearing. It looks quite like the black shihakushou that the shinigami wear, except sleeveless and more like a tank top for a shirt. My pants are nearly the same, except without the belt and the white tape. I loaned a pair of the sandals though, from the captain who had taken pity on me: Juushirou Ukitake.

"Tch, just go home shinigami." He said, his voice filled with hate.

"Huh? Shinigami? No, I'm not a shinigami. I'm just a regular soul." I said, waving my hands in front of me to explain that I wasn't bad. He just glared at me saying, "Then why are you wearing their uniform?"

"I'm not. See? It's different… although I did borrow the shoes from Captain Ukitake… so I guess I do have a part of the uniform."

"You borrowed something from a captain? Tch, so you are a shinigami."

"I told you, I'm not. I'm actually staying at his barracks with the rest of his division. He and Lieutenant Shiba are very kind. So," I asked him, "what's your name?"

He shrugged and muttered, "Toushirou Hitsugaya."

"Alright, Toushirou. My name is Nazeka Mamori. So, you obviously live around here. What can you tell me… about… this place…?" I stuttered as I watched him turn around and head back into the yard. It was quite barren, but there were a few plants and a bamboo fountain there as well. I folded my arms and yelled, "Hey! You're really rude, you know that!"

He ignored me and just kept on walking toward his house. His grandmother was nowhere to be seen. Toushirou hopped up onto the raised wrap-around porch after discarding his shoes and went around the side of the house. _Damn_, I thought, _what's his problem?_ I chased after him after taking off my own sandals, leaving me in my tabi. I slid a few times on the slick wood, but I managed to catch up with him, grabbing him by his shoulder and making him stop.

"Hey, what's your problem? I only asked for some information on the area and you just looked the other way! Are you always such a little brat?"

"Just shut up and go away!"

"Make me, you little midget!"

His blood seemed to boil at that statement, and I knew instantly, as a fellow midget, that I had hit a nerve. He gritted his teeth, "Who're you calling a midget!? You're not much taller than me!"

"Who cares? I'm still taller, kid!"

"I'm not a kid! Hell, I'm probably twice your age!"

"'Scuse me? You? Ha, like I'd ever believe that."

"Then how old are you?"

"Fifteen."

"Told you. You're fifteen because you were once a soul in the World of the Living, weren't you? You still don't get it."

"I've only been here one day. I'm not _supposed _to get it yet."

"Here in the Soul Society, we age differently. I'm still twice your age, yet I look like I'm eight. You're only fifteen because you died when you were fifteen. You won't change at all, while I will get taller and start to mature. Just think of it as immortality."

"Toushirou! I hope you're not being mean to your friend there," his grandmother came out and smiled the way all grandparents do when they see their grandchildren. She was old and wrinkled, her gray hair pulled back into a tight bun. She was a little pudgy, but that just made her look even more welcoming in her lilac kimono. She was just a little taller than Toushirou, which made me feel like I was much taller, even though I was only a little taller than the both of them. He grimaced, "She's not my friend."

"You should try to make more friends. If you keep acting that way, you will never get anywhere with relationships."

"Why would I even want to get close to anybody? Everyone treats me like I'm something to be afraid of! There isn't anyone else except you and Momo who treat me like I have feelings."_ Oh, he's just like me when I was in the World of the Living_. The World of the Living is what they call the human world.

"What about her?" His grandmother offered, gesturing to me. The fact that I was still holding his shoulder and that I had just barged into their home only then dawned on me. He groaned, "Why would I want to be friends with _her_?"

"Hey…" I muttered, _Stupid kid. If he wants friends, then he's got to treat people better._

"I think you should give her a chance, little Shiro." I could hear him groan almost inaudibly when she said his name like that. He glared at me while his grandma continued, "Oh, where are my manners? I'm Toushirou's grandmother. You can call me grandma or granny if you like. What's your name, dear?"

"I'm Nazeka Mamori, ma'am." I said, quickly bowing in respect. She chuckled and assured me I didn't have to be so formal.

"You're welcome here any time, Nazeka. I hope you and Toushirou get along a little better. Now, I'll leave you two alone while I go and do the laundry."

"Oh, thank you!" I said, glad that I had just gotten to know someone other than Ukitake and his squad and the little midget beside me. She left, walking around the other side through the garden. Toushirou didn't look at me but continued to stare at the wooden porch. I sighed and tapped his shoulder, smiling as best I could, "Alright, let's start over, okay?"

"…Fine. But I'm not doing it because I want to. I'm doing it for Granny." He muttered.

"You two seem really close."

"We are. Granny and Momo are the only ones that seem to understand me."

"So, why are people so afraid of you?"

Toushirou sat down on the edge of the porch. I joined him, enjoying the sunshine that poured onto the warm wood. "You mean you can't tell? Tch, gimme a break, it's quite obvious. I've never done anything to anyone, but they just look at me and try to avoid me. Maybe it's because of my white hair or my blue-green eyes… or maybe it's my cold personality. I was born with it, you know. I have trouble _not_ acting that way. Everybody says, 'I'm just like ice'."

"I don't think it's something that someone should be afraid of. Your physical appearance, I mean. Of course, you could always work a little harder at your personality and the way you treat other people, but what you are now won't go away, so you'll always have trouble."

"Don't start giving me advice on something you don't understand."

"I understand perfectly. In the World of the Living, I was an orphan. My parents died from polio when I was really little. My aunt had died in a car crash, and my other aunt was sick from polio as well. The epidemic is still raging though, even in the 1940's. Some of the girls in my class died from polio. A good friend of my parents was assigned to take care of me, and so I lived with her until I was old enough to live on my own. She owned an apartment complex, so I just stayed there, paying the rent with a job and everything. But, since I was so different from everyone else… I mean, I was living on my own, I was an orphan, trouble always followed me, and I could see spirits—"

"—you could see spirits? So, you had a high reiatsu as a human too, huh?"

"I guess. But anyway, people stayed away from me. I had no friends. Not one. Wherever I went, something always bad happened, but that wasn't ever my fault. Those things that are called Hollows kept following me and causing problems, but I was blamed for everything.

"So you see you're not the only one who's had it rough too. That's why I can give you advice about this. I've been through everything you're dealing with now."

He stayed silent, not sure how to handle the situation. Could he possibly try and be nice to her? But that just seemed so against his nature… but he could try—would try.

"I see. Thanks."

"For what?"

"For understanding…"

"Oh, you're welcome."

We were silent for a while, but it wasn't awkward like before. He seemed much more relaxed around me, and now he was just enjoying the nice weather like me. It wasn't too hot, or too cold. I wondered if he didn't enjoy the heat as well, if he was truly like ice.

"So, I have a question," I said as I leaned onto my back, my voice piercing the silence, "do you prefer the cold or the hot?"

"Cold. Winter's the best. I hate summer or any heat for that matter. I don't see how anyone can stand it."

"Oh, so you really _are_ like ice."

"Huh? What are you…? Oh, I gotcha. Now what about you? Which do you prefer?"

"Neither. Or you could say both. Fall and spring are the best because they're not too hot or too cold, just like it is right now."

"Hm, I suppose that would make sense."

"Can you tell me more about the Soul Society? I really don't know much."

"Why are you in such a rush to learn everything? You have all eternity to do it."

I sat up and frowned, "Not really…" I explained everything to him: what happened to me after I died, how I died, my trial, and why I'm staying at Captain Ukitake's place.

"I hate Shinigami!"

"But why do you hate them so much?"

"Why _don't_ you hate them?"

"Please don't answer my question with a question."

"Like I care. The Shinigami treat everyone like dirt here in the Rukongai. It doesn't matter if we die to them. They live a life of luxury while everyone else in all 320 districts die of violence, sickness, and Hollows. We have very good reason to hate them."

"Yet they keep it from being overrun with Hollows and they help keep up minor problems, like food supply."

"At least you know that much. They're teaching you that Shinigami are okay already."

"Well, I have to start thinking like one now."

"Why? Just because you live with them for now doesn't mean you have to think and act like them too."

"That's not it. I'll be living there from now on. As of the day after tomorrow, I will be officially registered in the Academy for Shinigami. I don't want to go at all, but the head captain is making me. He says that I have an extremely high reiatsu, and that since there are three open captain positions, he thinks that I should be able to fill one of those roles. So, day after tomorrow, you're friend that ran me over will be my classmate."

"Will I not be able to see you that often?"

His question startled me. Was he… was he being nice to me? Did he actually like me? Maybe it was because I could relate to his problems as being alone in the world. I tried to stay serious as I thought how I should phrase the answer.

"So, are you saying you like having me around?"

He blushed and frowned, quickly responding, "N-no. That's not it. I just think that Granny could use some help around here. I mean, she's really old and I can help and all, but sometimes I'm not able to do certain things. Besides, I think it'll do her good having another girl around here since Momo's gone now. And…"

He continued, but I wasn't listening. I smiled, knowing that it was just an excuse. He slowed his speech and looked at me, "You're not paying attention at all, are you?"

"Nope."

"Argh, alright, so I'm being nice to you. Big deal. It's only because you understand. But it won't last if you start treating me like the others," he warned, standing up, his voice filled with sadness. I really didn't know what to say. After all, how often _would_ I be seeing him? I couldn't promise him anything—I didn't have to right to. I had absolutely no rights at all. You could say I had been labeled a dog of the Gotei 13 from the moment I arrived. But still, what was I supposed to tell him? I couldn't just say that I'd see him every day, nor could I say that I wouldn't see him at all.

I sighed and said softly, "Well, I will _never_ treat you the way the others do, Toushirou. But I really can't promise you anything. I don't know when I'll have free time or when I'll be able to do _anything_ other than studies and training at school."

"But you're missing one major point, stupid."

A nerve twitched in my forehead, "_Stupid?_ Who're you calling st—?"

"—You have holidays. Weekends, holidays—they exist. You're free every Saturday and Sunday, and all holidays of the Soul Society. You can come visit me then!"

Holidays? Weekends? How could I have forgotten about them! The weekends were what kept me alive all those years! And without holidays, I would've died sooner!

"You're right… I completely forgot about those!"

"See?"

"Yes! My second life is saved!" I punched my fist into the air. Weekends… how relieving.

--

"Oi! Can't you at least say bye?" Toushirou hollered, making me laugh.

"Yes. Bye, Toushirou! Hopefully I'll see you again soon!"

I walked out of the yard and past the gate, heading home to the Seireitei. Getting in was easy, now that I had a pass from Ukitake. The hard part was getting around the place. It was a maze of buildings, and I was surprised that anyone could've found their way around the place. I even had to ask for directions a few times from a guy wearing white things on his head that looked extremely superior, another time from a guy with long black hair and a pink haired kid on his back, and once more from a guy with red spiky hair… but he wasn't much help.

Eventually I reached Squad 13's barracks (the sun is already set, so I'm completely in the dark). Captain Ukitake was standing at the gate, obviously waiting for me.

"Sorry sir, I was, um… well, I got lost."

I was expecting him to scold me for being out late, or something like that, but he didn't. He merely laughed and opened the gate to let us both in, "No apologies. It's nothing serious. I even get lost sometimes. The Seireitei is one of the most confusing places here in the Soul Society."

"So, sir, are you feeling better? I really hope you didn't get out of bed just to wait for me…" (You see, he was in bed from some sort of disease that he has. If anything, I'd guess Tuberculosis.)

"Oh no, I'm feeling much better. Otherwise, I would have sent Shiba to come and wait for you."

"Oh, I'm glad, sir."

"Please, stop calling me sir. You're not part of my squad but then you are. More like family I suppose. So just call me Ukitake, or if you want to, Juushirou.

"Thank you s—er, I mean Ukitake!"

He smiled and showed me to my room, wished me a good night's sleep, and left to his own room. Not soon after was I laying in bed, exhausted, but quite happy, with how the day had turned out.


	2. Begin the 'Normal Routine'

"Goooooood MORNING NAZEKA! " Ukitake sang, pushing away the sliding door to my room.

"Whaaah!" I screamed, immediately waking up to his intrusion, "U-Ukitake, there's no need to be so loud in the morning… What time is it any way?"I asked, lying back down and covering my head with a pillow. He grabbed it and smiled, "Time for you to go to school!"

I groaned, "Whaaat? I don't wanna go…"

"I don't think you want me to get Vice-Captain Shiba out here do you?"

I bolted out of bed, saluting and saying, "No sir! I'm up!"

He laughed, walking out the door saying, "Alright, you have twenty minutes to be out the door. See you then!" He shut the door and walked off, leaving me alone. I dressed quickly into my red and white shihakushou and grabbed my bag. Oh, right, I forgot to tell you. Yesterday I got my shihakushou fitted and everything else. It was a total pain in the ass I tell you. Having a Lieutenant go with me didn't make things any fun either. Vice-Captain Shiba is a bit loud and obnoxious at times.

In less than twenty minutes, I was ready. My bed and everything else were packed away leaving the tatami mat free of items. I pulled on my sandals after sitting down on the wrap-around porch and waved good-bye to Captain Ukitake, telling him I would be back that afternoon. Before I left the gate, Lieutenant Shiba approached me. He handed me a box that was wrapped up in a small cloth.

"Here, you're going to need a lunch today."

"Oh, thank you, Lieutenant."

"For crying out loud, if the Captain wants you to call him by his first or last name, then by all means call me by those too."

"Okay. Thank you again, Shiba."

He frowned, scratching the back of his head with his left hand, "Hey, that sounds weird. Just call me Kaien, okay?"

"Kaien. Okay, thank you. I really ought to be going now though."

"Alright. Don't get beat up!" He called after me as I walked through the gate.

Once again, I headed through the maze of buildings, but I eventually found another student who introduced herself as Rukia; she had raven-black hair with a single strand of bangs falling in the middle of her face, deep purple eyes, and was about my height. She was in the same year as me, but she was in the lower class. I had been placed in the upper class at the request of Head-Captain Yamamoto. He also stated that I hadn't needed to take an entrance exam, so I just joined immediately.

"I find it strange that you are joining us in the middle of the year…" Rukia said, "And even stranger that you're in the upper class when you didn't even have to take the exam…"

"Blame Head Captain Yamamoto. He's the one that got me into this mess," I told her grudgingly, "I can't believe this… and here I thought that when I died, I would finally be rid of school… man was I wrong."

"So tell me, Nazeka, you were once a soul in the World of the Living… how did you die? You seem to have some special purpose for actually being forced into the Seireitei and into the duties of a Shinigami. Do you know what it is?"

"Actually, I have no idea why I'm being forced into this except that it's because I have a high reiatsu; but if other people also have high reiatsu, then why would I be selected to fill in the position of a captain if there are others much more willing to do that job than me? But anyway, I died from a Hollow."

"A Hollow killed you!? But then, were you devoured? Did you become one?"

"Become one? Why would I become a Hollow?"

"Oh, I see, you still don't understand everything about a Hollow. Well, you'll learn about them in class. Anyway, continue. What happened?"

"Well, I lived alone in an apartment, since I was old enough to hold a job and all… and one day I came home…" I could remember it so vividly. The horror of seeing something so huge and disgusting standing in the middle of my apartment… just ready to devour me…

"I had just come home from my part-time job that I did after school, and I was unlocking the door. When I turned on the lights, the huge creature had been waiting for me. It was disgusting. The smell was awful, like something rotting. The entire room shimmered like heat waves and the only thing I could really focus my eyes on was the huge hole in its chest. It was taller than the ceiling, so it was bent over, holding its scythe-like hands close to its chest while it stared me down. Its head was waving a bunch of tentacles, almost resembling Medusa's head of snakes.

"Next thing I knew, a scream had erupted from my mouth and I was pinned by the neck to the wall behind it. Several of its tentacles that were sprouting from its head had grown to points and pierced my stomach, shoulders, thighs and one of my feet. Everything went black… and then white after that—three more of his tentacles pierced my forehead, chest, and throat, killing me instantly. But you know… I remember hearing a man screaming at the Hollow before he killed me… almost scolding it. I can't remember what he said, and I don't recall ever seeing him, but I know there was definitely a man there…

"Anyway, I wasn't devoured… my soul had made it out of my body and into the Dangai before it was able to. I don't know how I managed to avoid being devoured, but here I am, completely unscathed by the incident."

"Wow, how horrifying!"

"Yeah, well, hey, at least you guys never had to exorcise me as a Hollow." I smiled, glad for at least that much. By now, we had reached the huge school. Students were walking in and out with their friends or alone. Rukia seemed to recognize some of them and called out to one in particular… I recognized him from the other day. He had been the red haired student I had asked for directions from.

"Renji! Renji!" She cried, waving for him. He joined us with a grim look on his face that I immediately read as a 'what the hell do you want?' look.

"What?" He replied gruffly, seemingly acting like he was superior.

"Hey, you could at least act a little nicer! Jeez, you act like you barely know me even though we grew up together!"

"Your point?" Renji asked, but Rukia gave him one of the scariest death glares I have ever seen… not including my own. He grimaced and tried again, "What is it, Rukia?"

"That's better. Renji, this is Nazeka. She's the new student joining your class. Since I won't be around you guys often, I thought it would be best to tag her up with you since you'll be with her more often."

"Why me? Why not team her up with Kira or Momo? She shouldn't have to be my problem…" He asked, rolling his bronze colored eyes.

"Why shouldn't she? And she's not a problem, either! Just show her around," Rukia turned to me, smiling, "I'll see you later, okay?"

"Alright, see ya, Rukia!" I called after her as she ran off to her classroom. She stopped halfway and yelled, "And be nice about it, Renji!"

"Yeah, yeah," Renji groaned, turning to me, "So, she said your name was…?"

"Oh, I'm Nazeka Mamori. Pleased to meet you, Renji…?"

"Abarai. Renji Abarai."

"Alright, Renji Abarai, where to?" I asked, motioning toward the school. He shrugged and walked ahead of me, leading me to who-knows-where. Eventually, we were on the second floor in front of a classroom. He gestured by nodding his head toward the door, allowing me to enter first. There was a pretty big group of students in the classroom, all wearing the uniform except for a tall bald man with glasses. He was wearing the same hakama as the male students, but he wore a plain kosode and a black haori on top. I assumed that this man was the teacher.

The classroom was suddenly hushed as I entered; everyone was staring at me. Then, in a flurry of movement, whispers floated around the room, no doubt about me. The teacher approached me and shouted, "Stop that!" to the other students.

I bowed in respect as Renji walked over to two other students: a boy with blonde hair and an elongated face, and Toushirou's friend, Momo.

"My name is Gengoro Onabara-sensei. You will call me Onabara-sensei, is that clear? Now, you must be Nazeka Mamori, the new student that peaked Head-Captain Yamamoto's interest. You will get no special treatment just because of that. It will be even harsher for you here since you failed to take the exam and you have started in the middle of the year and on a Thursday too... Here is your class schedule. You are to report to the administration office during lunch today." He handed me a piece of paper and walked back to the front of the room.

A bell rang and immediately everyone went to their seats. I found an empty desk behind the blonde-haired kid. Class began with a fiery force. We took notes, were given questions to answer, homework, and then on to the next class. The next one for me was called a Kido class. It was in the Kido training grounds behind the building. Turned out, I had class with Renji and the two others, so I just followed them.

Renji ignored me the entire time, and I never got a chance to introduce myself to anyone since I was having such a hard time finding my way around the huge campus, even though I was following them.

Kido class was a class that taught you how to use what was known as the _Demon Arts_. We practiced a spell called _Sokatsui_, which was classified as Hado Number 33. The blonde-haired kid was first up. His name was Kira Izuru, and from what I could tell, it seemed as though he was pretty good at kido.

"_Ye lord! Mask of flesh and bone, flutter of wings, ye who bears the name of Man! Truth and temperance, upon this sinless wall of dreams unleash but slightly the wrath of your claws. _Hado 33, Sokatsui!"

A blast a blue fire shot from his palm and hit the target just a little off. The instructor praised him, but told him he could've done better. After him were some others of the class, and eventually it was my turn.

"Nazeka Mamori, please come here."

I obeyed, standing several meters away from the desired target. The instructor explained, "Just recite after me, and then aim for the target. Ready?"

"Ah, yes ma'am. I'm ready."

"Alright." She recited the spell Kira had said while I mimicked her.

"Hado 33, Sokatsui!" I yelled, and a small little flame of blue burst from my palm, going about two meters and then fading before it even reached the target. The entire class burst out laughing at my failure, but truthfully, I hadn't been expecting any better. The instructor was laughing too, "Okay, so you didn't get it your first try. Tomorrow I will be expecting better. That will be part of your homework for tonight."

"Yes ma'am," I replied before I returned to my seat. The rest of the class passed by, with the others performing it either poorly or close to perfect. Momo was really good too, while Renji failed miserably. After the Kido class, I had some more classes in the classroom, and then it was lunch time. I found it strange that even as souls, we had lunch.

Lunches were all held at the same time, and since we changed classes anyway, we were allowed to mix with the rest of the students. I met up with Rukia, who grabbed Renji and his friends. All five of us ate lunch together, and I got to know Momo and Kira a little better too.

"So, Nazeka, how come the Head-Captain took an interest in you? Did you do something that he liked?" Kira asked while taking a bite into his sandwich.

I shook my head, un-wrapping my Bento box that Kaien had given me, "No, I just ended up in the Seireitei. I was put on trial in front of the Gotei 13 and they found me innocent. They also noticed that I had some pretty high reiatsu, so they forced me in here."

"You just ended up there?" Kira repeated, not believing it. Momo wondered, "Maybe the Hell Butterfly just got lost?"

"Hell Butterfly?" I asked, not knowing what those are.

"Oh, they're the little black butterflies that Shinigami control. They guide the souls through the Dangai and the Senkaimon, as well as transmit messages amongst the Seireitei," Rukia explained.

"Oh, okay," I stuffed my mouth with some salmon sushi rolls afterward. I chewed for a second and then swallowed, immediately loving it, "Mmm, Kaien—is—such—a good—cook," I said, taking bites of the teriyaki udon noodles that he had prepared as well in between my words.

"Damn, slow down. You'll get a sick stomach," Renji said before taking a sip of his tea.

"Oh, so anyway, Nazeka, you were the girl I saw the other day in the Rukongai, right? Sorry about knocking you down. I was in such a rush to get back to my dorms since the new semester started and everything that I wasn't paying attention. I hope Shirou-chan was nice to you."

"I don't think he would appreciate being called that, and don't worry about it. We're friends now."

"Oh, that's really good! He needs more friends!"

I nodded. The lunch went on with some more questions, some backgrounds, and a lot of eating Kaien's awesome cooking for me. We finished and then all went our ways. I went to my Hoho class, which turned out to be a _flash step_ class, as well as learning how to walk on air (which was so cool!). We were training our bodies to be able to move faster than the eye can follow. The problem is, I was never very fast and I haven't quite learned how to use my reishi, so I looked horrible out there.

After that, I went to my Hakuda class, which is a mix of martial arts. We learned hand to hand combat, which was something I could finally do a little well in. You see, even though I didn't have money to take classes, I had to learn a little on my own since I usually ended up being attacked by Hollows. It was so much fun! It was easy to get the hang of it, but I'm not sure I can fight anybody else right now, or be strong enough to.

The last class of the day was my Zanjustsu class, which was where we learned how to use the swords wielded by Shinigami: Zanpakutou. For today, the students were learning how to finally reach their inner Zanpakutou spirit and materialize the sword, since the sword was made up of your reishi.

"Nazeka Mamori, please come here," The master requested, and I obeyed, joining his side, "You will be doing this exercise as well. These students have been preparing all last semester to find their inner Zanpakutou spirit and communicate with them. You have not done so. Your project for the next month is to prepare and communicate with your Zanpakutou, and then by the time the month is over, I should see you holding your Zanpakutou in your hand."

"Yes sir. I will do my best," I told him. Yes, I know I was sucking up to all the teachers, but the other kids did it at one point to, you know. I returned to where I had been and did as the other students were. They were all sitting cross-legged on the floor, deep in thought, so I did too.

What was I supposed to be doing? How do I communicate with a Zanpakutou? What _is _a Zanpakutou? Spirit? Does that mean our weapons are living things? What will it look like? I decided I should talk to Ukitake that afternoon and focus on trying to talk to my inner spirit.

_Hmmmhmmmhmmm…. La di da di da… hello? Heeeeellllloooo? If you're my Zanpakutou spirit, please answer. …. That's fine, take your time. I have all month…._

Those thoughts continued until the class was over. The bell rang, and it was time to go home. I packed up my stuff and found Rukia in the halls.

"Hey, Rukia!" I called, catching up with her. She smiled and returned the greeting, "Hello, Nazeka. How'd your classes go?"

"Well, the hoho class was horrible, the Hakuda class wasn't bad, but I have no idea what we're doing in the Zanjutsu class. This is going to be a long six years… and it'll take me forever to catch up."

"Well, earlier you said you were staying at the barracks of a captain, right? Well then, ask either him or the lieutenant for help."

"I'll have to do that…" I said, and we talked all the way until we were close to the barracks of the 13th squad. We said our goodbyes and then I returned home. I found it strange that I had already begun calling the place home when I had only been there for three days, but hey, home is where you stay, right?

I immediately began searching for the Captain, and sure enough he was in his room. I decided not to bother him, so I searched for Lieutenant Shiba. Apparently he was in a Vice-Captain meeting. I decided to wait until either one of them were good to talk to, so I stood in the open garden outside my room and began my training homework.


	3. My name is

**Several weeks later**

**Saturday**

**Rukongai District 1: Junrin'an**

It had been several weeks since I had joined the Shino Academy (Shinigami Academy) and not once have I been able to see Toushirou. I felt so bad that even though the deadline for my Zanpakutou materialization was next week and I wasn't even close, I just _had_ to go see him. So, here I am again, walking down the dirt path surrounded by fences in Junrin'an.

I walked through the gate, the cool breeze welcoming me. The place looked empty; the ground seemed hard and cold and the plants looked frozen. I couldn't see Toushirou or his grandmother, so I went around back, taking off my wajiri sandals and walking on the wrap-around porch.

No one was in the back either, so I sat down on the porch.

"Damn, I come to visit him and he's no where to be found. That's just great," I grumbled.

"'Bout time you came back. What has it been, three weeks already?"

"Huh?" I sat up, looking around. I still didn't see him, but then his head poked over the roof, "What the hell are you doing up there!?" I asked him. He gave a mischievous grin and jumped down, "Just thinking. What, are you jealous that I can sit up there and you can't?" He was still wearing his pale blue kimono; and I had never noticed before that he was barefoot.

"Oh yeah, like I'd ever be jealous of you!"

"I bet you are! I have so much more freedom here than you do in that damn academy and I can do almost whatever I want with no homework or projects or dumb things like that!"

"I am not! And I have plenty of freedom, even with homework!"

"If you have plenty of freedom, then why don't you come visit me!?"

"I—Oh… right, sorry," I stared at the ground and noticed that the ground was frozen here too, "Hey, Toushirou, why is the ground frozen here?"

"Hell if I know."

"You didn't do that, did you?" I walked over to a water bucket to find that the water was frozen solid inside, "You did, didn't you! You've frozen all the water here, too!"

"I did not! And are you kidding me? It's almost October here, how can the water be frozen?"

"I'm serious! Come here!" I said, showing him the bucket. Sure enough, the water was frozen. I groaned and scratched the back of my head with my hand, "Damn, Hyourinmaru, can't you keep everything from being frozen? Why do you like having ice around so much anyway?"

Toushirou stared at me, confused. I didn't even know what I just said. It just sort of… came out. I didn't even know who this Hyourinmaru was!

"What did you just say?"

"I… I don't know. I don't even…" I touched my mouth as if it was the cause of everything. Toushirou smirked, "Heh, looks like I'm not the only weirdo around here!"

"You take that back you little—argh!" I tried to smack him on the head, but he ducked and kicked me over, laughing, "Aren't you supposed to be learning this kind of stuff in your school? Man, you suck!"

"Shut up!" I yelled at him, detaching my face from the ice (my head had landed on the frozen bucket). "OW!" I ripped my cheek off the frozen water. It was blazing red, "Damn you Toushirou! That hurt!"

"Oh, sorry!" He grinned while I chased him around the yard, "I'm gonna stick _your _head in the bucket and leave it there! Let's see how you like it!" I screamed at him. He stopped and twisted around, tripping me. I got up and was about to hit him in the head with the bucket, but instead of that, water poured out and soaked him.

"Oh! Sorry, Toushirou! Now how did that happen? It was just frozen a second ago…"

"_Damn that Hyourinmaru. Jeez, he always has to go around freezing everything. There's more to life than the cold…"_

The voice echoed in my head; it was a male voice, someone I've never heard before. _Who are you?_

"_Huh? Oh, so you can finally hear me huh? About time."_

_Who are you? Please, what is your name?_

"_My name is—"_

"Hey, Nazeka! Stop staring off into space like that! Look, sorry about making you hit your head against the bucket, but I was just having fun!" Toushirou waved his hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention.

"Hey Toushirou…" I said quietly, "Have you ever heard a voice inside your head? Like, one that you've never heard before?"

"No. Don't tell me you're schizophrenic now…"

"I don't mean something like that!" I felt a nerve twitch in my temple, "I mean… well, even I don't really know what I mean…"

"Well, neither do I. Hey, Granny will want to know that you're here. Why don't you come in and see her?"

"Oh, sure!" I smiled, putting down the bucket and following him inside. Granny Hitsugaya was kneeling in the living room, drinking tea. Toushirou ran up to her and said something quietly in her ear before kissing her on the cheek and running back to me. He dragged me by the sleeve of my hakama and asked me to sit down beside his grandmother.

"I'll be right back; I'm going to make the rest of us some tea," he ran out of the room and into what I assumed to be the kitchen. Now that I thought about it, this was the first time I had actually been inside Toushirou's house. The rooms were simple—Ukitake explained that all houses were like this in Soul Society—with sliding doors and tatami mats (only the Royal Families had nicer floors and different layouts). They typically had several rooms, mainly consisting of two bedrooms, a kitchen, a living room, and one extra small room. Whether or not they had bathrooms… I did not know.

"It's good to see that you're back keeping Toushirou company. I'm so old that I can't do much of anything any more, so it's good to see him out with younger people," his grandmother said, taking another sip of her tea.

"Oh, well I'm sure he doesn't mind. He loves you a lot, I can tell," I assured her. She smiled; and then Toushirou walked in the room carrying a small tray with a pot of tea, and two more cups. He handed me one of the after pouring the steaming hot tea, "Here, Nazeka. I hope you like white tea."

"Oh, thank you," I said, taking a sip carefully out of the cup. It was truly delicious; it even beat Kaien's cooking! He poured his granny some more tea and we all sat in silence for awhile, sipping the herbal drink.

"Toushirou, you're all wet. What happened?" His grandma soon asked him. I laughed, "Whoops, my bad." She was confused, so Toushirou explained, "We had a little mishap with the water pail."

"Oh, I see," she smiled. She could obviously tell that we had been horsing around.

"So how are things going at the Shinigami Academy?" Toushirou asked. I appreciated him asking that, since I knew he hated it so much… but he still looked unhappy about mentioning it.

"Well, I'm actually in the same class as Momo. She and I have a lot of classes together actually. I'm not very good at kido yet, but I think that over time I'll get the hang of it. Hakuda is okay… and I absolutely fail at my hoho class. My deadline to materialize my zanpakutou is this Friday and I'm nowhere near materializing it, so for now, I can't do anything in that class. They keep telling me that in order to materialize it, I need to be in complete unison with my inner world and must truly be listening. But every time I try, something always interrupts me."

"So in other words…" Toushirou began, arms folded against his chest, "…you suck at everything!"

"Huh!? Shut up! You didn't have to say it like that! I just don't think I'm cut out for this Shinigami work…"

"You can say that again."

"You're not helping, Toushirou!"

"Toushirou, please be a little nicer about it. You don't need to be so cold to people," his grandma said quietly. He immediately shut up. Oh sure, his grandma can scold him and get away with it; but if I try to, then it only gets worse!

--

"See ya later, Toushirou!" I yelled, waving to him as he sat down on the roof of his house again. He waved and shouted back, "Come back sooner this time, okay?"

I smiled and walked out the gate, through the streets, and into the Seireitei again. Once again, I was faced with the challenge of getting back to the barracks. You would have thought that by now I would've figured out my way around—but no! I can't get a mental map of this place in my head! It's almost impossible to figure out!

So, once again I had to ask for directions; but this time it was only once. I got there in almost no time at all thanks to the directions given to me by the guy with the white things in his hair. He didn't seem too happy to see me again, though.

Captain Ukitake was feeling much better now, so I passed him on the way to my room.

"Dinner's waiting for you when you're ready. It'll be in the dining hall. I told Lieutenant Shiba to watch and make sure that none of the other squad members ate it."

"Oh thank you, Ukitake. I'll be sure to get it before too much later."

It was nearly sundown, so I decided I would do a little more meditation on my zanpakutou materialization before I had dinner and went to bed. The best place to do that is in the middle of the garden outside my room: right next to the little fish pond.

I sat Indian style and leaned against the huge decorative rock, closing my eyes and concentrating on my inner world.

--

A cool breeze enveloped me, and I watched as flower petals fell before me—Cherry Blossoms, Peach Blossoms, and Plum Blossoms all falling at the same time. A small part of me told me that that wasn't possible. The sound of wind through tree branches and over grass could be heard all around me as the petals revealed a huge stone single towered temple with no door; the temple reached high above the clouds as I looked up. It must have been sixty stories or more; either way, I couldn't see the top. There were stone gates behind me that were slightly run down, but still in pretty good condition.

"Where… am I?" I wondered. I certainly didn't recognize the place. I wandered around the grassy plain around the temple, noting that there weren't any walls around the perimeter; only on that one side. The grassy plain kept going as far as the eye could see on all sides except for the one with the gate. I had the slightest notion that that gate was used for keeping things on _this_ side of the fence, not the other way around.

When I came back around to the front of the temple, a pair of doors—that I was certain hadn't been there before—swung open, creaking on the hinges. I entered hesitantly, not really knowing what to expect. There was a single stone statue next to the entrance of a winding set of stairs—no doubt leading to the very top. The statue was old and crumbling, but I was still able to make out what it had once been: an Asian dragon.

There was no where else for me to go except up, so that's where I went. It wasn't long before I got tired; and I assumed that I was up around the twentieth story or so by the time I hated the idea of dragging my feet upward. But, I had to go up; I had only two options: go up forty more stories, or go back down twenty. Either way, there were stairs. I decided on going upward, so I kept forcing myself to climb the crumbling—and no doubt dangerous—stone stairs.

Windows began appearing the farther I went until there was barely any wall left. The stairwell ended soon after, coming to an open rooftop high above the clouds with four outstretching platforms in each of the cardinal directions. They were about five meters long each, ending in a circular platform: the one to south had a huge basin in which clear, fresh water rippled at the slightest breeze; the western one had a huge pile of gold and silver piled high like a statue; and the eastern one had a huge stack of discarded bones, whether or not they were human or animal I could not tell.

Still, on the northern platform was the most astonishing of all: a huge steel gray Asian Lung dragon with a mane of teal and four massive bird like feet, all ending in talons the size of my hands. His eyes were closed—sleeping silently—while his tail swished back and forth dreamily. He was curled up tightly; his clawed feet tucked underneath him while his tail curled around. His massive head was resting upon the root of his tail, the long flowing whiskers on either side of his face limp with sleep. He had two horns on the top of his head, and his mouth resembled more of a dog's mouth than that of a dragons. He was furry, not scaly; and it was obvious that by the shape of his mouth his teeth were thick and dangerous.

As I looked on in both amazement and horror, the dragon slowly fluttered his eyes and, yawning ferociously, he uncurled himself to his full length—a stunning display. He was nearly the size and length of a skyscraper turned on its side. How he managed to fit on that platform was beyond me.

His eyes were a blazing yellow, and I could not look away as his gaze pierced mine. He gave one great big roar—quite like a lion's—and stood up tall and proud before speaking. Spiritual pressure so intense filled the area, and I was sure that the tower was going to crumble beneath me.

"So, you finally came after all this time. It's been centuries since my last wielder."

His voice resembled a young man, and I recognized it as the voice that had spoken to me at Toushirou's house.

"Please, who are you?" I asked, and he lifted his head. The spiritual pressure increased, and soon it became almost too hard to hear.

"Do you think you can wield me? I am a zanpakutou. If you think you can handle my powers—both the good and the bad—then hear my name!"

"I can't… I can't hear you!" I yelled at him. The pressure was blocking out my ears; my vision hazed over and it became hard to see.

"My name is—! My name is—!"

_I can't hear him… I can't hear him!_

Then… everything went black again.

--

I gasped as I awoke, lying on my back. I didn't immediately recognize the wooden ceiling, the cool blankets that were beneath me, and the tatami mat covering the floor until several footsteps from outside helped pull me from my state of confusion. The sliding door opened and Ukitake stepped through, bowed and smiled, shutting the door behind him, "Good to see you're awake again. How are you feeling?"

I watched him as he held out a cup of tea in his hands, "What… what happened?" I took the cup eagerly and gulped it down, not caring that my throat burned from the heat.

"You fell asleep while training and you've been out for several hours, not including the time you would normally sleep."

"What time is it?" More like what day, but either way, I would get an answer.

"It's 3 o'clock on Sunday. Hope you got all your homework done before you went to visit your friend in the Rukongai."

"3 o'clock!? I've been out that long... and I didn't even get to hear his name…"

Ukitake stared at me, confused for a mere moment; but then he understood, "You had a conversation with your zanpakutou, didn't you? That's good. I was beginning to worry that you weren't ever going to talk to it. So tell me, what did he look like? I'm just curious, so you don't have to answer." He sat down beside my bed and took the cup from me.

"Oh, no, I don't mind. He's this huge gray dragon with a long tail and whiskers. He looks very wise, and he asked me if I could wield him, even with all the bad things that come along with him. What did he mean? Are there some zanpakutous that have downfalls with them, rather than just power?"

"Yes. Most zanpakutous have an equal balance of greatness and of weakness. It keeps it so that a zanpakutou may not unbalance the equation between shinigami and their weapons. If the weapon is strong, and the shinigami is equally strong, but the two are stronger than normal, the ending result is a pair so powerful it could easily disrupt the balance and cause chaos. If a shinigami is strong, but the weapon is weak, or vice versa, it creates an equal balance between the two. Do you understand?"

"Yes, I do. But I have another question. If a zanpakutou is very strong, but has more weaknesses than strength, does it do any good for the wielder?"

"Sometimes yes and sometimes no. I assume you believe that your zanpakutou has a lot of weaknesses, but possesses great strength. In your case, I believe that it will help balance the connection between you."

"I see… so I should accept his power?"

"If you don't, I don't know what Ol' Man Yama will do to you… but I can assure you, you won't be punished lightly."

"So even if I want to decline his offer, I can't…" I muttered, quite upset. Why would I want a zanpakutou to even have any weaknesses at all? Then again, if I had a zanpakutou that was better than everybody else's, then I suppose that wouldn't be fair. But, who said working in the army was fair? I mean, in war it's always best to have the upper hand… but even so…

"Don't take it personally. Ol' Man Yama's just trying to do what's best for everyone in the Soul Society. But since you're awake, I would do whatever you need to for today before it gets too late." He stood up and opened the sliding door, glancing over his shoulder to me, "Oh, and I hope you thank Lieutenant Kaien. He was the one who found you."

"Oh, okay."

He shut the door behind him and I could hear the hollow footsteps echo away as he left.

_I will receive your power… whatever the cost; and I _will_ hear your name._


	4. Motive

**Shinigami Academy**

**September 30****th****, 1946**

"Are you telling me that you don't have your assignment done?" My zanjutsu instructor scolded, his face clenched up in anger.

"Uh, yes sir. I… I did hear him, but I wasn't able to materialize my zanpakutou because I wasn't able to hear his name—"

"That was the whole point of the assignment! I gave you an entire month to handle this project, and you didn't get anywhere! Now you're going to be behind! I'm going to have to talk to Captains Ukitake and Yamamoto and discuss this issue. Don't think you're getting off lightly, Mamori!" He walked back to his desk while I bowed respectfully and exited the room.

Remember how I said that my deadline was nearing a close last chapter? Well… it's Monday of that week, and I still didn't manage to materialize my zanpakutou in time. As much as I hate to admit it, I don't think it was a good idea seeing Toushirou on Saturday. Oh, and well… now you know what year it is. Yep, I was born on April 30th, 1932. I died this year on August 21st, 1946. Anyway, time, I suppose, would be essential knowledge for you.

I left the building and walked solemnly past Renji and the others. They didn't seem to notice me, so I just left them alone; besides, I was in too much of a bad mood. Even the fact that I had improved on my kido and passed my first demonstration quiz didn't help. My hoho grade was still terrible and as for my hakuda class… well, let's just say I'm learning. But hey, this was my first month in the school. Gimme a break.

I pondered over the fact that I couldn't even hear my zanpakutou's name the entire time I walked home. I passed one of the squad members I recognized as Sentarou Kotsubaki, the third seat. I head bowed as I passed him, but he made no remark of recognition, so I just kept going. Ukitake's voice could be heard as I passed his office, as well as Kaien's. I decided I shouldn't interrupt them, but what they were saying caught my interest. I pressed my ear against the door lightly and listened in, but I missed the first half.

"—Kuchiki requested that his younger sister be admitted into the Gotei 13 in a few years or so, after she completes most of her training. Unfortunately, that means she won't graduate."

"I see. Well, she's always welcome here!"

"Captain, you always say that, and you wonder why our squad ends up being the largest…"

"Well, how could I turn away from someone who needs a place to stay?"

"You and Kyouraku-taicho are two of a kind…"

Ukitake started laughing, but he began to cough violently due to his sickly state. Footsteps hurried themselves and Kaien's voice said, "Sir, please, don't strain yourself. If you need to, you should go lie down."

I accidentally made a small sound of approval, but one word popped in my head instantly as I heard footsteps closer to the door—_busted_. The sliding door was ripped open, catching my right ear. I held it and staggered away, moaning at my idiocy; but I froze as soon as I heard a growl of annoyance from the door. I turned slowly and looked up at Kaien's face—his eyes felt like they were boring into my soul and I saw his right cheek twitch slightly.

"Nazeka…" He said my name like he was possessed.

"Ah… heh, good afternoon… Lieutenant Shiba. Feeling well?" I tried, but his arm shot out, grabbed the sleeve of my kosode and pulled me into the room, slamming the sliding door shut in one fluid motion. I could mentally see a huge fire behind him as he clenched his fists and shouted, "You friggin' moron! What the hell are you doing eavesdropping on our damn conversation! How do we know you haven't been doing this ever since you got here! You could be in some serious trouble for that, you understand! I should—"

"—Kaien, please calm down. I'm sure she would like to explain why she was eavesdropping," Ukitake interrupted, wiping the bit of blood on his mouth with his haori, "Now Nazeka, I hope you will explain."

"Yes sir. I just happened to hear you say the name of—" Just as I was about to explain, a Hell butterfly flew into the room. It landed lightly on the Captain's finger and relayed its message silently before flying out of the room again. Ukitake sighed and stood up, "Captain Yamamoto has requested an audience with me and your teachers at school, Nazeka."

I could feel the hair on my neck stand on end.

"We are to discuss how this month has been. Anything you want me to say on your behalf?"

"…Well, could you tell them I've been working very hard? I'm really trying, but after all that, I still couldn't hear my zanpakutou's voice."

"Alright. Anything else?"

"No, sir."

"Okay, Kaien, I'm off. You're in charge while I'm gone. Please try to get some of the paperwork done while I'm gone."

"Yes sir."

He walked out of the room and shut the door behind him. Both Kaien and I stayed silent until his footsteps could no longer be heard. When they disappeared, Kaien turned to me and grabbed my head, his face twitching again, "Alright… I'm gonna keep you busy while he's out taking care of your curriculum. Now, you're gonna help me with all that paperwork you see over there." He pointed to a tall stack of paper on Ukitake's desk, "Now get busy."

"But what do I do?" I asked, still staring in horror at the amount. He let go and motioned for me to follow him. He pointed to the couch in front of a low wooden table. I sat down obediently and watched wide eyed as he set down more than half the stack of papers in front of me on the table. He picked the top sheet up and held it up for me to see, "Okay, you see this? This is a report that comes from the other members of our squad. Most of them are written by either me or the Captain, and as you can see, all of these have been finished. _But_ your job is to go over them to make sure there are no mistakes."

"All of them?"

"Yes. _All of them._"

"Oh…" I said quietly, taking the first sheet from him and beginning to read. _"The mission went quite well. About fifteen Hollows were executed during the time there—a usual number. Nothing out of the ordinary…"_ I kept reading, but I was practically falling asleep. They were so _boring! _And most of them were the same, too! Killed some Hollows, performed what was known as a Konso, erased a few memories, and that was it!

It took about an hour and fifteen minutes to read through them all and correct them, but then I was assigned the task of rewriting the ones that had needed revisions. That was when I asked if I could leave so I could go talk to my still not yet formed zanpakutou.

"What do you mean you don't have your zanpakutou formed yet? You've been training for the past month almost non-stop ever since you entered that school, and now you're telling me you still haven't materialized your zanpakutou?"

"Ahuh. I've seen him… and talked to him. But whenever he tries to tell me his name, his spiritual pressure drowns it out. I can never hear him."

"So maybe you _do_ need more training. But that also means that you didn't finish your assignment on time. That's what the Head Captain wanted to talk about. You knew that, didn't you?"

"Yes."

"Alright, get going."

"Thank you, Kaien."

I set down my pen and headed for the door, but Kaien called out before I could make it out of there, "Hey! Until you finally materialize your zanpakutou, you have to add a suffix to my name! Call me Kaien-dono from now on!"

I nodded, smirking as I left, though I knew I was in no position to. The air was cool outside, and once again I was sitting in my favorite spot next to the fish pond, cross-legged and eyes closed.

--

"Child. Child! Wake up!"

I felt something brush across my face—something soft and feathery; my zanpakutou spirit's tail welcomed me as I opened my eyes. The huge dragon was curled up again on the same northern platform, watching me carefully as I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

"Child. Do you know who I am?"

I answered, "Of course not. Every time you try to tell me your name, it's blocked out by your spiritual pressure."

He laughed—it was more like a snarl than anything else; his lips curled back to reveal pointed daggers for teeth: the canines reaching to about three meters long, "_My_ spiritual pressure? No, no, you are wrong about that. What is blocking your ears is your own. What you fail to realize is that it's your fault for not listening hard enough."

"My fault?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yes. You were forced into this; therefore you have no desire to actually listen other than the fact that you might be punished by the Head Captain. Unlike you, others chose to go through with this on their own free will. Why do you think that is?"

"… I don't really know."

"That is your problem. You have no motive. Find some other reason to go through with this, and then you might hear my name."

"Please, just let me try again once more."

"Insolent child. You will not be able to hear me."

"I know, but I still want to try again."

He sighed, his piercing gaze focused on mine.

"Alright. My name is—"

I listened carefully, but to no avail. It was still lost in the dull roar from my spiritual pressure.

"What did I tell you? I said you weren't going to hear me."

"Then tell me something else—since I can't hear your name. How do I find this other motive you were telling me about?"

"The easiest thing is to find something to protect. Maybe it's friends or family; maybe it's something physical—like money; maybe they feel it's their duty to protect others even though they don't know who they are; or maybe they feel that they should protect the Soul Society or just the Rukongai. So tell me: what is it that you hold dear and precious to you? That will be your motive," he curled himself up tighter.

What did I hold precious in this afterlife? Certainly not many of the shinigami; not the Gotei 13, other than those I was friends with; and even that was limited to just Kaien and Ukitake. Then there was Rukia, Kira, Momo, and Renji from school… and then there was Toushirou and his grandmother. So… my friends? But the question is… could I actually give up my own life just to protect them? Would I?

"If you're not going to answer right away, then I'm going to sleep. The spell on me is still pretty tight since you still don't know my name."

"Spell?"

"A kido. It just makes me very tired and keeps me dormant most of the time. When the time when you actually hear my name comes, you'll wish this spell was still on me."

"Oh, well that's reassuring."

"Good night."

"Er… good night…"

--

The sun had finished setting when I had awakened, and I was left in darkness. My room was right there though, so after a quick shower and finishing up all the written work of my homework, I went to bed, still wondering what my zanpakutou's name was.

What is it that I want to protect?


	5. Disaster!

**13****th**** Squad's Barracks**

**February 15****th****, 1948**

"That's the new girl, huh?"

"Yeah, that's her. Kuchiki, right?"

"Yep. Guess the nobles found someone else they can use as a toy."

A bunch of shinigami crowded around the door, whispering about the newcomer beyond. I tapped one of them on the shoulder, "Hey, what's going on?"

She turned around and glared, "What, haven't you heard? There's a new squad member. She hasn't even graduated yet, or taken the final exam. They say she's been adopted by the Kuchiki family, a noble family."

"Kuchiki?" I tried to see, but everyone was blocking the door.

"Hey! Hey! What are you doing here wasting time!" I spun around, only to be pushed out of the way by Kaien, "This is not a zoo! Go back to your assigned spots, dumbasses!" He shoved open the door and quickly introduced himself, "I am Vice-Captain Shiba Kaien! Nice to meet you!"

I tried to see who it was again, but the door was blocked again. The newcomer was so quiet that I could only hear Kaien speaking. He chewed whoever it was out because they didn't address him properly. Eventually I got to the front of the crowd and peeked through the crack. Beyond Kaien, was Rukia, standing in a shinigami uniform.

I gasped, "That's right! Rukia told me that she was being accepted into a noble family! She's gonna be in our squad!" I pulled open the door and ran past Kaien to her side, "Rukia!"

"N-Nazeka! Why are you—?" She smoothed out her raven hair—no doubt it was Kaien who had messed up her hair.

"I live here, remember? So, that means we'll still see each other here!"

"You know her?" Kaien asked, and I smiled, "Of course. I met her on the way to school on my first day! We've been friends ever since! Unfortunately, we weren't in the same class."

"I was wondering how _you_ could've possibly known someone who was accepted into a noble family."

"Are you suggesting that I'm not good enough to know someone like that?"

"Maybe," He said, sticking his tongue out.

"Argh… I can't think of a good comeback right now."

"Ha!"

"You're lucky, Kaien!"

"That's Kaien-dono!"

"I don't care! That's just because I don't have my zanpakutou yet! You just wait! When I become captain, I won't let you call me Nazeka! It'll always be Mamori-taicho!"

"Like you'd ever become a captain."

"Um… Nazeka?" Rukia asked quietly.

"What?"

"Where is the captain?"

Kaien answered for me, "He's sick in bed right now. He wasn't feeling so good—he had another attack last night."

"Another one! Why don't you people tell me these things!"

"Why do you need to know?"

"Because he's the captain and he was nice enough to let me stay here when I had first got here _and_ he is still allowing me to stay here until I get placed in a squad! I at least owe him to visit him when he's sick!"

"Yeah, that would be the norm, but you're so loud and obnoxious that it wouldn't be a good idea for you to go and visit him."

"I'm not loud or obnoxious!"

"You're certainly being loud now, and you're obnoxious to me."

"Shut up! You bastard…" I turned to Rukia, "Excuse me Rukia I have to go see the captain now. I'll see ya later, then!"

**Seireitei**

**December 20****th****, 1950**

Two years later, I hadn't mastered materializing my zanpakutou; but I continued visiting Toushirou when I could. What I was supposed to protect—that fact continued to evade me, and my zanpakutou spirit never failed to remind me. Not once had he given me more information than that; and not once had my teacher let it go. My damn zanjutsu master nagged me about it all those years, but had resorted to training me with a simple katana. That way, I could receive all the swordsmanship I needed; I just wouldn't be able to learn shikai until I materialized my weapon.

Head Captain Yamamoto did not let me forget it either; I was officially on Academic Probation and would not graduate until I materialized it—even if I had to repeat year six year after year after year. My unwanted position of captain was slowly disappearing from sight; and that was okay with me, but not with Yamamoto. He said that I could not fail in that job; but I didn't see what the big deal was. I was sure there were plenty of others ready to fill in this position.

That day was also Toushirou's birthday; or at least, that's what he and his grandmother decided on. He explained that those living in the Rukongai usually lose track of time and forget about celebrating birthdays, but he felt that he should at least give it a try. I had turned twenty, but that didn't matter anymore. I hadn't changed—I hadn't grown taller, older, or really even grown wiser. Looks like I was finally ready to give up my age.

Also, there had been a noticeable reiatsu change with Toushirou. The grounds are icy mostly at night, and he says that they usually only melt when he leaves the premises or during the day—but even then they're icy sometimes. He's seen it snow during the middle of the summer before, but only at his house. Then there's all the water freezing over, and he says that his Granny seems to suffer from constant colds. I keep telling him that he has a high reiatsu, but he refuses to believe me. I feel like he's keeping something from me… but I just don't know what. The last I had seen him was in August during my summer break.

_I just hope that he at least takes it into consideration eventually,_ I thought as I held the bag of amanatto—one of his favorite foods—and walked down the streets of Junrin'an. It didn't take long, and soon I approached the gate to his house; I immediately felt the chill in the air; but it wasn't icy when I arrived.

"Toushirou! Hey! Where are you?" I called, looking around the typically cold yard. I stood there for a few minutes, yet no one came to greet me, like usually did. _Well, guess I better see if anyone's inside._

I took off my sandals, opened the door to the house and peered inside. His grandmother was sitting in her same spot reading a book, this time wearing a teal gray kimono. I shut the door behind me and said happily, "Good morning, Granny Hitsugaya. How are you today?"

She turned around and smiled faintly, "Oh, Nazeka. It's good to see you again. I'm well this morning."

"That's good. Is Toushirou here? I came by so I could give him this for his birthday," I held out the bag of amanatto, "I heard these are his favorites."

"Thank you. You didn't have to do that. But as for Toushirou… he's in the bedroom. He hasn't quite been himself lately since… well I'll let him tell you. His is the second door when you turn left outside."

"Really?" I asked, looking in the direction of the door, "Well, thank you. I'll go and talk to him. Good to see you."

"You too, Nazeka."

I gave a small bow of respect and left for the door, taking the left and pausing in front of his room. I knocked lightly on the traditional door, the same as mine, and said kindly, "Hey, Toushirou! I came to tell you happy birthday and give you a present, but I can't exactly do that if you have the door closed."

There was a long moment of silence before his muffled reply, "Go away."

"Hey, how come you're so upset? It's your birthday, so you should be happier. Come on out."

"Please, just… just go home."

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

"Go home."

I rolled my eyes upward and sighed, grabbing the edge of the door and flinging it open, "Damn it Toushirou, get out here! What the hell happened to make you like this! It's your damn birthday so be happy for cryin' out loud!" I stormed into the room and grabbed him by the collar of his kimono, dragging him out of the room and tossing him onto the ground by the porch.

"What the hell! What was that for!"

"You know damn well what that was for! When people act depressed it pisses me off, so just tell me what the hell happened and get over it already!" I could feel a vein pop in my forehead as a yelled at him. He stared at me for a long time in silence, wide-eyed until I calmed down. Then he lowered his head and said quietly, "I've been enrolled in the Shinigami Academy."

"Er… what?" I asked, surprised, plopping down onto the slick porch. He repeated himself, yet I couldn't get myself to believe it, "Wait a sec, you hate shinigami, so why would you become one?"

"This shinigami in the area told me that I had a high spiritual pressure… just like you said before. I was slowly killing my grandmother because I keep leaking it everywhere. That's why it's always so cold here and why it snows. If I don't learn how to control my spiritual pressure… I'll kill Granny, and I don't want that to happen."

"But you don't want to enroll, either."

"Like hell I'd want to become one of _them_," he said as he stood up and brushed himself off.

"Figures. So, you've enrolled… and you passed the test?"

"Yeah."

"Well, that's good. Hey, we'll be going to school together! We'll be able to see each other much more often now! And you can meet Renji, and Rukia, and Kira! And you'll be allowed in the Seireitei now, so you can come see the place where I live as long as I get permission from Ukitake!"

"Jeez, you're ecstatic."

I froze and smiled, "Well… yeah."

"Glad you're happy," he said sullenly. I sighed, "You should be too."

"I won't."

"You'll meet new friends."

"Will not. You know how much other people don't like me."

"I liked you, and I was an 'other' person. You never know. And hey, you might be good at this."

"Will not."

"I bet you will. I mean, look at the reiatsu you have! They say I have a lot too, but I can't freeze stuff like that! I can't even hear my zanpakutou's name!"

"That doesn't mean anything."

"You are such a downer! Fun sponge!"

"Excuse me?"

"You're a fun sponge. You suck all the fun out of everything."

"I do not."

"Do too."

"Not."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I don't."

"Yeah, you kinda do."

"Then why do you keep coming back here?"

"Because— I… I don't really know."

"Thanks…"

"Not what I meant."

"Sure."

"I'm serious."

"Where's my present?"

"Your… what?" I raised my eyebrows.

"My present. You said you brought one."

"Oh, right. It's your birthday."

"You've reminded me."

"Greedy little runt…" I muttered under my breath as I grabbed the bag off the porch.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, nothing. Anyway, here ya go. Happy Birthday." I handed him the amanatto, which he immediately dug his hand into and stuffed some in his mouth.

"What, no thank you?"

"—nks," was all he managed to get out with his mouth stuffed full of the treats. I leaned back and looked up at the cloudless sky. What a weird way to start off the day.

I promised Toushirou that I'd see him again, if not before the end of the year. But, that was no big deal, since we'd be seeing each other everyday for the next school year… that is, if I graduate.

But… that graduation was only going to happen if I materialized my zanpakutou.

Until then, I continued to work with a simple katana, and unfortunately for me… I was still asked to go on a practice mission for school even though I had had no powers other than kido whatsoever.

"Let's start with some quick introductions. I'm a sixth-year student. Name's Hisagi. Behind me, little one's Kanizawa. Big one's Aoga. The three of us will be leading today's training exercise," a tall boy with black hair and the number '69' tattooed on his left cheek. He seemed bored, like this was a regular thing. Behind him were a girl, and another boy. The girl was blonde, and looked serious, while the guy had big lips and a funny-looking hair cut… but he _was_ tall. They were standing in front of one of the Senkaimon gates. After the intro, everyone in the group started whispering.

"Quiet! Those of you who are whispering will STOP. NOW!"

Renji ignored him and asked Kira quietly, "What's the deal? Are they famous or somethin', those three?"

Kira looked appalled and replied immediately, "You don't know! It's not 'those three', it's the one in the middle! And he's not just _'famous'_! That's Shuhei Hisagi. He was accepted into the Gotei 13 years ago, even though he hasn't yet graduated, even though he's still a sixth-year student. In the future, they say he's guaranteed to have a seat position in one of the divisions. He's one of the Academy's shining stars!"

"Wow…" Renji said, but Kira immediately began again, "Of course… he failed the entrance exam twice, too… Meaning, as this year's top student, I probably have more talent than he does."

"Uh… wow." Renji said again, this time with a dull look on his face.

"So, he's supposed to have a seat position, huh? Hmm… y'know, he'd make a nice lieutenant," I said, but Kira glared at me, "Don't rub in the fact that you're supposed to be a captain by making comments like that."

"Funny how I'm headed for captain yet I'm not famous like he is. Though I don't care if I make captain or not."

"You're famous for failing almost every class."

"Shut up Mr. Perfect! I'd like to see _you_ make captain! You don't need grades to make a shinigami! It's talent and skill and dedication!"

"Which you have none of."

"Shut up!"

"All right, for this assignment we'll divide into three-person teams. Before, in the classroom, we had you all pick scraps of paper. Take a look at those papers now. Do you see a symbol there? Please look for the other students who have the same symbol, and form a group," the girl Kanizawa began, and we all opened our slips of paper.

Mine had an 'x' on it, while Renji and Kira both had skulls, "Aww, looks like I'm not in your group… oh well. Gotta go find mine," I said, and I walked around hesitantly until I found two guys with the same symbol. The tall one was named Takai, while the other blonde guy was Oziru. I knew them both from my kido class.

"Guess I'm with you guys," I groaned.

"So it seems," Takai mumbled.

"What's with that attitude?"

"What's with yours?"

"Don't get in the way," Oziru interrupted simply. I narrowed my eyes, "Excuse me?"

"You can't perform a konso because you don't have a zanpakutou yet. You're just comin' along for the ride to see how it's done because the Head Captain doesn't want you to miss out on anything important."

"So?"

"_So_ you're going to get in the way if you'll just be watching. Get in our way, and you'll wish you hadn't."

"Great, so I have a couple of asses in my group. That's just my luck."

"You've all got your Hell Butterflies? Then move out! Open!" Hisagi interrupted, opening the Senkaimon. I glared at the two guys and followed our leaders through the gate, wondering if Karakura Town had changed at all. Though, now that I think about it… it's only been five years… so it shouldn't have changed.

Our Hell Butterflies carried us through, showing us the way out of the in-between world. Eventually, we opened up onto a building roof, where Hisagi began directing groups into different places in the special area designated for this practice mission. Ours was sent a little ways farther off, near the outer ring of the area to the north.

Kanizawa followed us and explained how to perform a konso. It seemed easy enough, but I wasn't allowed to. Without a zanpakutou, you can't send your spirit energy through the hilt, keeping you from placing the seal on the soul's forehead and sending him/her to the Soul Society. So, instead, the two guys in my group did theirs, practicing twice before Kanizawa moved on. From there, we were asked to just wait until the others were done.

How. Boring. And of all things, I was stuck with those two dumbasses. Can't I get a break?

"Hey, girl," Oziru called. I twitched and looked behind me, glaring at him, "I have a name you know. Or are you too stupid to remember?"

"Why you little—!"

"Don't mind him. Besides, he couldn't remember his own name if I didn't remind him all the time," Takai said smugly. I folded my arms, "You're in the same dumbass boat as he is. In fact, he has brawn and no brains… and you… well, you don't have anything at all."

He stared at me, mouth open wide. I smirked, "What, are you too stupid to make a decent comeback now? Gimme a break."

He didn't answer, but instead raised his arm and pointed to something above me; and I realized that he wasn't looking at me, but at something else behind me. I turned, expecting something to be right there, but that wasn't it either. In the distance, by where some other groups were gathering… was an enormous Hollow… with Kanizawa impaled on its two fingered claws.

"Shit! This can't be happening!" I ran toward the Hollow, leaving the two idiots behind me screaming, "Wait! Mamori! The Senkaimon's that way!"

I ignored them. Why should we run? The reason we go to school is to fight these things. One of them with a bunch of five-year and six-year student shinigami around it isn't going to be difficult. It just caught Kanizawa off guard. Yeah, that was it.

After hopping across roofs and dodging signs, I finally reached Hisagi and the other six-year, who was lying on his side covered in blood. Another Hollow had its back turned to me, so I took the opportunity to cut its head from behind. But what I didn't know at the time was that this Hollow… wasn't the only one. Another huge one with six pairs of long claws that ended in razor sharp points knocked me away, using its other hands to attack my face. I unsheathed my sword and raised it, attempting to block the claws, but the feeble blade of the katana that lacked the strength of reiatsu broke in two as I hit the ground from the impact.

"Crap! Now what?" I threw away the hilt and raised my hands, "Hado 31, Shakkaho!" A shot of fire flew from my palms and hit him in the forehead, but it merely rubbed the spot and lashed out again. If my kido and my sword were now ineffective… what the hell could I do? The claws closed in on my face again, and this time… I didn't have a way to fight back. I raised my arms as a shield and awaited the pain, but I heard a clang instead. Slowly, I lowered my arms to see Hisagi blocking the claws, but the other hand reached around and sliced through his face by his right eye, creating three line lines of blood that soon poured over his face.

"Hisagi!"

"Go back to the Senkaimon! Now!"

"No, I can't just leave!"

"Yes you can! Just get the hell outta here! Your katana is broken! You have no way to fight so just leave!"

"But… but my friends…"

"Should be back on the other side of the Senkaimon by now! So just go! You don't need to be worried about them!"

"What about you! You and Aoga can't handle this alone either! They're huge and there's two of them. It'd take five of us to at least tackle one—"

"Will you shut up and get going! I don't care about statistics! It's my responsibility to get you all safe back in the Soul Society!" He slashed at the claws as they came back to attack the both of us. He got one of the fingers, but it just grew back.

"Damn, high speed regeneration. Agh! I'm not gonna die like this, and neither are you!" He lunged at the beetle-like creature, but it was faster, aiming right for Hisagi's face again. There was nothing I could do—I knew it, and Hisagi knew it. But… I couldn't just leave, nor could I bear myself to watch Hisagi protect me when I was perfectly capable if I just had a zanpakutou. And now, there was no way he could avoid those claws… and there was no way I could stop it either.

I awaited the blood-curdling sound of flesh ripping, but it never happened. I simply saw three other figures blocking the three hands that had attempted to kill Hisagi—Renji, Kira, and Momo. Hisagi appeared to be just as shocked as I was, "…You three!"

"Renji! Kira! Momo! What are you three—?"

"Are you okay, Mamori?" Momo interrupted me. I sighed, "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Please forgive us… for disobeying your orders," Kira said to Hisagi, while Renji added, "And don't overlook that we're savin' your ass, here!"

"_Great sovereign!_ _Mask of blood and flesh, all creation, flutter of wings, ye who bears the name of Man! Inferno and pandemonium, the sea barrier surges, march on to the south! _Hado 31, _Shakkaho!_" Momo yelled, and the blast of red fire sent smoke everywhere.

"Yeah!" Kira yelled; I just groaned, "Oh no. Now you just made it angry."

"…No… It's no good." Hisagi muttered as the smoke dissipated—revealing a whole gathering of Hollows.

"I already tried that," I said, groaning again. This was just perfect.

"…no way…" The three others exclaimed, amazed by how many Hollows there were.

"Im-impossible… no… no… I don't want to die…" Kira stared in horror and screamed, much to my annoyance. The Hollow opened its mouth, but instead of coming down on us, an insanely long sword pierced it right through the mouth and destroyed it and all those behind it.

"What the hell?" I asked, looking at Hisagi.

"Hyaa. Found an awful mess o' them, din'cha?"

"Sorry to keep you all waiting. You did request backup, did you not?"

We all turned to see who had arrived. A tall man with a mess of short brown hair and glasses wearing a haori smiled at us, while another man with short silver hair and a peevish carefree grin held his sword.

"Bu-Bu-But you are…! 5th Squad Captain Aizen…! And… Lieutenant Ichimaru!" Hisagi exclaimed, obviously in disbelief.

The Captain proceeded to pat Momo's head and move forward to the Hollows, "…You all performed admirably. I'm sure it must have been frightening… but it's over now."

"The Cap'n an' I can take it from here. Why don't y'all rest fer a bit an' let us handle these?"

"Yes sir!" They bowed a bit and retreated, Hisagi and I following them. I ripped off part of the sleeve of my hakama and turned it into long strips. Hisagi eyed them, "What are you doing?"

"You're the one who's risking losing an eye with those wounds. Might as well patch it up as best we can at this point to stop the bleeding." I wrapped them around his head and finished bandaging them up nicely. I was proud of myself—first time I had ever helped bandage a wound and it turned out well. Even he agreed. The shinigami finished in no time, and soon returned to the Senkaimon. They promised that they would alert the fourth squad to have us all looked over and then send us home.

Five hell butterflies flew out of the gate and found each of us, but Renji, Kira, and Momo were busy talking, so they didn't notice. I stepped through first and was readily greeted on the other side by a shinigami that was part of the fourth squad. Apparently, Captain Aizen didn't have to alert them after all.

A few days later, I was still postponed from my studies until they were sure I had 'healed'. Healed? Why? I hadn't gotten hurt. In fact, Hisagi was the one who had taken all the blows for me. I wasn't physically hurt, but the knowledge that Hisagi had been injured due to my incompetence really irked me. So, I decided to confront my zanpakutou spirit again. Since that incident, I finally realized what it was that I wanted to protect.

…Finally!

"So, have you figured out what it is you want to protect? Or is this just another futile visit, child?" The dragon asked, once again curled up on the platform. I gave a short little bow and replied, "I know now."

"Really? So, are you going to tell me what it is? Or are you just going to stand there and stare at me all day?" He whipped his tail and bared his teeth in impatience. I sighed, "What I want to protect… I want to protect those that I love. Those close to me. My friends, the people I live with… all of them. I want to protect each and every one of them… and… and I am willing to risk my life to save every last one of them."

As soon as I finished, his nostrils flared and his mane stood on end. He vaulted into the air from where he sat, climbing higher and higher until he looked extremely small, and then flying back down to the platform… smiling. Actually… he _was _smaller. His head was now about the length of my foreleg, making him a much more reasonable size. He floated over by where I was standing, and curled around me quickly, "Thank you so much, Nazeka. You finally figured it out and released me from that state. I owe you my loyalty. My name is Syugoryuu." His voice was different too, more like a young man than a booming voice—much kinder and happier.

"Syugoryuu," I repeated, taking that name to heart. He released me and stood across the platform, whipping his tail around like a happy dog.

"Yes. When you wake up, you'll find your zanpakutou sitting in your lap. Like I said, I owe you my loyalty, and you shall have it. You are now my master until the end of your time. Hopefully, you will be much nicer than my last one."

"You had another master?"

"Oh yes. He wasn't kind at all. He preferred using his own strength rather than borrowing mine."

"So… you've had many masters?"

"I've had four. They've all died as a shinigami. I pass on to another shinigami that I find worthy enough to be my master—if they will learn and listen—about a century later."

"And you chose me."

"Yes. I chose you the moment you were born. My spiritual pressure allowed you to see spirits—to see Hollows too. I've been waiting for you to break that kido for a long time I must say. 20 years… I don't think anyone else has taken that long."

"Great… wait, so are there other zanpakutou that pass on to new masters?" I sat down on the center of the tower, and Syugoryuu did likewise, wrapping his tail around him like a dog.

"Oh, only dragon-like zanpakutou like me. Hyourinmaru, Ryujin Jakka, and I are the only ones. It's just our nature."

"Ryujin Jakka is Head Captain Yamamoto's zanpakutou."

"Yes, and he has never had to switch masters. Yamamoto founded the Seireitei, so he's been the Head Captain for thousands of years."

"Wow. And the name Hyourinmaru… I've heard it before."

"Yes, I said it through you. That bastard always wants it extremely cold, and Ryujin Jakka always wants it extremely hot. Can't they just settle on lukewarm? That's why it's spring here. But… you see that gate over there? The one that you can't go through? Have you ever seen beyond it?"

"Yeah. It's all covered in ice."

"Exactly. That's Hyourinmaru's land, where he resides inside his master's soul."

"So… the gates are connected? Does that mean that his master's soul and my soul are connected too?"

"Yep."

"That's so weird!"

"Well… the thing is, we don't usually like to stray too far from each other. We're all of similar kin, so we typically stick together. This is the first time I've ever found a soul that I liked down in the World of the Living."

"Hmm… so, what does that have to do with the fact that our souls are connected?"

"Because you've already met Hyourinmaru's new master. That short little boy with the white hair. Damn, he needs to keep his reiatsu under control. After all, his whole house is covered in ice most of the time we visit. Sometimes, I think Hyourinmaru's just showing off."

"Toushirou is Hyourinmaru's master!"

"You bet. Now, what if I said that it was Ukitake? Would you be creeped out?"

"Yeah! His soul being connected to mine is so… so weird."

"But you're perfectly fine with Toushirou being connected?"

"Yeah… I find it strange. I mean… why him?"

"That can be explained. Like I said before, we don't really like to be separated. So, we connect the souls of our master's to make things easier. Ryujin Jakka dislikes this idea. He's the only one against it, and I think it'd be a bad idea to connect your soul and Ol' Man Yama's soul together. Anyway, since your souls are connected, that means you have a special bond, whether you want one or not.

"Well, what if two enemies were connected in their souls? That wouldn't go over very well. The inner worlds of those two would surely collapse. So, to prevent that from happening, when the two souls are connected, they're drawn to one another. That's why it doesn't bother you. If it were two guys, which has happened before, they feel more like brothers… but as for two members of the opposite gender…"

"We grow to love each other?"

"That's a good way to put it."

"Kinda puts a damper on the whole experience now that I know."

Syugoryuu grinned, "Yeah, but Hyourinmaru doesn't like to tell his masters inside things about our existence… so Toushirou won't know. It'll be a one-way experience, but I'm sure it'll be fun."

"Interesting way of putting things…"

"My bad."

"So, are you _always_ like this?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know… hmm… when you had the kido on you, you were kinda scary."

"I'm not like that, if that's what you're asking. Hyourinmaru on the other hand… He's loyal, but he kinda acts like that all the time. As for Ryujin Jakka… he's a total bastard."

"Well, I'll keep that in mind…"

"It's about time for you to be waking up."

"Really?"

"We'll talk later. Goodbye for now, Nazeka."

"Thanks, Syugoryuu. Oh, wait. You told me that I'd wish you were still under the kido one time. Why?"

"We'll talk about that later."

"Aww, but—"

"_Goodbye_."

I instantly woke up, the sun setting in the distance. There was so much more I wanted to ask Syugoryuu, but I supposed I would have to wait.

"Oh! My zanpakutou!" I looked down, and sure enough—in my lap was a long black sheath. In it was a black and white zanpakutou with teal gray cording on the hilt and a crescent moon bronze guard. I picked it up; it was quite light for something that looked so heavy. I supposed all zanpakutou felt like that. I sheathed it and slid it under my obi belt, extremely excited to show Ukitake. Almost forgetting to take off my sandals, I ran across the wood and over to his office. Ukitake wasn't there, but Kaien was, so I let my energy out on him.

"Kaien! Kai—"

"That's Kaien-_dono_. And you shouldn't be running around. You're still recovering."

"Nuh-uh. I can call you Kaien again! And I don't care if I'm supposed to be recovering! I didn't even get scratched! Anyway, look! I finally got it!" I held up my sheathed weapon for him to see. He stared at it for a second, and then he finally laughed, "Look at that! Congrats, Nazeka."

"That was a delayed reaction, Kaien."

"Sorry. Anyway, what's its name?"

"His name is Syugoryuu."

"I'm guessing you're looking for the captain?"

"Yeah."

"He's in bed right now. He had another attack this morning."

"What! Why don't you people tell me these things! You did this same thing when Rukia got here you bastard!"

"Bastard, am I? I oughta—" he sighed, "Look, you can go see him, but you can't spaz out around him, okay?"

"Thanks, Kaien!" I ran off to his room after putting the sheath back under my belt. Kaien called out behind me, "Don't you dare freak out around Ukitake-taicho! I'll make sure to take that away if you do!"

"I know, I know!"

**Okay, so I know it's a bit chunky, but I had to fit in a lot of information in one chapter. WOW! TWELVE PAGES!**

**Anyway, I also know that technically, that incident with Hisagi happened during their first year, but I needed to change that a bit so it fit with the story. SORRY TO ANYONE WHO IS A TOTAL ACCURACY NAZI! MY BAD!**

**Anyway, tomorrow's exams are Latin and Algebra I Honors, so I have to hit the books and finish up and studying tomorrow early and then after Thursday, I'll be free to update! Wish me luck and see you then!**

**~SaiyokuRiku~**


	6. Syugoryuu's Anger Toward Hyourinmaru

**Shinigami Academy Dormitories**

**April 3****rd****, 1951**

"Hey, need anything?" I knocked on the door, "Oh and I talked to Ukitake. He said that it was perfectly fine with you comin' over to see me every once in a while."

Toushirou turned around, holding one of his new hakamas, his face twisted in horror, "Nazeka, how'd you get in here? This is the boys' dormitory. Girls aren't allowed."

"Well… I'm a sixth year, and I'm kinda under the supervision of Ukitake, so no one really gets too uptight with me. And I told them that I just needed to see how you were doing and I was gonna be outta here in ten minutes at the most. Any more than that, and I told them they could come and get me if they really wanted to."

"You're really taking that for granted, aren't you? I can't believe you got away with that."

"Maybe, and I can certainly believe it. Anyway, like I asked before, do you need anything?"

"Uh… no. I didn't have much to bring anyway, so there really isn't anything you can do," He set down his hakama in the closet next to the rolled up bed sheets. I leaned on the doorway and scoured the room. I'd never lived in a dormitory before, but I had lived in an apartment most of my life, so I suppose that wasn't much of a difference.

"Y'know, I've met someone who looked a lot like you before, in the World of the Living. Strange…" I suddenly blurted out. He really did remind me of someone I had met. I don't remember when, but I definitely remember meeting him.

"That was sudden. And I seriously doubt you've met someone who looked like me. I mean, how many guys are out there with spiky white hair and teal eyes. It's not exactly common you know," He shut the closet door and leaned up against it.

"I really did. Except… well… I can't remember much about him. I've forgotten a lot about my life in the World of the Living now. Guess that's normal, huh?"

"Yeah. Most people forget within days. I'm surprised you remembered that."

"Me too. Anyway, I should get outta here before my time is up, so I just have one more question for you."

"What's that?"

"Are you excited for tomorrow?"

"Hell no."

"I figured as much."

"Then why did you ask?"

"Dunno."

"You are so confusing sometimes."

"Welcome to my world."

"What?"

"Bye!" I turned and left, trotting down the stairs. He stuck his head out the door, "You are so random!"

"I know! See you at school tomorrow! Don't forget, you can come visit me any time you want!" I ran down the hall and through the different passageways until I reached the entrance. I nodded to the two guys guarding the door, "Thanks!" and ran off.

It wasn't long before I heard footsteps behind me. I glanced behind me to see Kaien behind me, waving his hands, "Hey, Nazeka!"

"Kaien? What are you doing here?" I stopped and waited for him.

"What the hell are you doing over here? One: this is the boys' dormitory; and two: we had training half an hour ago! I told you specifically last night that I was going to privately train you like I did with Rukia at 10:30 today! It's already 11 o' clock!"

"Oh… well, I can explain. You know that kid that I was always hanging—"

"—C'mon!" He grabbed my arm and pulled me in the opposite direction, "I don't wanna hear any excuses!"

"B-but—"

"No buts!" He dragged me away from the dormitories and through the Seireitei. We passed Renji on the way there—he was applying for positions on the different squads so that way he could move immediately into one when he graduates. I was going to, but apparently Captain Yamamoto had plans for me… yippee.

"Nazeka… what are you—?"

"—Can't talk, sorry Renji! Apparently I have some business with Kaien, so he's insisting that I head over there now."

"O-okay…?"

"Sorry!" I was dragged all the way to the 13th Squad's training grounds, where Kaien and Rukia usually train, along with some of the newbie members. He dropped me down onto the grass beside the dirt pad where the training commences.

"There was no need to drag me the whole way. I would've come—"

"You would not."

"You didn't let me finish. I would've come… eventually."

"Well, now it's eventually. So, time to train. Ready yourself."

"Wait… I don't even have my zanpakutou with me. It's in the barracks."

"Too bad."

"What!"

"What if you lose it during battle? What if it breaks? What if something happens to it to cause it to become worthless? You don't know what's out there or what could happen. So, since you don't have it with you, you'll be training without it."

"Kaien… you suck."

"Is that anyway to treat a lieutenant?"

"You're not _my_ lieutenant. I don't have to respect you as much as I would if you were."

"That doesn't matter. I'm still your elder, and you're a shinigami student, so now that you're training to become a shinigami, I have tons of authority over you."

"Yeah right."

"I do! Now, get out on that field!"

"ARGH! I don't wanna!"

"TOO BAD!"

**13****th**** Squad Barracks**

**July 20****th****, 1951**

"Nazeka!"

I heard Ukitake calling my name from around the corner and immediately sheathed my zanpakutou, quickly wiping the sweat from my forehead before he came into view.

"Yes? Oh, and I'm glad to see you are doing well today."

"There's someone here to see you."

"Oh? Who?"

"This is some place you've got."

I looked over to Ukitake's left to see Toushirou standing there with his arms folded, clearly uninterested. _Wonderful, he comes over to my place for the first time and he greets me with a scowl. I just wanna know what the hell kind of relationship do we have? Are we friends or aren't we? If we are, then he had better wipe that scowl off his face already or I'll get rid of it permanently._ I felt a vein pop in my forehead and tried to pass it off with a smile, but his attitude isn't exactly the greatest… and definitely not the greatest for making a first impression with Ukitake.

"Hey Toushirou! Enjoying summer vacation?"

He gave me a 'you-already-know-the-damn-answer' look, so I just ignored the silence, "You _are_ feeling well today, aren't you, Ukitake?"

"Yes, which means I need to go help Kaien with the paperwork. Good to meet you Toushirou-kun," he patted Toushirou on the head—who did not look happy with the suffix he was appointed—and turned around. I smirked, "Well then, tell Kyouraku I said hi!"

He froze and glanced over his shoulder, "What? Why? What ever made you bring that up?"

I raised an eyebrow, "You know exactly what I'm talking about. If you promise me you won't drink too much today, I'll tell Kaien, Kiyone, and Sentarou that you aren't feeling well anymore and that you requested not to be disturbed, okay?"

He grinned, "Okay, okay. I'll make sure to tell Kyouraku you said hi. See you two later," he left quickly, leaving me and Toushirou alone… who was still scowling.

"Rule number one—"

"You're kidding, there're rules?"

"Let me finish. Rule number one: _no_ scowling. That includes you. Rule number two…"

"What?"

"…You have to say hi to your friend."

"What friend?"

I frowned and hit him on the head.

"Ow. Jeez, I was just kidding," he moaned as he rubbed his head. I smiled, "I know. That's for your obnoxious behavior around the Captain."

"I wasn't obnoxious."

"Oh yes you were. Anyway, what'dya think?" I opened my arms out wide.

"Of what?"

"Of the bushes. No, of the frickin' barracks you moron."

"Who's the moron? I happen to recall that you were failing almost every class in school."

"'Were' is the key word. I have A's now," I poked his head.

"Yeah, but they're still on your permanent record. Anyway, I already told you what I thought of this place. That was the first thing I said you idiot," he folded his arms.

"I am _not_ an idiot. Besides, you used sarcasm, so I don't know if you mean it or not."

"Fine, then let me rephrase what I said. This place is huge. You really live here?"

"Yes."

"And you have this whole wing to yourself?"

"Yes. Rukia would've moved in here, but she resides at the Kuchiki house with her brother, Kuchiki-taicho."

"I didn't ask for all the details."

I scowled, "Do you have to act like that? Your attitude sucks."

"Well excuse me."

I wandered over to the porch outside my room and sat down, setting down my zanpakutou next to me, "Anyway, come and sit. How do you like school so far? I haven't seen you for a while, since we've both been busy."

He joined me and sighed, "I have to admit… it's definitely different from what I expected."

"In a good or bad way?"

"…Good."

"See! I knew you would like it!" I hugged him, and I could feel him stiffen beneath me, "Okay! Okay! Get off me!" He pushed me off and scowled, "Don't _ever_ do that again."

"Okay, okay. So, what about friends? Have you made any?"

"Yeah. His name is Kusaka Soujirou. He's in my class and we're… we're really good friends."

I could sense some hesitation behind his words, so I asked, "What's the matter?"

He sat there for some time, staring at the ground; and for the first time… I noticed that he looked older. He may not have grown any taller, but his face had thinned out and some of his bangs had disappeared. _Lucky, _I thought, _you at least get to age a little bit…_

He continued, "I think… I don't know. He doesn't seem the same… Ever since we obtained our zanpakutou, he's been acting a little differently."

"Well… maybe he just needs some time and then he'll go back to being normal. I'm sure he still wants to be friends with you."

"Yeah…"

"But… hey, you got your zanpakutou, right? What's his name?"

"I'm not telling."

I stood up, "What!" _No biggie. I already know… but he can't know that. It'd be too weird._

He looked away, "You heard me. You shouldn't give out the name of your zanpakutou left and right, you know. So, I'm not telling you. You can find out if you ever fight me."

"Fight you? How about… when I'm in battle with you? Not against you. Why would I wanna fight my best friend?"

He looked up at me, "…Best… friend?"

"Of course! You were my first friend here, and you're the closest friend I have! Doesn't that qualify you for being my best friend?"

He looked back down at the dirt, "I… I never thought about it."

"Gee, thanks."

"That's not what I meant," he mumbled. I smiled and sat down again, looking up at the dark gray sky. It was surprisingly gloomy for a summer evening, but with the recent heat spike, it would be normal for summer storms.

"Hey, it looks like it's gonna rain," I mentioned, and he rolled his eyes, "Yeah, sure. The sky was cloudless earlier."

"Summer storms are funny like that."

"I still don't believe—huh?" He looked up as a raindrop hit him square in between his eyes. More and more followed before it started pouring, with thunder rolling in from the distance. Toushirou groaned, "Great… how am I supposed to get back to the dormitories now? It's already late enough."

I took off my shoes and put them on the porch where they wouldn't get wet, "Why, were you planning on leaving? Anyway, since you'll get drenched if you go now, why don't we go inside? It'll be a lot less humid and it won't be as loud from the rain."

He looked at the corner where he had arrived from, but seemed to have second thoughts when he took off his shoes and put them next to mine. I picked up my zanpakutou and smiled, "All right. C'mon, let's go inside!" I opened up the door and quickly went to the closet and pulled out two cushions for us to sit on. My room was practically bare, so there was no where else to sit.

I set the cushions down in the middle of the floor and then placed my zanpakutou against the wall in the corner of the room nearest the door. I heard the door close shut and I turned around, "Well, whaddya think? This is my room. The other rooms are just through those sliding doors. We can stay here until the rain goes away." I saw his cheeks go a little red when I said 'my room'.

"This… this is your room?"

"Yeah. Gotta problem? Look, if it makes you uncomfortable, I've seen your room, so it's no big deal if you're in mine. Besides, I have nothing but my clothes, bed, and some everyday stuff in here. Nothing really personal. It _shouldn't_ make you uncomfortable."

"Uncomfortable? W-why would I be uncomfortable?"

"You're blushing."

A look of horror passed over his face and he quickly sat down on one of the cushions, "…was not…" he muttered.

Lightning flashed outside the door and I could hear the rain get harder. I moaned, "Just perfect. It looks like it'll last all night."

"Looks like I'm not getting to the dormitories tonight after all."

"Nope. Well, you're just lucky we're in the vacant wing and the rooms all have beds, so you can spend the night in one of them."

"What about food?"

"We'll just have to wait until tomorrow. No biggie. It'll just be like a training exercise in case something worse than this happens." I opened up my closet again as another peal of thunder sounded, "Okay, I'm sure you wanna get out of those wet clothes."

"Huh?"

"You were sitting on the edge of the porch for some time, so your hakama and tabi are soaked," I reached into my closet and pulled out one of my white jinbei style pants and handed it to him, "Here. Wait one second," I reached back in and pulled out a jinbei shirt, "Here we are. Tada. I hope they fit though."

He took it and held it up, "Thanks… I'll be right back." He stood up and went into the neighboring room while I changed as well. I took off my uniform and changed into my own jinbei pants and shirt quickly… before he even thought about coming back into my room. I slid into the bathroom and quickly wiped off my face since I had been training earlier; then I went back into the room and sat down on my cushion.

It wasn't long before Toushirou opened the door. I smiled, "Come on in."

"Sorry, but I'm a little tired. Earlier today I… well, I'm just tired. Is that okay?"

"Sure. The bed is in the closet. Need any help?" I offered.

"No. I'm okay. Sorry about all this." He scratched the back of his head.

"It's absolutely no problem at all. I'll see ya in the morning then!" I grinned, picking up his cushion and mine and putting them back in the closet. "Yeah," he nodded.

He shut the door; but I wasn't ready to go to bed quite yet, so I peeked outside just as a flash of lighting was followed by thunder. I sighed, "I was certainly not expecting that today. Oh well… this turn of events turned out to be quite interesting."

I watched the rain get harder and harder for a few more minutes before I decided to go to bed; and as soon as my bed was set up, I switched off the lights and went to sleep.

"Well, it's been a while."

I groaned and opened my eyes, feeling the rock of the tower against my back, and looking up at the mix of cherry, plum, and peach blossoms. Beneath one of the cherry blossoms was Syugoryuu, wrapped around the base of the trunk waving his tail. He yawned and scratched himself behind the ears like a dog before speaking, "What's up?"

I narrowed my eyes, "…er… nothing right now…"

"Wrong."

"Huh?"

"The sky is up!" He grinned and laughed… but I smacked my forehead. _…What is wrong with my zanpakutou spirit?_

I stood and frowned, "Surely there's another reason for bringing me here than to listen to your corny jokes."

Next thing I knew, he was two inches away from me and growling, his teeth bared, "Now that is no way to treat your zanpakutou spirit! And that _wasn't_ corny!"

"There _is_ another reason, isn't there? Then stop wasting my sleeping time and tell me what it is!" I demanded, and then added, "And yes, it was corny. That was _extremely_ corny."

He relaxed and quieted himself, lowering his lips to cover his fangs; and then he pushed me forward using his muzzle towards the front of the temple. "I have something to show you."

"What?"

"You'll see."

We passed the front entrance—which was where I thought he was taking me—but instead of stopping there, he started pushing me towards where the huge stone gates were: the only thing keeping everything in and the only thing separating my inner world… from Toushirou's inner world. But instead of the gates, there was simply a big gaping hole from where they had been.

"What…? Where did they go?" I asked, and Syugoryuu finally stopped pushing me, responding, "It's gone. It'll be gone until one of you die. Ever since Toushirou gained his zanpakutou, his bridge between his inner world and himself has grown stronger. Your bridge has done the same; and now that both of you have succeeded in gaining us, your inner worlds have been officially connected. This means he can enter your inner world, and you can enter his."

"Wow. So, does he know about this?"

"He's about to find out because I know that Hyourinmaru has called Toushirou here too."

"Wait… so why tell him this stuff when we're asleep? He's just gonna think it's a dream."

"That's why you're here. You can tell him in the morning that you had the same dream and you can explain any more questions he has."

"Thanks," I muttered. He walked over to the edge of the gate and roared, lifting his head up to the sky as he did, and it sounded different. We waited for a few minutes before a great shimmering light blue dragon appeared made of ice, with two great wings on his back and no feet—he just used his wings to get around. On his back was Toushirou, who jumped down onto the ice on his side and looked through the gate, extremely surprised at what he saw, "Nazeka!"

I grinned, "Hey. What's up?" I saw Syugoryuu open his mouth to speak, but I cut him off before he had a chance, "_Don't_ answer that."

He narrowed his eyes, but changed his demeanor quickly when he turned to Hyourinmaru. He gave a great toothy grin and laughed, "Hey there, Hyourinmaru. How're you?"

"Perfectly fine. I hope your new master's treating you well," He replied in a great booming voice that could've surely cracked the ice. Syugoryuu smirked, "Yeah, she is, but she's making fun of my jokes."

"Syugoryuu, you were never one for comedy."

"Shut up!" He growled, raising his neck, but Hyourinmaru ignored the challenge, lowering his head to get a better look at me, "It's a pleasure to meet you. I am Hyourinmaru, Toushirou's zanpakutou spirit. You must be Nazeka. I hope you're prepared to handle Syugoryuu."

"I'm pretty sure I can handle him," I laughed, giving a slight bow to the great ice dragon. Syugoryuu lowered his head as well to look at Toushirou, "Hey there Toushirou. I'm Syugoryuu, Nazeka's zanpakutou spirit. We're all here today to explain one major thing: the reason why we're able to communicate between our master's inner worlds. You're the only one in the dark, so we thought we'd all come here to explain it to you."

"Hyourinmaru could've told me, so why did all of you have to come?" Toushirou scowled, but Syugoryuu attempted to ignore his attitude, "Because Nazeka needs some extra explaining too. Anyway, let's begin."

He began to explain everything I had heard earlier, so I wasn't paying too much attention, but every now and then, Hyourinmaru would add little things that I had also heard from Syugoryuu. It wasn't until later that this involved me, "Nazeka."

"Hmm?" I asked, immediately paying attention. Syugoryuu continued, "You and Toushirou are the only ones that can go into each other's worlds. Not even Hyourinmaru and I can go into each other's. It would cause your inner worlds to collapse, and also—"

"—we can't have Syugoryuu coming from out of your inner world. Especially on one of his rampages. It's not so much as me as it is him," Hyourinmaru interrupted.

"So… this would be one of the reasons you said that at times I would wish you were still under that seal, right, Syugoryuu?" I asked, and he nodded. _Great… I wonder how often those 'rampages' happen._

"Anyway, you can go into each other's worlds any time you want. There's just one little catch to it."

"What?" Toushirou and I simultaneously asked.

"Say Nazeka left her inner world and entered Toushirou's. Then Toushirou's reiatsu would sky rocket out of control and leave Nazeka's reiryoku completely depleted. Likewise for Toushirou leaving his inner world."

"In other words… It's dangerous for both of us?" I suggested.

"Extremely in specific circumstances. Anyway, that's it. You guys can try it if you want, and it won't be a big deal since you're not in battle or anything, so go ahead."

I looked at Toushirou, who caught my gaze. We both shook our heads, "I don't think I wanna try it… even if we are just asleep."

"Suit yourself. You guys can go back to sleep now. See ya later, Toushirou!" Syugoryuu waved his tail.

"Good night, Toushirou. See ya in the morning," I told him. He nodded, "Likewise." He turned and disappeared, obviously leaving his inner world. I bowed to Hyourinmaru, hugged Syugoryuu around the neck—which he didn't seem to appreciate, but dealt with it—and began to turn and leave, but I stopped when Syugoryuu growled at Hyourinmaru.

"So I hear that you have _two_ masters now. What the hell is that about!"

"The other boy needed a zanpakutou spirit. He begged for one before he even entered the academy."

"So you thought you could just let him have one, even when you already had a master! You bastard! What the hell is wrong with you! Don't you even care about Toushirou! Do you know what will happen now! You know perfectly well the laws of the Soul Society! No two zanpakutou can be the same! Now that there are two, Central 46 will surely make them fight to the death or kill one of them! You're going to be responsible for making those two boys suffer, and they're best friends too! Damn you! Damn it, damn it, damn it!"

Syugoryuu roared and reared back, slamming himself against an invisible barrier that separated the two worlds; it shocked him, and he fell to the ground, still growling. He got up and did it again, and again, and again, until he couldn't move any more and was just lying on the ground.

"Syugoryuu!" I yelled, running to his side and kneeling by his head, stroking his burnt fur and mane in between his horns. He whimpered and looked up at Hyourinmaru, forcing out, "You don't care about your masters. You're a traitor to both of them. You don't deserve to be a zanpakutou spirit, and you're not fit to be the great ice dragon that you are!"

Hyourinmaru looked at him sadly and left, leaving me and Syugoryuu alone. I stroked his head softly until he had the strength to get up. He looked at me sadly, "Your friend is going to suffer… and I suppose you're going to have to be the one to comfort him when he does. Don't abandon him, and never let anything separate you two; because he is going to need you very soon. He's going to need you to help him amend the hurt that his own zanpakutou enforced on him."

"Don't worry. I will stay by Toushirou's side and protect him. That's one of the reasons I could hear your name."

He smirked softly, "That's good to hear. But you can't protect him from everything. Unfortunately, that's all I can tell you right now. We're just going to have to see how this plays out. I need to rest now, so you're going to have to leave; oh, and don't worry, my physical state doesn't affect your spiritual or your physical state. I'll see you later then, master," He stretched out and spun up into the air, twisting his tail around to push him into the air. He disappeared into the clouds, and I did the same—disappearing from my own inner world, and falling back asleep.


	7. Learn Your Shikai

"Nazeka. Nazeka."

The voice continued to get clearer and clearer until I could finally tell who was calling my name. I opened up my eyes and waited until the blurriness faded. In front of me was Toushirou shaking my shoulder… with his jinbei shirt hanging open. My face burned as I sat up, quickly ran a hand through my hair, and made sure that my shirt was shut tight.

"W-What is it, Toushirou? What time is it?" I rubbed my eyes and quickly glanced out the window. It was still pouring down rain, so it was hard to tell if it was morning yet or not.

"Nazeka. I had the strangest dream. You and your zanpakutou spirit were in it. Syugoryuu, right?"

"Oh yeah. Toushirou, that wasn't a dream. It really did happen."

"But even the part about… you know… us being drawn together?"

"Well—" I began to say yes, but I thought about it for a second. Syugoryuu said that the experience would be one-way… but now that he told him too, it would feel more like we're being forced to love each other. _Just say no. That's all you have to do. Say no, _"I don't remember hearing that."

"So… I just dreamed that?"

"Yeah. I guess so," I grinned and playfully punched him in the arm, "What, did you just dream something of your inner wishes?"

I watched as his face changed to three different shades of red, "W-What are you—I mean, why the heck would I—No!"

I fell back onto the bed laughing, "I was just kidding. But damn, you seem to be serious!" _But… maybe I am too…_

"You jerk!" He smacked me in the head and stood up, fixing his shirt and going back into the other room. I called after him, "I'm sorry! I was just messing around! Sheesh…"

I stood up, looked outside again—the rain had slowed to just a mere sprinkle… finally!—and I could finally tell that it was sometime early in the morning, but now I was wide awake, so there was no going back to sleep. I changed into my normal wear—which was basically a black and red yukata—and rolled up my bed, tucking it back inside the closet. I took one more glance outside to see that the rain had stopped entirely.

"Yes! Hey, Toushirou! The rain stopped! That's good, right?"

"Yeah, it means I can go home now," He muttered, walking in the room with the clothes he had borrowed in his hands, "Here. I oughta get back. I'll see you later, then."

I took the clothes and he opened the door, but I grabbed his shoulder, "Damn, are you still upset about what I said? Jeez, I was just kidding. No need to take it so personally. Here, we can go eat now that the rain has stopped, so why don't we go together?"

"Thanks, but I need to go. Thank you for everything. I really mean it. Goodbye."

He shut the door behind him and I could hear his footsteps disappear outside, leaving me alone in my room. I stood there with my clothes still in my hands… wondering why he had been so eager to go back home.

**Shinigami Academy**

**September 26****th****, 1951**

"Hey, Nazeka!"

I heard my name being called and turned to the direction from which it came. Renji was standing there, waving his hand.

"Hey Renji! How's it going?" I asked when I ran up to him. He smirked, "Fine my short little friend," he ruffled my hair, "Ready for graduation?"

"You bet! I can't wait! I really wanna be in a squad already!" I fixed my hair.

"Where'd you apply? I applied to the fifth, sixth, eleventh, and thirteenth squads."

"I applied to the seventh, eighth, tenth, and thirteenth. But, wow, you applied to the eleventh! Damn, are you sure you're cut out for it?"

"Like hell I am! Why didn't you apply?"

"Because I know very well that I'm not qualified for that squad."

"Whatever. I think I'm qualified enough. Anyway, some kid wanted me to tell you something."

"Who? What?"

"Um, this white haired kid… he's a first year. Anyway, he wanted me to tell you that he wanted to talk to you during lunch today. He said he'd be waiting for you with a friend of his out in the courtyard."

"Really? Okay, thanks Renji," I turned around, but he grabbed my shoulder, smirking again, "So, does this little first year have a crush on you or something?" He started laughing, but I turned around and gave him the sweetest smile I could muster… right before kicking him hard in the shin. He stammered and crouched, holding his leg, "Ow! Damn it Nazeka!"

"Don't make fun of Toushirou in front of me, Renji. Next time you do, I'll make sure to kick you somewhere else," I said evilly, and his eyes widened. I turned around and waved, "See ya later, Renji!"

I ran down the hall and out into the next building—where our zanjutsu class was. I was almost late—the bell rang about a minute after I had arrived (Unfortunately for Renji… he was late). The instructor entered, made a small speech about our zanpakutou, and then explained that we would be learning how to unleash our shikai. _Yes! _I thought, _Finally! I've been wanting to do this for forever!_

He told us to sit and talk with our zanpakutou spirits, and once everyone had talked to them, he would pair us into groups and we would spar with each other… in front of everyone. _Wait… but then everyone here would see… that's so unfair! What if we wanted to keep it a secret! ARGH!_

We all sat in different places, and commenced the talking with our zanpakutou part. I closed my eyes, took my zanpakutou out of my belt, laid it on my lap, and focused. It wasn't long before I was taken into my inner world, this time out in the grassy plain.

"Hey there, Nazeka. This is unusual… you came to visit me during school hours. So, what do you need?" Syugoryuu whipped his tail and smiled, standing up out of the tall grass.

"We're learning how to unleash our shikai."

"Oh… that's what you guys are doing. Hmph, did the instructor say it wasn't going to be easy?"

"How so?"

"Well, you know how with learning bankai, you must defeat us and suppress us to bend to your will?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you just have to beat a challenge we assign you first."

"You're kidding."

"No, I'm not," he grinned even wider, showing off his huge fangs.

"Don't tell me I have to endure more of your jokes."

"No, no, something much harder than that," his grin faded and he suddenly became serious, "Every master of mine has had to go through this test. Only one of them failed and died. Let's see if you can beat it."

"Well, what is it then?"

He looked up at the sky and smiled again, "You have to ride me."

"Wait, that's it?"

"I'm not finished. You have to ride me when I'm on a rampage."

"That still doesn't sound too bad."

He picked me up by the neck of my kosode and flew me to the gate separating Toushirou's inner world and mine. He roared, and Hyourinmaru quickly came to the gate. Immediately, Syugoryuu's nostrils flared, his back arched, he dug his claws into the ground, and he began to growl furiously. _He's still so angry at Hyourinmaru, that just seeing him pisses him off._

"Nazeka, he goes on rampages often and easily. He'll attack anyone, even you," Hyourinmaru explained, obviously glad that he was safe on that side of the gate.

"Yeah, thanks."

I watched Syugoryuu carefully; his pupils dilated until they covered even the whites of his eyes, his mane stood on end, and his growling grew fiercer and fiercer in each passing second. He glanced at me, and before I knew it, his jaws were closing in on the air just in front of me, his huge fangs glistening. _So, this is how that guy died… yippee. So, how am I gonna get on his back? Hmm…_

I looked around for some way to climb on safely, but the only things were the trees—and he would surely just attack me in those—and the tower. _Wait! The tower! That's it!_ I thought as his jaws snapped down on where I had been standing a few seconds ago. I quickly ran to the tower and climbed about a story worth of stairs and found the nearest window. I climbed into it and pressed myself outside as much as I would dare for fear of falling out.

The sound of his roar in the tower was deafening, and I could feel the old stone structure sway a little from the force of his body slamming into the sides of the tower as he quickly flew up the stairs. I waited for just the right moment, and as soon as he passed me on the stairwell, I jumped on his back, wrapping my arms around his neck as hard as I could. He flinched and slammed into the side of the wall, my head smashing against the old stone with bloodcurdling force.

Blood dripped down the side of my head, but I still held on, even as Syugoryuu bucked and writhed inside the cramped stairway. We climbed to the top and shot out of the opening, where he dropped down onto the platforms upside down, smashing me underneath him. My grip nearly faltered, but I clung on enough so I wouldn't fall.

He did several somersaults in the air, dove, thrashed about, and did about fifteen corkscrews before settling down just a little—giving me the chance I was looking for. I slid up farther on his neck, a few inches from being able to grab his horns. But as soon as he felt me shift, he climbed higher and higher into the clouds; I wondered how much farther we could possibly go. And as soon as I thought there was no way we could go any higher, he dropped like a stone and went into the steepest dive I've ever seen.

The force of the air was crushing, and I had trouble breathing from the pressure. The ground grew closer and closer, and I had no choice but to just _try_ and move up a little farther. I don't know how I did it, but managed to reach and grab onto his horns, sliding me up onto the beginning of his neck. But grabbing his horns wasn't enough to control him, so I took one hand and reached out for one of his long whiskers, feeling the pressure build on my arm, and I just _knew_ that my arm would surely be ripped off.

I grabbed it, making him yelp as I clutched it tightly in my hand. All I had to do was to grab the other and I could control him. I wrapped my elbow around one of his horns and tried to grab the other whisker; but I couldn't reach, so I let go of the horn and felt myself fly back as my legs were losing their hold on his neck. I flailed my hand in an attempt to grab the whisker as the ground came racing toward us.

_Gotcha!_ I screamed in my head when my hand closed around the thick, soft whisker and I pulled on them both, making Syugoryuu's head come up and end the horrifying dive. I reseated myself on his neck and made sure I had a good grip on everything. He roared in pain as I made him go up, left, right, down, left again, and finally down to the ground in front of the tower.

He landed none too gently on the grass, and as soon as I let go, he lifted his head so I slid down his neck and onto his back. He bucked and I went flying off, landing on my back painfully in front of him, knocking the wind out of me. But he wasn't calmed down yet; his teeth were still bared and his growl still echoed in the trees, but Hyourinmaru released a roar that rang for miles, making Syugoryuu come to his senses and my skin crawl.

Hyourinmaru left after that—no congrats or anything—but Syugoryuu stood by my side and laughed, "Well, look at that, you're in one piece. That's a first. My last master was the one who died, but the two before that lost at least one limb."

"Well, that's—good," I choked out, still trying to breathe. He looked me over, "Well, no broken bones, but you'll certainly be bruised tomorrow."

"What about—my head?" I sat up and took a deep breath, wiping some of the blood off the side of my face. He looked at it closer, "No worries. I can fix that."

He licked the wound once and it was healed. I was amazed, but a little skeptical, "So you can do that, but is that it?"

"Is what it?"

"The wound is healed, but what about my skull?"

"It's fixed too. But I can't fix bruising. Besides, they'll be all over you."

_Great…_ I thought as I wiped the rest of the blood off, "So, now that I beat your 'challenge', will you tell me how to unleash my shikai?"

"You earned it," he sighed, "Just say Kanzenchouaku* Syugoryuu, and whalah, shikai. It's time for you to head back. See ya later."

"Bye! Thanks, Syugoryuu!"

I opened my eyes and saw that I was back in the classroom, several of the others still asleep in their inner worlds. I stood up, put my zanpakutou back on my belt, and walked up to the front of the room.

"Master, I've gained my shikai."

"Good. Go wait out in the training area with the others."

"Yes, sir."

"Arghh!" Renji yelled, thrusting his sword against his oponent's—Mizuki Inuzuka—but was pushed back when Mizuki ducked and kicked Renji's legs out from under him. He got up and backed off, jumping to the other end of the training ground, yelling, "Hoero**, Zabimaru!"

His sword stretched into a wide black sword with jagged edges, with the very last edge sticking out like a dagger. He raised his arm and swung downward, his zanpakutou stretched, the different edges coming apart and wrapping around the Mizuki.

"Yeah! Renji!" I yelled, punching my fist in the air. Everyone else was screaming encouraging words too, including Kira and Momo, who sat beside me.

Mizuki's arms were trapped, and his loss was sealed when Renji ripped back Zabimaru and left thousands of jagged cuts all over the poor boy. He collapsed, dropping his unreleased zanpakutou and groaning as he hit the ground. Kira, Momo, and I stood up and yelled, "Way to go, Renji!" He heard us and grinned, resting his zanpakutou on his shoulder.

"Very good, Renji. You pass. Congratulations, you're ready to be part of the Gotei 13," Master said, and I felt my stomach drop. This test was to prove our worth as shinigami. For the next few months, we would be perfecting our shikai and our fighting skills, as well as our kido.

"Next, Nazeka Mamori and Momo HInamori."

We got up and stood on either end of the field. Master stood up and raised his hand, which was the signal to draw our zanpakutou. He dropped his hand, and sat back down as we took our stances.

"Hajike***, Tobiume!" Momo shouted, immediately releasing her zanpakutou. It changed into a silver blade with several smaller blades jutting out in right angles. She charged at me, and I slid to the left when she was a few inches away, quickly sheathing my zanpakutou and pressing against her right wrist with my palms, putting her behind me and facing the opposite way. I could hear the crowd to the side all cheering, with people screaming for either me or Momo.

"Did you see that! She put away her zanpakutou and just turned Hinamori around with her palms!"

"I think she's too cocky. Nazeka shouldn't put away her zanpakutou like that."

Momo turned around and raised her blade as it was covered with pink reiatsu that gathered at the tip and formed a ball. She brought down her blade and the ball launched into the air straight at me. I did a quick back bend and landed on my hands as the ball of reiatsu passed over my stomach and hit the ground behind me; I could hear the faint sound of bells ringing as it crashed into the dirt.

"Woah! Did you see that!"

"Who knew she was so flexible?"

"Yeah, Nazeka! Kick Hinamori's ass!"

"C'mon Hinamori, take this bitch down!"

I slowly raised myself up, feeling the pain in my back spread to my ribs and then to my pelvis. _Ah crap. I really shouldn't have done that_. I reached for my sword, but my arm was jerked back when an unsuspecting ball hit my in my right shoulder, burning it bad enough to reveal the skin and even burn deeper than that. I immediately grabbed my zanpakutou and backed off as Momo continued to fire those balls at me. _Tch, ths is going to be harder than I thought. I can just simply dodge them constantly; after all, I'm not _that_ flexible. But I'm better at Hakuda, not Zanjutsu. Okay, well…my shoulder's injured, I don't know what my zanpakutou does, and my entire abdomen is ringing with pain from that insane backbend. Well, might as well give my shikai a try since that's part of the point._

I held my blade in on hand and raised it over my left shoulder, screaming, "Kanzenchouaku, Syugoryuu!" I brought it down across to my right and watched as it changed. The guard and blade disappeared, leaving me with just the hilt. But twelve teal gray cords sprung from the hilt, each splitting into four other cords near the ends. On the very end of the cords were steel chains that ended in small razor sharp crescent blades.

Four more of the fiery orbs came flying at me, and I raised my arm, slicing through each of them with the ends of the whip. I brought down the whip and watched as the cord stretched and wrapped around Momo's left arm, digging the steel into her flesh. I pulled back and felt the crescents pull on her arm; she screamed as the steel came free, flying back. I raised my hand, but I suddenly felt something strange in my arm.

I looked to the side of me and saw the image of a young man holding onto my arm at the wrist and gently touching me on my shoulder. He had wild steel gray hair that was pulled into a loose ponytail at his waist; but it didn't end until about the backs of hi knees. He had two long strands of hair on either side of his head that curved around him and two scars on either jawbone. His eyes were yellow and he wore traditional 18th Century clothing with a chain around his waist in the same crescent symbol as my guard. His hands were cold, scaly, and clawed, like birds feet.

He looked at me and smiled, taking my hand and guiding it gently across my body, back up, to the left, the right, and then down. The whip stretched and curved around until it had completely surrounded Momo and closed around her, just Renji's had done. He pulled it back and I watched as Momo's skin was tainted with her own blood when the crescents ripped through her body.

This time, she held in her screams and stayed standing, much to my displeasure. But the man next to me sighed and let go of my hand and pointed to my left arm. I glanced over at it… but then did a double-take. My arm was bleeding as much as hers was, and then I saw that my clothes were soaked with blood. But I had never been hit! How was that even possible! The only thing that should be injured is my shoulder, and it should only be burned!

"_Do you know what Kanzenchouaku means, Nazeka? It means 'to reward the good and punish the evil'. Momo hasn't done anything evil, so what happens when you attack someone innocent is that the wounds you inflicted will be inflicted on you… even worse. As you see, you just did something evil by attacking someone innocent," _Syugoryuu's voice rang inside my head.

_But what about her? She's attacking me, who's also innocent! I haven't done anything evil!_

"…_You lied to Toushirou."_

I stopped. This was true. But there had been a good reason, and besides, Syugoryuu hadn't even kept his promise not to tell!

"_It doesn't matter. That was selfish. You've done something evil, so she's in the right."_

So even my own zanpakutou was against me. Well then, fine. I returned my sword to normal form and sheathed it. I flash stepped over to Momo and did a roundabout kick to her head, which she blocked using her Tobiume. But while I was still in the air, I flipped around and kicked her on the other side, knocking her to the ground. I was about to continue, but the Master interrupted us.

"Enough. Mamori, Hinamori, you've both passed. You showed extraordinary skills out there today. When Mamori realized that Hinamori had a long range attack, she backed off, using the distance to measure how much time she had until the attacks would hit her, using her brain and defensive well. Mamori also used her head by using another long range attack that had a better chance of hitting the target. And when she realized that her shikai had a major weakness, she switched back to Hakuda, her next primary offense and defense.

"As for Hinamori, by using a long range attack, she could push Mamori back, forcing her to use her zanpakutou instead of allowing her to use her primary offense tactic. Then she had the strength to continue fighting even when she was severely injured. Well done, both of you. I'm interested in seeing how you two will develop as shinigami over the years."

We bowed to Master, "Thank you," and Renji and Kira joined us to take us to the infirmary.

I looked around the courtyard where a bunch of people were hanging out, eating lunch. _Leave it to Toushirou to fail to tell me where he'd be waiting in the courtyard…_ I leaned against one of the many pillars and waited. _Who was that guy that guided my hand today? That couldn't have been Syugoryuu, could it?_

"Jeez, what happened to you?"

I jumped and spun around to see Toushirou standing there with a black haired boy about my height and age. They were both eyeing the bandages on my hand and my torn clothes. I shrugged, "Just a Zanjutsu class exercise."

"Well, damn, that must've been some exercise."

"We learned how to use our shikai today. Anyway, who's this?" I smiled at the other boy. Toushirou explained, "This is Kusaka Soujirou. He's in my class. Oh… and we have the same zanpakutou," He muttered, obviously not too happy. Kusaka smiled, "Hey there. Nice to meet you. You must be Nazeka. Toushirou talks about you a lot."

I didn't respond. _'"So you have two masters now?'"_ Syugoryuu's fight with Hyourinmaru… was over these two close friends who have the same zanpakutou. How horrible!

"Er, Nazeka?"

"Oh, yeah, pleasure to meet you too, Kusaka. Toushirou told me about you."

"Well, that's good to hear."

"Nazeka, I was wondering if you'd eat lunch with us today," Toushirou muttered, and I chuckled, "Sure. Where shall we eat?"

"Over there," he motioned to a tree in the left corner of the yard. We all moved over there and sat down in the shade, unpacking our lunches.

"So, you wanted to talk to me, Toushirou?"

"Yeah, but I'll tell you later."

"Okay…" I said, a little disappointed. I tried to pull out the wrapped onigiri, but my arms were so torn up, that it was hard to unwrap them or even hold them; it was just too painful. I was fidgeting with the wrapping, but then a hand grabbed mine. I looked up and saw Toushirou—with his expression completely nonchalant. His hand slid underneath mine and unwrapped the onigiri; and he picked it up and held it up to my mouth, "Here. Your hands must hurt."

"T-Thanks…" I could feel my face burn as I took a small bite. He set it down in my lap and took a bite of his own rice.

"So—Kusaka," I forced the rice down my throat to speak, "You also have Hyourinmaru as a zanpakutou. How did that happen?"

"I… I don't know. I mean, I had wanted to be a shinigami when I was little, but I didn't have a big enough spiritual pressure, so I knew they wouldn't accept me. I concentrated so hard on raising my reiatsu, and then one day, I finally gained a large spiritual pressure. Maybe Toushirou's Hyourinmaru heard me and wanted to help me."

_Yeah, but you don't realize what an incompetent bastard you are. Do you not know what will happen to Toushirou! You prize your zanpakutou more than your friends. You're not fit to have either of them._

"Wow, that's so… unusual. I've never heard of two people having the same zanpakutou. I wonder how they'd tell the two reiatsus apart."

"I don't think they can…" Toushirou muttered, stuffing his mouth with rice. He picked up my onigiri again and held it up to my mouth, but I took it and held it delicately, "No, it's okay, I can do it. It's just my arms and my palms. I can pick them up," I took a bite out of it and shrugged, "See?" But when I tried to pick up my water bottle, pain shot up my arm. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I tried to ignore them.

"Must I help you with everything?" He picked up the water bottle, opened it, and held it up to my mouth; but this just irritated me. I mean, I know that he was just trying to help, but the thing that just bothered me was that I had trouble eating my own lunch. If I want to be a good shinigami, I need to learn to take the pain. So I took the bottle from his hands and drank it myself… even though the pain built up in my elbow and wrist, and my bandages were getting redder by the second.

"You idiot! Don't force yourself to use your hands if it causes you pain!" He grabbed the water bottle and set it on the grass before grabbing my arm and examining it, making sure that the bleeding had stopped.

"You certainly care a lot about Nazeka, don't you?" Kusaka teased, and Toushirou immediately let go of my arm, stuttering, "Well, y'know, we're—we're friends after all. Friends look out for each other don't they?"

"Yeah, I suppose they do," he replied, grinning and taking a sip of his water, "If that's the case then, I hope that you and I become great friends, Nazeka."

I nearly spit out my water, but after regaining my senses, I swallowed it quickly, saying, "Oh, w-well, I do too." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Toushirou roll his eyes.

We sat and continued eating, talking about different things, like school, and what we were hoping to accomplish when we graduated. Then the bell ran soon after, alerting us that lunch was over. I stood up, and Toushirou helped me pick up my lunch before saying goodbye and disappearing with Kusaka.

I had only one impression of Kusaka from that lunch… and that was that I absolutely hated him.

**Nazeka's Room**

**March 28****th****, 1952  
**

I felt something fall on my chest early the day after my graduation while I was in bed… trying to sleep in.

"Hey, Nazeka, wake up! You've got some interesting stuff today that the Captain wanted to give to you," Kaien's voice was loud and disruptive, forcing my eyes open so I could glare at him.

"This is one of the only days I get to sleep in. Go the hell away!" I pulled the covers over my head and groaned, and I felt whatever he had dropped slide off. My covers were ripped back and Kaien hit me on the head, "Get up! I wouldn't get used to sleeping in if I were you. Here," He picked up what had slid off and handed them to me. It turned out to be several folded pieces of paper. I took them and opened them up; and after reading halfway down the page, the papers fell out of my hands.

"…I… I got a seat? I got fourth seat?"

Kaien nodded, grinning, "Under my recommendation of course." I jumped up and hugged him tight yelling, "Thank you, Kaien! Thank you!" He struggled underneath my grip and eventually pushed me off him, picking up the papers.

"You do know that you start in three days, right?"

"Yeah, I read that. I can't believe it! I'm a fourth seat under you and Ukitake!"

"That's Ukitake-taicho now. You were allowed to call him that when you weren't in a squad, but now that he's your captain, you're required to address everyone with their proper suffixes. Which means—"

"—I have to call you Shiba-fukutaicho? Aw, I'm going to miss calling you Kaien."

He sat there in silence for a second, "Or I suppose you could call me Kaien-dono if you want, like Rukia."

"Yay!" I yelled, hugging him again, but he immediately pushed me away and stood up, clearing his throat, "Anyway, as of three days from now, you will be the fourth seat of the thirteenth squad; therefore you will have more duties than a normal class officer. Your shihakushou will be here tomorrow and you are allowed to stay in this room, but you will report to us each morning at 6 a.m. to receive your instructions for whatever mission you are assigned."

"Yes sir!"

He left soon after, and I laid back onto my bed, just about bursting with excitement.

***Kanzenchouaku Syugoryuu—means 'Punish Guardian Dragon'. Technically, Kanzenchouaku means 'to reward the good and punish the evil'.**

****Hoero—'Roar'.**

*****Hajike—'Snap'.**


	8. The Prelude to Death

**Karakura Town**

**June 4, 1954**

"Damn it!" I screamed, hitting the wall next to me. I attracted several stares from the people around me; but honestly, I didn't care. I attracted a lot of stares wherever I went, 'changing' my personality every once in awhile. Man, I think I need to have a word with the Research Department about our gikongon.

But the reason I was so mad was because I had just received more orders. And here I was thinking I was going to get to go home. So much for that idea. I read letter carefully again, hoping that I had just misread it. Nope. Plain as day, it said:

"_4__th__ Seat of the Thirteenth Squad, Mamori Nazeka, you have been issued another order. You are required to secure the wellbeing of the souls located within the parts of both area 53.39 and area 53.40 for one week. Your perimeter is 200-Ken. Report back to Lieutenant of the Thirteenth Squad, Shiba Kaien after your mission immediately."_

I groaned, hanging my head. _Why, why, why did I have to get yet _another_ assignment? I've been here for a month and a half. I'm sick of living in a gigai!_ I just about crumpled up the piece of paper, but remembered that I had to return it. I wrote, _"Confirmed,"_ on the back and handed it back to the hell butterfly… once again attracting stares. After all, the piece of paper I just folded up and handed to no one had just disappeared.

A kid walked up to me and tugged on my shirt, asking shyly, "Um, 'scuse me, but are you a magician?"

I groaned inwardly again and crouched to his height, ruffling his hair and putting on a smile, "That's right. And I would perform for you right now if it wasn't for the fact that I have to go somewhere right now. I'm sorry."

"That's okay, oniisan. But I'd love to see you perform later!"

"I don't know kid, I'll only be here for another week, and then I'm leaving," I shrugged as I stood back up.

"Where?"

"Back to my home."

"Where's that?"

Just as I was about to answer, _"Far away,"_ his dad came up and grabbed his hand saying, "Now, now, no need to keep asking her questions." He looked at me, "Sorry to bother you."

"Oh, it's no big deal. I really don't wanna go, so killing a little time is nice," I said, grinning and putting my hands behind my head. He grinned as well, "I know the feeling."

"But even so, I really ought to get going. I don't want my higher ups getting upset with me."

"Alright."

I crouched down to the little boy's height again and smiled, "I'm sure we'll meet again." He nodded and waved as I stood up, saying, "Okay, I'll see you later then."

I nodded to the dad and ran off towards area 53.39, the high school—my old high school. OH. CRAP. Never in my life or afterlife would I have wanted to go back, and look at this, I have to go back to protect it. Yippee.

**Karakura Town**

**June 11, 1954**

Just one more day until I could go home… Of course, it had to be the day that something horrible happened.

I had been hanging around the school again. It hadn't changed much, but of course, I don't see why it should have. But after a few hours of boredom (it's contagious in a school yard) I went to the market to buy some food. I had just about made it there, when I saw the same little boy and father there.

"Hey there! See, I told you I would see you again," I tapped the little boy's shoulder, but when he turned around, I gasped and saw that a chain was protruding from his chest. His father turned around too, and I saw a chain on his chest too.

The little boy stared at me, "You… you can see us?"

I nodded sadly, "What happened? How did you…?"

"Have you ever heard of Jiinto Satsugaisha?" The father asked, putting his hand on his son's head.

"The mass murderer? I thought he was dead."

"Apparently that was what the government told us to make us stop worrying about it. But he's still at large. In fact—"

"—He murdered you guys." I finished, and the man nodded. The little boy started crying, so I kneeled to his height and put my hand on his shoulder, "You were so young… I'm sorry. Hey now, don't cry. Would you mind telling me your name?"

"H-Hayato."

"Okay, Hayato, I'll help you guys out, I promise. Would you mind coming with me?" I looked up at his father. He nodded and added, "What's your name? My name is Kenji Saikijuuou."

"My name is Nazeka Mamori. I'm actually here to help people like you. If you would please come with me, it would be a lot easier. There're just too many people."

"Of course."

I took them over toward the school, where there was no one outside to see. I put my gikon pill in my mouth, swallowed, and popped out of my body. The little boy smiled and laughed, clapping his hands, "That was cool! Do it again, do it again!"

"What are you?" Mr. Saikijuuou asked. I smiled reassuringly, "I'm a shinigami. I've been assigned to help souls like you pass on."

"So, you're not a magician?"

"No, sorry. But seeing as we're probably going to have a major flux in souls because of that murderer, I'm going to find him and take care of him."

"You're going to kill a murderer?"

"He can't see me, so why not? He'll be sent to Hell and that'll be the end of it. Anyway, it's time for you guys to move on. You'll be sent to the Soul Society, where all souls go to when they die if they lived a good life. It's really nice there. I live there as well."

"I don't wanna go!" Hayato cried, hiding behind his dad.

"Well, I'm sorry, but you have to. You're in danger here. A Hollow could come and eat you. We don't want that to happen."

"_Eat me!_" He squealed, digging his face into the back of his dad's pants. I looked up at Mr. Saikijuuou, "Will you _please_ talk to him. Both of you are in danger."

"I'm not sure I want to trust you about that whole 'eating' business. What the hell is a Hollow?"

"A soul that has been overcome by immense anger or sadness. Hollows can eat souls and the souls that they eat in turn become Hollows. I'm sure you don't want to become a Hollow. Then I'll have to exorcise you."

"Exorcise? Does that mean we'll—"

"It means your soul will be cleansed and you will be sent to the Soul Society. Now, will you _please_ stand still so I can perform a konso?"

"A what?"

"It takes you to the Soul Society. Please stop asking questions. I would like to get this over with so I can take care of that murderer. One question: where did you last see him?"

"He was over by the Kazai Living District."

"Kazai! Anyway, please, let me perform a konso." _Why did that sound so familiar? Where had I heard Kazai before?_

Mr. Saikijuuou pulled his son out from behind him and held still. I drew my zanpakutou and tapped him on the forehead with the back of the hilt. He turned light blue and disappeared into a Hell butterfly. Poor Hayato started to cry, so I knelt down at his side, "It's okay. Here, it doesn't hurt."

He nodded, sniffling, "Will I see you again?"

"Of course," I tapped his forehead and off he went. The only thing I had to do was find that murderer. Easier said than done. The Kazai district was supposed to be large… But, since it was a living district, I should be able to find him.

I jumped up onto one of the nearby buildings, commanding my gigai to go there too. After crossing multiple roofs, going through alleyways, and performing a few extra konsos (apparently, I'm attracting ghosts), I finally reached my destination. The Kazai district is one of the largest and most wealthy, a perfect place for a mass murderer.

I sent my gigai around the streets while I patrolled the roofs. So… how was I supposed to lure out a mass murderer? The sun was setting, and I had to go back tomorrow, so I had a limited amount of time to take care of this Jiinto Satsugaisha.

Night fell without any activity. I hopped from building to building. Everyone was inside without any problems it seemed. I went to the final building—which was an apartment complex—and looked inside the first room. It was empty, but it showed signs of life, so I moved onto the next one, and the next one, and the next one, with the same results. I had one more room to look into, so I looked into there too.

No one was inside, but… I recognized everything. The entire room was taped off, with everything protected by police coverings… and blood everywhere on the far wall. _This… This is my… This was my apartment when I was alive. And that blood… that blood is mine!_

"_That would happen to be why the name Kazai sounded familiar. You lived here."_

_I completely forgot. My memories have been steadily fading the more time I've lived in Soul Society. That blood… is from my death, when that Hollow killed me. But, I would've figured that the Police would've at least cleaned it up and allowed people to live here again._

"_Not necessarily. Your case can't exactly be explained by any normal means. So, they're probably still trying to solve it."_

_I guess. Anyway, do _you_ have any ideas?_

Immediately after, I felt a change in spiritual pressure. I looked to my right, where another apartment complex was and traced whatever had disturbed the normal flow. Chains had been cut. That's what it was, which means… Someone was killed!

I jumped over to that apartment and stepped through the wall—a technique that was basic, but I didn't like to use it, since it made me feel really weird. A huge, brawny man with thinning, oily black hair and sunken eyes was holding a woman by the neck, knife raised. Two bloody bodies lay motionless on the floor behind him—the bodies of a man and a young girl about the age of seven.

"Damn it," I muttered, staring at the ghosts of the same people. They were cowering in a corner, the man protecting his daughter.

The murderer glanced over in my direction and a look of amusement crossed his face, a little more wickedly than before.

"Well, well, what do we have here? A girl coming to save the day? How touching. I bet you don't even know these people."

"You can see me!" I asked in disbelief. _No way! That means he can touch me, and then… aw _damn it_!_

"_Relax, calm down. He's a human. He's had no experience in fighting spiritual beings. He's just like you when you were alive. You have more power than him. Besides, he just has a knife and you have me."_

_But that means he can see the other two souls and can use them._

"_But if you perform a konso, then he won't be able to reach them."_

_Good idea. But first, I'm going to have to take care of the woman._

I drew my zanpakutou and brought it down on the man's arm, slicing it clean off. He roared in pain and backed away, raising his knife again. I ran to the other souls, "Please, I will take you two away from here, where you will be safe. Hold still." I quickly raised my blade and tapped them on the forehead, making them disappear. But before I could stand back up, I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder and I twisted around, seeing the murderer with his knife. He gave a twisted smirk and raised his knife again, but I swung at him, catching his arm with my blade.

I grabbed his shirt and pressed my hand against his chest, reaching deep inside and grabbing his chain. He panicked, stabbing my shoulder several more times before cutting me across the cheek and at the collarbone. I pulled his soul out and watched as his body crumpled to the floor, completely lifeless. Still holding onto his chain, I raised my zanpakutou, "Ready to go to Hell?"

"Bitch!" He screamed, raising his arm that had once held the knife, but realizing that the knife hadn't come with him, he brought it down on my collarbone and I felt something crack. I swiftly swung at his chain and cut it straight through; I watched as the gates of Hell opened up and sucked him in. The woman who was still alive was already crouching by the bodies of her husband and daughter, screaming.

There was nothing I could do for her, so I simply left, checking my injuries. A few cuts on my right shoulder, a cut on my cheek, a stab mark on the back of my left shoulder, stab marks all along my left arm, and a cracked collarbone—thankfully not broken. The pain was so much different from when I had been at the academy, and when I had been on other missions, I had never been hurt. This was completely new to me.

I wandered over to where I had spent the previous nights—on a roof of one of the houses by the school—and wrapped my wounds. I was just about to lay down to sleep when a Hell butterfly found me, with a red piece of paper—a sign of emergency. I grabbed it and read it quickly:

"_4__th__ Seat of the Thirteenth Squad, Mamori Nazeka, Captain of the Thirteenth Squad, Ukitake Juushirou, has asked you to return immediately. This request is non-negotiable and immediate. You will return to the Soul Society __now__."_

"Why would he want me back now?" I asked myself, and handed it back to the Hell butterfly, opening the Senkaimon and going back. The shinigami at the gate welcomed me and said that I should hurry to the barracks. I nodded, concerned, and sprinted to the barracks as fast as I could.

I went straight to Ukitake-taicho's office, where he was waiting. I shut the door behind me and quickly asked, "Taicho, what's wrong? Why was I called back so suddenly?"

"Nazeka… we have some bad news."

"What?"

"Kaien… Kaien is dead."

The news hit me like a blow to the gut. Kaien-dono was dead? That couldn't be possible… no, not Kaien-dono!

"H-How? How did Kaien-dono die!"

"Miyako was murdered by a Hollow, including her whole platoon—"

"—Our third seat was killed?"

"Yes. And Kaien wanted to kill the Hollow that had killed her, even when I warned him that the Hollow had special abilities. He went anyway, and Rukia and I accompanied him. We went to it's lair—which was here in the Soul Society—and Kaien wanted to go alone, so I let him. His zanpakutou was destroyed, and the Hollow combined with him, knocking Kaien unconscious and using his body to kill both me and Rukia. I told Rukia to run, but I had a tuberculosis attack then, so she came back. She killed Kaien, since there was no way to separate him from the Hollow because they were both spiritual beings."

"So, we had to kill him…"

"I'm sorry Nazeka, I know you and Kaien were good friends."

"I-It's o-okay," I could feel myself breaking; tears welled up in my eyes and I knew I was going to cry any time, so I forced myself to hold it together.

"Nazeka," Ukitake rested his hand on my shoulder, "It's not okay. And it's okay to cry sometimes, you know. I'll take you off the next mission I had ready for you to let you recover from this, okay?"

"Th-Thank you, T-Taicho," I whimpered. I knew it was coming, but I tried hard to keep it back.

"You may return to your room if you would like."

"Th-Thank you, Taicho."

"Stop the formalities."

"Thank you, Ukitake," I whimpered, and ran to my room, where I shut the door and leaned against the wall, sliding down to the floor and letting my tears pour out.

"K-Kaien…"

**13****th**** Squad Barracks**

**Two days later**

I sat on the porch outside my room with my hands folded on my knees. The fact that Kaien was dead was still painful; after all, it had only been two days since I had learned the news. I felt selfish to wish he was still here, but after Miyako had died, I suppose he would have wanted to be with her… wherever they were.

"Nazeka…"

I jumped; I hadn't even heard any footsteps, so I had no idea that someone else was standing beside me. I looked up, expecting it to be Ukitake, but when I saw the yukata, I knew I was wrong. Instead, it was Toushirou, his expression as solemn as ever.

"Hi, Toushirou," I said quietly, staring at the dirt again. He sat down next to me, "Ukitake asked me to come. He told me about Kaien-fukutaicho. I'm sorry. I know you two were good friends."

"Thanks, but it's okay. It wasn't your fault, so don't apologize."

He looked up at the sky and sighed, "Well, anyway, how about we get your mind off of it? You know, you've been pretty busy lately."

"I know. It's been really hectic. They've been giving me missions right and left. I come home from one, get three days to rest and do whatever, and then it's back again for another one."

"Must be tough. Oh, there was something I had been wanting to tell you. I just never had time to since you were gone."

"What is it?"

"Kusaka and I… we've been ordered to Central 46 in two weeks."

"Central 46? Why would they want you two?"

"I don't know."

"Do you think it has something to do with you two having the same zanpakutou?"

"I don't know."

"Alright…"

"I have one more thing I was going to tell you."

"Alright, shoot."

"I was going to tell you 'Happy Birthday'."

"Thanks. It's the thought that counts, even if it was a month ago." My birthday is April 30th, and I didn't really think about it at the time—I was too busy with missions.

We sat in silence for a while, and I suddenly felt something touch my hand. I looked down to see Toushirou's hand slide in between my own and interlock with my fingers. I smiled, but then I remembered Kaien… _Thanks, Toushirou, but it didn't last long…_ I felt the tears well up in my eyes again, and I pulled away my hand, pulling up my knees and wrapping my arms around them. I dug my face into my lap and let the tears go.

"H-Hey, d-don't cry. Er… I mean… uh… Nazeka, please?" Toushirou put his hand on my shoulder and tried to stop my crying; but I just dug my face in farther.

"Please, Nazeka. There's nothing you can do and there's nothing you could have done. Kaien's with his wife now, so I'm sure he's happy… damn… please stop crying…"

I looked up at him and rubbed my eyes, trying to smile, "I'm sorry. I can't help it. It's just that Kaien was so much fun to be around, and now he won't be there to scold Sentaro or Kiyone when they get drunk or train Rukia and me, or even drag me into helping him with the paperwork… it'll just be so different without him."

"It's okay," I felt his arms wrap around me, and I complied without thinking. I tucked my head against his shoulder and heard him whisper, "I'm just glad you're back."

**Captain's Room, 13****th**** Squad Barracks**

**June 26****th****, 1954**

"You… wanted to see me, taicho?" I asked, popping my head into the door of Ukitake's office. He waved me inside with the swish of his brush and began writing again. I shut the door behind me and stood in front of his desk, at full attention.

He looked up and laughed, "No need for that. I just called you in to tell you that Head-Captain Yamamoto has requested that you be at the next captain meeting tomorrow."

"T-Tomorrow? But I was going to—but sir, Toushirou has been called to Central 46 tomorrow and I—"

"I'm sorry, Nazeka, but Yamamoto-soutaicho's request is unchangeable. He wants to see you tomorrow for something very important, and it cannot be prolonged to another day. You'll just have to go see Toushirou tomorrow after his hearing."

"You make it sound like he's being imprisoned."

"He won't be, but that's what it's called. I would let you go see him now, but seeing as our third seat and lieutenant are no longer with us, you're the next person in line I can ask for helping me with paperwork."

"I—yes, sir. I understand…"

"Thank you."

We sat in silence for awhile, both of us doing our own stack of paperwork that we had dished out. After about halfway down through my stack, I was handed another group of papers, while Ukitake took several of the papers out of the middle of my stack, "I'm sure you don't want to fill out the paperwork about Kaien."

"Oh, thank you," I went back to filling out paperwork, "So… Ukitake-taicho, who do you think will fill in our third seat's position and our lieutenant?"

"I believe that Kotetsu and Kotsubaki would make excellent co-third seats. As for the lieutenant… I have someone in mind…"

"Really? Who?"

Just as he was about to answer, there was a knock on the door. While Ukitake went and answered it, I finished up my pile of papers and set down my brush.

"Ukitake-taicho, I'm finished. May I please go see—" My stomach growled, and I quickly wrapped my arms around my stomach, trying to muffle the sound, but that only made it worse.

"Why don't you go have dinner? They were making Teriyaki Udon Noodles tonight, and I know that's your favorite."

"Really! Alright!" I got up, bowed to Ukitake and ran out the door to the dining hall. There were already several shinigami in there, so I got in line and waited my turn patiently. After getting my meal—along with some Dragonwell tea—I sat down next to Rukia and began eating.

"Hey! How's it going?" I asked. She just played with her food and replied with a half-hearted, "Fine."

"Alright," I knew it was Kaien, so I didn't say anything about it. She was still a little touchy about the subject. So, I looked around the room and saw one of the newbies, "Hey, do you know who that is?"

"I believe that's Mizuko. She's new here. She and Mizuki from the Academy are brother and sister."

"Wow, talk about unoriginal parents."

"Hmph, they renamed themselves after they died."

"Oh… so it's not the parents' fault. I gotcha. Still… a bit unoriginal."

"If that's what you think…" She took the last few bites of her meal, picked up her dishes, and walked off. I sat there with my food alone… _Jeez, thanks for leaving me… oh well. I suppose me and Rukia aren't the _greatest_ friends…_

"Hey, Mamori!"

I turned around to the sound of my name to see Kiyone and Sentarou waving, their other hands holding bottles and cups for sake. They ran over and sat on either side of me, setting down their bottles.

"You want some sake?" Sentarou asked, holding out a cup. I held up my hand in refusal and laughed, "You idiot, I'm underage."

"Not anymore you're not."

"Since when?"

"How old are you?"

"I don't remember. I don't even remember what year I was born."

"Think!" Kiyone and Sentarou pressed.

"All I know was that I was… fifteen? Yeah, I was fifteen when I got here."

"How many years has it been?"

"Um… let's see… seven? No, eight years."

"Right, so what's eight plus fifteen?"

"Er, 23?"

"Exactly! You're not underage anymore! You can drink as much as you like!" They handed me a cup and poured me some sake from one of the many bottles.

"But physically I'm still fifteen—"

"Mamori, that doesn't matter anymore. Just drink some."

"Okay, fine…" I took a sip of the alcoholic drink and immediately made a face. It tasted so different! I swallowed it and lifted the cup to my lips again. The two beside me started to fill their own cups and drink too.

We sat there and drank for a little while, they drinking much more than me. They emptied about five bottles each, while I only drank two bottles, but I could feel my head start to spin.

"I-I think I'm gonna go to bed now. Th-Thanks for the drink," I stood up a little wobbly, and they waved, their faces on the table with their hands still clutching the bottles and cups. I tried to walk as best I could, but it was so obvious I had had too much. After about thirty minutes—it usually only took five—I reached my room, and damn was I dizzy.

"I don't feel so good."

"_Serves you right! What the hell were you drinking for? You wanna get wasted the night before you have to go to a Captain meeting? What is wrong with you, damn it!"_

"Oh shit, I forgot about the meeting. Damn…" I moaned, shutting the door behind me.

"_Good luck getting out of this mess."_

"I'll figure *hic* something out. For now, I'm going to bed."

"_Don't sleep in!"_

"I know, I know!"

I fell onto the floor and went to sleep immediately, even though Syugoryuu spent the night scolding me in my head.

**Oh wow, you know, the whole drinking thing wasn't planned… but, I had to have her do something… Anyway, sorry for the choppiness! Okay, and to be technical, Nazeka should be about 22, in actuality, but no one cares anymore. **** AND THERE WILL BE MORE TOUSHIROU FLUFF GOODNESS FOR THOSE WHO WANT IT IN THE NEXT CHAPTER! (Any requests? Let me know. I enjoy reading your comments! Thanks!)**


	9. Death is Closer Than We Think

"NAZEKA! WAKE THE HELL UP!"

I jumped in my sleep and sat up with a headache and a horrible stomachache. It was horrible, and I was almost completely confused about what had happened the night before.

"You're an idiot."

"Uh… I'm not… I'm gonna…"

"Oh man, you better not do it here."

I held my hand over my mouth and ran to the bathroom, feeling my stomach do a back flip.

"Aw, disgusting. Well, we now know your limit. Fifteen cups and you're drunk."

"Sh-Shut up. What time is it?" I asked, still shaky. I wiped my mouth and looked down. I was still in my shihakushou, but I changed into a different one anyway.

"It's 9:48."

"S-So, I didn't sleep in?"

"No."

"Then, I'm not going to be late?"

"If you leave now, then no. But you are so lucky. So, get going already, damn it!"

I hopped out of the room, still trying to get my sandals on, and running a hand through my hair. I ran as fast as I could to the first squad barracks so I wouldn't be late. I tried to calm my breathing and look as confident and calm as I could. The doors opened and I kneeled in respect to all the captains present in the room.

The doors closed behind me and Yamamoto-soutaicho spoke, "Mamori Nazeka, fourth seat of the Thirteenth Squad, you have been summoned here by me."

"Yes sir."

"The reason I have summoned you, is to promote you to lieutenant of the Thirteenth Squad. Congratulations. You are one step closer to becoming captain..."

I looked up at him, still kneeling. W-What… did he just say? I-I'm a lieutenant? I brought myself back and said quietly, "T-Thank you sir."

"You may leave. The rest of the meeting is classified to anyone lower than captain class."

"Y-Yes sir," I bowed my head, rose, and left through the huge doors. I sat outside against the wall, waiting for my captain to come out of the meeting. I can't believe it… I'm a lieutenant? But… I didn't even want the position, and this was Kaien's position. I feel like I'm taking his place…

I waited for about thirty minutes, when the doors finally opened again. The first captain that walked out was Komamura-taicho, wearing his huge helmet again. (I still really want to know what he looks like…) After that was Soifon-taicho, then Kuchiki-taicho, and then Ukitake-taicho. I stood up, bowed in respect and joined up with my captain, who smiled when he saw me.

"Congratulations, Nazeka. Looks like our lieutenant problem is solved."

I narrowed my eyes, "But Ukitake-taicho, you sound like you don't even care that this was Kaien's seat. It's like we're trying to erase him from this position."

"Nazeka, you need to understand that this is how the Gotei 13 works. Once a lieutenant is gone, then they must be replaced. Same with captains, third seats, and so on. You've been selected as the best candidate for the position of lieutenant, so you were assigned there. It has nothing to do with the past lieutenants."

"But that doesn't change the fact that Kaien was a lieutenant. I feel like I'm taking his place."

"You can't change Yamamoto-soutaicho's mind. You've become a lieutenant, he promoted you, and it's now official. I have your badge in my office, and all the paperwork was filled out last night."

I froze, "Y-You knew?"

He held up his hands, "No, no, I found out late last night, after dinner. I got the paperwork then."

I sighed and shook my head, "It's alright… I'm just not exactly ecstatic for this position…"

"You never were too excited to be a shinigami in the first place." He waved for me to walk with him back to the barracks and asked, "So, you were nearly late this morning… that's not like you."

"Right well…"

"She got drunk thanks to the two people you want as third seats. Rethink it ol' man!"

Don't call him an old man!

"I overslept unfortunately. I guess I'm staying up too late."

"Liar."

Shut up! Make like a real zanpakutou and go to sleep, damn it!

"Well, it's just a good thing you made it on time. The Captain-Commander would not have liked it at all had you been late."

"Thank Syugoryuu. He's the one who woke me up."

"Yeah! Score for the zanpakutou!"

Aren't you supposed to be asleep?

"Maybe…"

Then go to sleep! Why don't you do what I tell you?

"Because until you master Bankai, you're not fully my master."

That's next on my list then. Maybe then I can get you to shut up in my head!

Ukitake-taicho and I continued talking until we reached his office and he went into his office, "I have your badge in here, just give me a second." He came out with Kaien's badge and I tied it around my arm, where most lieutenants keep it. "You can wear it wherever you like, you know, but you can keep it there."

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind."

"I'm surprised that you're not leaving already."

"Leaving? For what?"

"Don't tell me you've forgotten about Toushirou! His summons with the Central 46! It should be over already."

"Oh man, I completely forgot! Thanks, taicho! I'll be back when I can!"

"I think I can hold down the fort while you're gone. Now go on!" He waved me away, and I smiled, running off in the direction of the Central 46's building. The guards there nearly sent me flying when I tried to run into the building, so I confronted them immediately, still out of breath, "What the hell! Are Toushirou Hitsugaya and Kusaka Soujirou still in there! I need to be in there!"

"Their meeting is over. Kusaka Soujirou has been eliminated and Toushirou Hitsugaya was sent back to the dorms."

"K-Kusaka is dead? Why? How did he die?"

"That is classified. Leave. Now. Before we call for the main guards."

"Great, so you're just the small fry. Fine, don't tell me, see if I care," I spun around and headed for the dorms, manned by even more guards. Just. Perfect.

"Is Toushirou Hitsugaya in there?"

"He never returned from the summons. Sorry, fukutaicho."

I stammered when I heard him use that suffix, "O-Okay, thanks." I walked over to the gate and collapsed against the wall next to it. Where the hell is he? I heard the slight ring of a small bell and looked up to see a Hell Butterfly passing by, heading over in the direction to the 11th Squad's Barracks, repeating this same message, "Attention, this is an update in immediate ranks. Mamori Nazeka of the 13th Squad has been promoted to Lieutenant. I repeat:—" It repeated; I sighed, "I sound like a celebrity. Jeez, I really don't like this…"

I regained my breath and pondered where Toushirou could be. Not the dorms, not Central 46… Oh! Maybe he went home! I stood up and ran out the gate and towards Junrin'an. It took me a little while longer than usual to get to the district because I went out the wrong gate, but I managed to get there around lunch time at least… which happened to be about an hour later. I immediately burst through the gate, took off my sandals, and ran into the house. Granny Hitsugaya was sitting on a cushion reading an old book, and I bowed slightly and greeted her, "Hi there. Did Toushirou come back here?"

"Oh, Nazeka. I'm glad you came. Toushirou did come back, but he went out to the backyard and onto the hill. He was extremely angry. Maybe you could do something about it."

"Thanks so much!" I ran out the door, grabbed my sandals and sprinted to the backyard, "Toushirou! Toushirou!" I called out when I saw him sitting, hunched over. He looked up and I could see tears on his cheeks.

"T-Toushirou, what's wrong? What happened?"

"Kusaka… Kusaka's dead! They made us fight; they made us kill each other… I didn't want too but… but he…"

"Slow down Toushirou. I heard about Kusaka's death. I've been looking everywhere for you. I'm sorry that I couldn't see you yesterday or earlier, but some things happened and I was really busy this morning. Now, tell me what happened… slower this time." I sat next to him and put my sandals back on as he spoke.

"Central 46 called us in about our zanpakutou. They said that there couldn't be two of them and I offered to give Hyourinmaru up. I never wanted to be a shinigami in the first place, so I giving up Hyourinmaru wouldn't have been hard; but they still wanted us to fight. They said that we were going to have to fight to the death, and the winner would keep Hyourinmaru. Kusaka was all for it, but I pleaded with them to let me just abandon Hyourinmaru."

"They still wouldn't hear of it, would they?"

"No, so we fought. I was winning, but then the Onmitsukido came and killed Kusaka on orders of Central 46. I can't believe it… They made us fight! They made me kill Kusaka."

"Kusaka's death wasn't your fault. It was Central 46's fault. There's no need to beat yourself up for that."

"But one of my closest friends died! I-I miss him… And I just can't believe that he wanted Hyourinmaru for himself…"

I hugged him and rested his head on my shoulder, "It's okay you know. I know what it feels like to loose someone you care about. And to think that it was merely weeks ago… I promise that it'll be okay in the end." I could feel my sleeve getting wetter and wetter as he kept crying; his body was shaking, so I thought of some way to calm him down.

I sang the lullaby that I remembered from my childhood. It was my last memory of my past life, and I was grateful that I remembered it.

*"If you'll be my star, I'll be your sky.

You can hide underneath me and come out at night

When I turn jet black, and you show off your light,

I live to let you shine, I live to let you shine.

But you can sky rocket away from me

And never come back if you find another galaxy

Far from here, with more room to fly

Just leave me your stardust to remember you by.

If you'll be my boat, I'll be your sea

A depth of pure blue just to probe curiosity

Ebbing and flowing and pushed by a breeze

I live to make you free, I live to make you free

But you can set sail to the west if you want to

And pass the horizon 'til I can't even see you

Far from here where the beaches are wide

Just leave me your wake to remember you by.

If you'll be my star, I'll be your sky

You can hide underneath me and come out at night

When I turn jet black, and you show off your light

I live to let you shine, I live to let you shine

But you can sky rocket away from me

And never come back if you find another galaxy

Far from here, with more room to fly

Just leave me your stardust to remember you by

Stardust to remember you by."

By the time I finished singing, his shuddering had stopped, and he was looking at me sadly. He wiped his eyes and said quietly, "Where'd you hear that song?"

"It was a lullaby that someone used to sing to me when I was little. It's the only thing I remember from when I was alive."

"I'm glad you remembered it," He leaned in closer and whispered, "Nazeka?"

"Hm?" I asked, and I felt his lips touch mine softly before he whispered, "Thank you."

Seireitei

April 2nd, 1957

I ran through the maze of buildings as fast as I could. I was so excited that I could hardly control it. The tenth squad's barracks had to be around here somewhere, but in my rush, I had gotten lost. I went down a few more roads only to come up short again. I looked around, backtracked, and then went down another road. This time, I was right, and the gates to the barracks were around the corner. I burst through and immediately asked the lieutenant there where I could find Toushirou Hitsugaya.

"The new third seat? He's over in the main barracks, where his room is. Down the hall, take a right at the next hallway, and it's the fifth room to the right."

"Thanks Matsumoto-san!" I called out, following her directions. I opened the door and sang, "Congrats, Toushirou!"

He turned around and was immediately glomped by me, struggling to say, "Get off me! That hurts, damn it!"

I let go and ruffled his hair instead, "I can't believe it; you graduate and you're immediately placed as a third seat. But watch, I bet you'll become lieutenant in no time!"

"I don't wanna be a lieutenant! I hate this. I wish I could just go home. I have Hyourinmaru under control, so now I won't hurt Granny. I don't want to be part of a squad."

"I know; but you know, you won't truly have him under control until you master bankai."

"Whatever. I can control my reiatsu enough so it won't leak everywhere."

"True."

He threw his shihakushou in the closet and slammed it shut. I laughed, "I think you're mad at something other than becoming part of a squad. What is it?"

"It's her. I can't believe it! How could they have put me in the same squad as that stupid red-head!"

"Are you talking about Matsumoto-san?"

"Don't even say her name! She's a total pain in the ass and it's her fault that I became a shinigami in the first place!"

"Without her, your grandma could be dead. You should be at least a little grateful to her."

"I don't give a damn! It's her fault that I'm here! In other words, it's her fault that Kusaka's dead!" He kicked the stack of transfer papers and crumpled the floor. I kneeled next to him and tried to smile, "Hey now, don't blame Matsumoto-san. She had both your grandmother's and your best interests when she said that you should go to the Academy. And you're the one who decided to go; she didn't force you."

"He's just still upset about Kusaka that he's pushing the guilt and sadness he feels onto someone else. It's natural."

I didn't do that when Kaien died…

"Yeah, but Kaien's death had nothing to do with you."

True…

He put his head in his hands and groaned, "What am I gonna do?"

"You could just deal with it and learn to be friends with her."

"You seriously think I could do that? You're an idiot."

I narrowed my eyes and smacked him in the head, "Jerk, watch it. That was mean." I stood up and headed for the door. If he was going to call me an idiot, then I was gonna leave. Toushirou immediately jumped up and grabbed my hand, "Wait, Nazeka, I didn't mean that… I'm just so frustrated right now. I-I'm…" He muttered something that I couldn't understand.

"What?"

He sighed, "I'm sorry."

"Well… I need to go anyway. I wish I could do something about your frustration, but I can't. You're just going to have to deal with Matsumoto-san and get over it. Now I really oughta get going."

"Fine… but where are you going?"

"It's a surprise. See ya later!" I ran out the door and left the barracks, waving good-bye to Matsumoto-san and heading for the shopping district in Junrin'an.

"I think it's time for a little change…" I muttered to myself, stepping into one of the shops there.

I left the shop and scratched my head, feeling my hair down to its new length. I had gotten it cut to just below my chin. It was nice having it that short, and it would especially be beneficial in battle. ran a hand through it one last time before heading back into the Seireitei. It would take me awhile to get back to barracks, but I thought about taking especially long since Ukitake-taicho was sick and I would have to do all the paperwork by myself... But since it was bound to happen, I was gonna have to force myself to do it. Yippee...

I meandered around the streets fighting with myself whether or not to go over to the barracks immediately, when I bumped into a familiar face.

"Uh... Mamori-fukutaicho?"

"Hey there Renji. How's it going?" I smiled.

"Nothing much... but you got your hair cut..."

"Yep. Like it?"

"You do know it'll never grow back, right? Since you died before you came here and you don't change at all..."

"Did you seriously think that I would do something like this without thinking about that? Eh, I prefer it short, honestly. Anyway, I need to get going. Ukitake-taicho's sick, so I have to take care of the paperwork. See ya later." I waved good-bye with a simple sway of my hand and used shunpo to get to the barracks faster.

Okay, so I completely ruled out the fact that I could do that earlier... but still... who wants to do paperwork?

I entered the office and immediately picked up the stack of papers at the captain's desk. I carried them over to mine, located in another corner of the room, and sat down, ready to start on the huge stack. So I had let it pile up for a few days... I had made sure that there wasn't anything urgent in them!

I picked up the brush and picked up the first piece of paper when the door opened. I looked up to see Rukia, head bowed in respect.

"Mamori-fukutaicho..."

"Hey, Rukia! New mission?"

"Y-Yeah..."

"Oh, and Rukia?"

"Yes, ma'am?"

I stood up and crossed the room until I was standing right in front of her, eye to eye. I took a deep breath and shouted, "How many times do I have to tell you not to call me 'fukutaicho'? Jeez..." I went back to my desk and quickly went through the papers, scanning them for the title 'mission log'.

"Sorry..."

"You know how much I hate it that you call me that. We're friends, aren't we?"

"Yeah."

"Then call me like you would call a friend. Jeez, no formality involved, okay?"

"Sure..."

"This better be the last time I tell you that."

"Yes, ma'am-"

I raised an eyebrow, and she quickly fixed her sentence, "No problem, Nazeka. I'll remember."

"Thanks. Damn it all, where is that mission log! It should be in this stack!"

"Um, Nazeka, you do know that they stopped giving those out last week and you were supposed to go pick them up at the first squad's barracks, right?"

I froze, "Er... what?"

"They made that announcement last week."

I dropped the papers back onto my desk and felt a vein in my temple pop, "...Damn it all!"

*These are the lyrics to a song called Boats & Birds by Gregory and the Hawk. I do not own these lyrics, and they belong to all those who own the copyright.


	10. Happy Birthdays and Broken Laws

13th Squad Barracks

April 30th, 1965

There was a knock on the door, so I automatically said, "Come in."

I heard it slide open, and then shut, but I kept my eye on the papers in front of me. I had learned to do the paperwork as soon as I got it so I wouldn't have to deal with it all at once, so now I was working on what I had just gotten earlier.

"Nazeka?"

I looked up to see Toushirou standing in front of me. I smiled and went back to filling out a new recruit's log.

"Hey, Toushirou."

"Are you going to sit in here and work on paperwork all day when it's your birthday? Or are you actually going to do something fun?"

"Since when have you actually wanted to do something labeled 'fun'? Ever since Kusaka died, you've been so much more serious. I haven't seen you smile in years."

"Don't... Don't mention his name... Not now at least."

"Alright, I won't. Now, what is it that you want to do? Besides, don't you have work to do too? I heard you were being recruited as the new captain since Aijou-taicho is retiring. You ready for the responsibility, my short friend?"

I could almost hear the vein in his forehead pop when I mentioned his height.

"I'm taller than you are now! At least I'm growing... a little!"

"Someone's got a Napoleon complex..." I sang, and he growled, "Shut the hell up. You're shorter, so you have no room to talk! None at all! And you won't grow!"

"Don't remind me. So, what were you planning on doing, 'Oh Tall Future Captain'?"

"I wanted to show you something."

I raised an eyebrow, "Where?"

"In Rukongai. Over in Hokutan."

"Hokutan? Why there?"

"You'll see. Come on," He held out his hand and I took it, following him out the door and down the hall. We passed by Ukitake who was having one of his good weeks, but wasn't doing any of the paperwork (much to my annoyance).

"Ah, Hitsugaya-kun, Nazeka, where are you two...?"

"Toushirou wanted to show me something, since it's my birthday, so I'll be back later, okay?"

"Perfectly fine with me. But make sure you come back to my office around six."

"Uh... okay. I don't think I'll be gone that long, but I'll remember!"

Toushirou dragged me around the corner, out of the barracks, and through the western gate. Hokutan was farther back than Junrin'an, so we had to go through the first and second districts. While passing through the Junrin'an, we saw some kids playing tops in a small little arena. I saw Toushirou smile a bit for the first time in such a long time, so I made him stop and asked, "Didn't you tell me you were really good at tops?"

"In Junrin'an, I was the undefeated champion. But, that doesn't mat-"

"Would you like to play? I've never played that game before!"

"You've never played? Seriously?"

"No. Can you teach me?"

"Sure."

We walked over to the kids and their wooden arena, but as soon as they saw us, the cowered a bit and stopped their game. I tried to smile, "Hey there. Mind if we join you?"

They didn't answer, and kept their distance; however, one of them stepped forward and asked, "Why are you here?"

"We just wanted to play tops. I've never played before, and my friend here offered to teach me. We'll play with you if you want."

"No, I mean why are you here?"

"In Hokutan?"

"Yeah, shinigami," he spit the name out, "why the hell would you want to come to the Rukongai? Don't you have something to do in your plush life other than show off here?"

"But-"

"Get out of here shinigami!"

"Yeah! Get out!"

"Go away!"

"Enough!" Toushirou yelled, stepping in front of me, his lip twitching in anger, "Leave her alone, damn it! She asked nicely and you guys just took the fact that she was a shinigami and threw it in her face!"

"You're shinigami! You've never been nice to us!"

"Well she certainly is! You kids don't give any of us a chance!"

"That's 'cause you guys don't treat us fairly!"

"Toushirou..." I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back, "It's fine. You don't have to teach me. It's obvious these kids aren't going to change their mind right now, and it doesn't help that you're yelling at them. C'mon, let's just go."

He sighed and glanced at the kids, many of which were sticking out their tongues, "But..."

"C'mon," I urged, pushing him away from them, "What were you going to show me?"

"Alright, come with me," He stepped away from my hands to keep me from pushing him and instead grabbed my wrist, pulling me behind him and away from the inner 'city' of Hokutan. He led me through the forest and we started going up one of the mountains.

"You know, I've never been to Hokutan before. What mountain is this?"

"Mount Koifushi. Junrin'an has some smaller mountains, but they're on the side farthest from the Seireitei."

"And we're going up this mountain?"

"Yes."

"So... what is there to show me up there?"

"You'll see."

We climbed higher until we reached a cliffside covered in soft grass and some small trees. He pulled me farther toward the edge and sat down, motioning for me to join him. I sat down and looked out over the edge.

"Wow!" I exclaimed, amazed at the view. I could see almost half of the seireitei, including the my squad's barracks and the tenth squad's barracks. I could even see Inuzuri, which was number 78 in South Rukongai-a pretty far distance from the Seireitei.

"I thought you'd like it."

"It's amazing! I can even see Inuzuri! How'd you find this place?"

"I asked Ukitake if he knew of anywhere you'd like to go, and he said to ask Rukia about a mountain in Hokutan. He said that she and Kaien trained up here once, and when I asked her about it, she told me about this place. I came up here the other day."

"It's beautiful."

We sat in silence for awhile, staring out at the huge expanse of both the Seireitei and Rukongai, before Toushirou said, "I got you something."

"Really? You really didn't have to."

"No, I really wanted to. Here," he handed me a small box, "Hyourinmaru taught me how to make it after I had learned bankai..." I could see his face turn red when I took the box and opened it. Inside was a small crystal of ice on a silver chain. I picked it up and held it up to the light, "Toushirou, it's beautiful!"

"Unless my reiatsu disappears completely, the ice won't melt."

"That's amazing! I didn't know you could do that!"

"Well, now you know."

"Thank you, Toushirou. I love it," I cupped his cheek and kissed him. I could feel him stiffen, but then his lips curled into a smile and he kissed me back. But he broke away and took the chain from my hand, "Here, I'll help you put it on."

He wrapped it around my neck and fastened the clasp; it was cold, but it was a strange cold. It wasn't unpleasant at all, in fact, it was like the ice was alive.

"As much as I don't want to, we should go back so you can go see Ukitake about whatever it was he wanted."

"Do we have to?"

He stood up and helped me to my feet, "Yes. I'm the one who's going to get in trouble if I don't get you back in time."

"It's only like... four! He said I didn't have to be back until six."

"Yeah, but it takes us an hour and a half to get back. Let's go."

"Aw..." I moaned as I tucked the necklace under my shitagi.

Toushirou followed me inside the office and I asked, "Ukitake-taicho, you wanted to see me?"

Ukitake smiled and set down his brush, "We're going out to eat tonight! Kyouraku's treat!"

"O-out to eat?" I asked, "Why?"

"It's your birthday, isn't it?"

"Yeah, but..."

"We decided to do something special."

"Er... why now?"

"Kyouraku's idea. Toushirou-kun's invited too!"

"Eh?" Toushirou asked, surprised. Ukitake nodded, "Of course! Now come on you two, Kyouraku said he'd meet us there, so let's go!" He stood up and left the room, disappearing around the corner. I looked at Toushirou, "What... just happened?" I had no say in this!

"You're being invited to dinner. What, has this never happened to you before?"

"Actually... no... I mean, Kaien asked me and Rukia to accompany him before... and Ukitake-taicho and Kyouraku-taicho once asked me to join them to drink some sake but..." I remembered the last time I drank sake, "Yeah, that's not going to happen anytime soon. And I remember that Renji, Momo, and Kira asked me to join them once... they invited Rukia too."

"You never accepted any of their requests?"

"Um... no, I never did. It just seemed like a total pain in the ass... and it still is."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because I've never been out to eat before... I don't think I ever went when I was alive either..."

"Well, it was going to happen sometime, wasn't it? Why not now? It is your birthday after all."

"I still think this whole 'birthday' thing isn't a big deal. I mean, everyone else's birthdays don't seem to be celebrated often, so why mine?"

"Because you're liked by a lot of people in the Seireitei."

I looked at him questioningly, but he just passed it off with a sigh and walked out the door, "Might as well follow him. After all, he never did say where we were going... so we're gonna end up lost."

"Aw, crap."

13th Squad Barracks

February 14th, 2010

"Oi! Wake up damn it!" The door to my room slammed open and I glanced over at the shadowy figure. I growled and slammed my pillow over my head to block out the light.

"Nazeka! Wake up! Do you have any idea what time it is!"

"Um... time for you to go the hell away? I'm sleeping, dammit!"

The pillow was ripped from my head and a hand grabbed my arm and pulled me to a sitting position, "It's one in the afternoon! Why the hell are you still in bed!"

"Because I only got two hours of sleep last night! So I'm making it up now. I even asked Ukitake-taicho, and he said it was fine."

"You promised me you'd help me out with my paperwork since that...that... that lame excuse for a lieutenant won't help me!"

"Good insult."

"Shut up!"

"Back at'cha. Go away Toushirou... I'm extremely tired."

"That's Hitsugaya-taicho."

"Like I give a damn. Go bother someone who cares."

"You promised!"

"Matsumoto-san it your lieutenant, so she's your problem! Tell her to do her own paperwork and leave me out of it! I have enough to do!"

"But you said-!"

"Toushirou!" I screamed, my temper rising, "When I say leave me alone, it means leave me alone! I'm tired, I'm in a horrible mood, I don't want to look at another piece of paper for as long as my afterlife shall live, and you're really not making it any better! So unless you want to end up getting cut up with my zanpakutou, then I suggest you get the hell outta here!" I grabbed my zanpakutou and unsheathed it, pointing it at Toushirou's face.

"N-No need to go that far... jeez... are you really that cranky?" He looked down the sharp blade level with the space between his eyes.

"Have you ever seen me get mad?" I fumed. He shook his head, "Not like this..."

"You should be glad you haven't seen my bad side."

"This isn't your bad side?"

"Far from it. Now, before I really start to hate you, I suggest you get out of here. Come back and talk to me when I'm in a better mood and when I've gotten all my sleep!" I lowered my sword and sheathed it, set it next to my bed, and got inside the covers. I pulled the sheets over my head and moaned, "Just go away now."

"Fine. Raising your sword at a captain... If I wasn't your friend, I could have you arrested for that..." He muttered.

I heard the door slam close and his footsteps disappear down the hall. I groaned and tried to go back to sleep, but the longer I laid there, the more awake I became.

"So... gonna tell him sorry and go help him? 'Cause now you're awake."

"Not after how angry I got. Jeez, he'll never let me live it down if that happens."

"Yeah, but are you just going to sit here for hours doing nothing? I'd go and help him. I'm sure he'll forgive you. And if you don't... I'll sit here and ramble off all my 'corny' jokes. So, what did the mother buffalo say to her son?"

"ARGH! I get it! I'll go!"

"Wait, can I finish this one? Okay, she said, 'Bison!' Get it? Get it?"

"Utter one more word and I will go in there and kick you in the face. I swear I'm gonna die one day listening to your jokes," I muttered. I put away my bed and got dressed, sliding on my lieutenant badge and grabbing my sandals. I left the barracks after explaining where I was going to Ukitake-taicho, and then headed for Toushirou's office. When I reached the door, I stood there for quite some time, trying to swallow my pride and apologize.

After awhile, I opened the door and took a deep breath, stepping inside. He looked up and raised an eyebrow before going back to work on the stacks of paper crowding his desk.

"What do you want?" He asked. The tension in the air was so thick, it almost hurt. I scratched the back of my head and sighed, "A-After you left... I couldn't fall asleep again, so I came to help... well, that and the fact that Syugoryuu threatened to bombard me with corny jokes until I came."

"So, you didn't come here because you wanted to keep your promise," He said quietly, not looking up.

"Well... since I'm here, I can do that too."

"I'm not sure I like your reasoning."

"Excuse me, at least I'm here ready to help you!" I folded my arms, but then immediately put them down and sighed again, "I guess I'm just trying to apologize, and it's not working out so well."

"You've had trouble doing that over the years."

"You've had an attitude problems ever since Kusaka died."

He raised an eyebrow again, this time in annoyance. I held up my hands, "Right, my bad."

"Never mind. Your stack is over there on Matsumoto's desk," He pointed to the single stack on her desk with his brush. I sat down at her desk and picked up the first paper asking, "So, where is Matsumoto-san?"

"She's out drinking with some friends... as usual."

"Ah," I began working on the paper when my stomach growled... quite loud actually. I held my it tight, but it only growled louder, "I haven't eaten all day... great..."

"Your fault for skipping meals before you came over."

"Can't I grab something before I start?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"C'mon! I just want some food!"

"No!"

I pouted and looked back down at my paper before muttering, "If only I could have some Teriyaki Udon... agh, I'm drooling just thinking about it..."

"You know what I'd like?"

"What?"

"A nice cold glass of shut the hell up."

I thought about that for awhile before replying, "Good one."

"Thank you."

Our moments of sarcasm were often like that. If it was clever or amusing, we'd comment on them before going back to whatever conversation or argument we were having. I smiled and continued to work on the papers, trying to hold in the growls coming from my stomach.

I woke up to find myself on a couch with a blanket draped over me. I yawned and sat up, confused. I was still in Toushirou's office, but I couldn't remember how I ended up on the couch. I turned around to face the desk behind the couch, but Toushirou wasn't there. The door opened behind me and I suddenly smelled my favorite food: Teriyaki Udon. I turned around to see Toushirou smirking and holding a plate of probably the most delicious food on the planet.

"I asked the kitchen to make you this."

"Seriously! You're the best!" I took the plate and the chopsticks and dug in, saying with my mouth full, "Itadakimasu*!"

"Your welcome," he said quietly as he sat on the couch across from me and went back into his normal frown.

"Hey, something the matter?" I asked, but he shook his head. I tried to start up a conversation again, "So, how did I end up on the couch?"

"You fell asleep while finishing the last few documents. I moved you to the couch because you were getting ink all over your face."

I stiffened and felt my cheek, trying to see if there was still some left. He scratched his head, "I wiped it off. You would've gotten ink all over the couch."

"Oh, so that's the only reason, huh?" I asked slyly, grinning. His face went red, "Yes, that's the only reason! Jeez..."

"I'm just joking," I laughed. I finished up the plate of food and set it down on the table.

"Ukitake wanted you to go back to his office. He sent one of the third seats over here to tell you, but you were asleep."

"Why didn't you say something earlier!" I stood up and walked to the door, "See you later! And thanks for everything."

He nodded, and I left, smiling. Thanks, Toushirou. You're nicer than you let people think.

Ukitake's Office

July 2nd, 2010

"Um... you wanted to see me?" I asked my captain, and he ushered me into the room.

"Nazeka, I need to discuss something with you."

"Yes?" I asked, sitting down in the chair next to his desk. He leaned forward and folded his hands, "Rukia was sent to the World of the Living under your orders, correct?"

"Well... yes. You were sick and so when I had to assign people, I assigned Rukia to area 323.2 in Karakura Town, Japan. You even agreed and asked Kuchiki-taicho if he was fine with it, and he was."

"Yes, yes, but here's the problem. Rukia Kuchiki has violated a major law in the Soul Society. She's transferred her shinigami powers into a human-"

"She's done what now? Why would she do that? I mean, there's gotta be a logical explanation. Rukia would never do something that stupid unless she had a good reason-"

"Nazeka." He interrupted, and started coughing.

"Sorry."

"Lieutenant Abarai and Byakuya Kuchiki are going to investigate down in the World of the Living to see what's the problem. But, if they have to bring her back..."

"She's going to be imprisoned by Central 46, isn't she... and then..."

"And then executed. Correct. They will kill the human she transferred her powers to as well."

"Poor kid."

"Well, I need you to do me a favor."

"What's that?"

"I need you to find out from Abarai and Kuchiki what they plan to do to Rukia and where she will be kept. When they come back, I need you to find out Rukia's situation. Maybe we can get her out of this."

"Right. I'll start on this right away, taicho," I stood up and left the room, grabbing my sandals and walking over to the sixth squad's barracks. Renji had been moved from squad to squad over the years. He had started out in the fifth squad, but was then moved to the eleventh squad. Now he's become lieutenant of the sixth squad.

I entered the barracks, getting a lot of strange stares from the shinigami there, since it was unusual for me to be there. I asked a few people for where I could find Renji, but they all shrugged and said they had no idea. So, instead, I just went to Kuchiki-taicho's office, where I found only the captain... a very scary moment.

He merely looked up for a second before ducking his head back down to focus on his paperwork, so I took the initiative to ask him about Rukia.

"Um, Kuchiki-taicho, I've been asked by my captain to find out more about what you and Ren-er, Abarai plan on doing with Rukia in the World of the Living. Also, once you come back with her, where will she be staying?" I bowed slightly in respect, absolutely terrified.

"We will do what is necessary, according to what happens."

"Meaning...?"

He looked up with a bored expression, "She will be dealt with according to our law."

"Oh. And um... about where she will be kept...?"

"She will be imprisoned here in the sixth squad's prison. That has been ordered by Central 46."

"I see. Thank you very much, Kuchiki-taicho," I left immediately, closing the door behind me and sighed, "He is one of the scariest captains I have ever met... not including Kenpachi-taicho or Kurotsuchi-taicho. They're a different story," I walked down the hall not too far before passing the familiar talking red pineapple.

"What are you doing here?" He questioned.

"Oh, hey Renji. I'm here on business from Ukitake-taicho. Hey, um, can I ask you something?"

"Um, sure?"

I waved my hand for him to come closer, and I quietly asked, "Does Kuchiki-taicho scare you at all?"

"Taicho? No. In fact, he's my enemy."

"Your... enemy?"

"Yeah. I'm determined to defeat him one day. I have to keep training though..."

"Did he kick your ass?" I asked knowingly.

"Very harshly yesterday..."

"Well, good luck with that one Renji. I can't help you there. Anyway, I gotta get going. I need to tell Ukitake-taicho what I found out."

"Alright. Bye, Nazeka."

"See ya."

I walked out of the barracks and into my own, entering the office to see Ukitake still sitting at his desk. Do the captains do anything but paperwork? I sat on the couch that was turned away from him and kneeled on the cushions, looking over the back.

"Something wrong, Nazeka?"

"Kuchiki-taicho is so scary..." I muttered. Ukitake laughed and set down his brush, "So, I take it you found out something already?"

"It wasn't hard. Kuchiki-taicho said that Rukia will be dealt with according to the law of the Soul Society, and she'll be kept in the sixth squad's prison."

"I see... Nazeka, how much do you know about the Seireitei's government?"

"Um, what they taught me in the academy. I know the major laws and such, and I know that if you break certain ones, you will go under trial of Central 46 and have options such as execution. And I know that the execution takes place on the Sokyouku hill, but I don't know what happens."

"When you are executed on Sokyouku hill, you are placed on the wooden beam that you can see all the way down here. The Sokyouku is released from its binds and it disintegrates the soul completely. It's not a normal death. It's rare when a person is executed this way."

"Oh. And... how come you asked me about this?"

"Because the punishment that Rukia is going to receive, is this execution."

"W-What!"

He nodded.

"B-But like I said before, there's gotta be a reason she would've done such a horrible crime!"

"I know. But we're going to have to wait until Rukia's brought back here to hear what she has to say. For now, just don't think about it and relax. I'm sure we can figure out some way to save her."

Sixth Squad's Prison

July 19th, 2010

"Renji! Let me damn it!"

"No! My orders are to keep everyone out except those on duty here!"

I shoved him backward, "Well my orders are to talk to Rukia! Renji, you're pissing me off! Let me in there! Damn you!" I yelled when he shoved me back by the head, but instead of falling, I bumped into something bigger than me.

"What is going on?"

I froze when I heard the cold, calm voice behind me, and I looked at Renji's slightly scared expression, "Sorry, taicho. I didn't realize you were there."

I stiffened even more when I heard him say 'taicho'. Oh man, he's right behind me... and to make it even worse... I was knocked into him! Crap! No, forget crap, holy shit this bad!

"You're dead."

You think!

I bit my lower lip and turned around to see Kuchiki-taicho glaring down at me. Yep, glaring down at me. Why did he have to be so much taller than me! It was bad enough with his attitude, but whenever I was near him, he was two heads taller than me, so I felt so small!

"Ah, sorry, Kuchiki-taicho."

"I asked what was going on, Renji," He went back to staring at his lieutenant.

"Nazeka wants to see the prisoner, but I told her no since you said only those at their posts inside the jail can see her."

"I was ordered by Ukitake-taicho to talk to her! I have to follow orders! Please, Kuchiki-taicho, you have to let me in," I begged, backing away from him to give him room. There's no way I'm getting in... not after what happened... His face was completely impassive as he said, "Let her in, Renji."

"What?" We both asked in astonishment. Renji sputtered, "B-But captain!"

"I said it's fine. Do you have some other reason to not let her in?"

"That sounds like a death threat."

It does, strangely enough.

"No, sir... I-I'll let her in," He muttered. Renji stepped aside and I bowed to Kuchiki-taicho, "Thank you so much, sir!" I walked past Renji, pulling down my eyelid and sticking out my tongue as I passed. His lip twitched, but he didn't say or do anything. I wandered down the row of cells, looking for Rukia's; it wasn't long until I found her. She was sitting with her back to me in the single small chair-the only piece of furniture in the whole cell. She wasn't even wearing the normal shinigami uniform; instead, she was wearing a simple white yukata.

"Rukia?" I tapped on the bars, and she turned around, "Nazeka! You got in?"

"Yeah."

"I heard you and Renji arguing, but once you guys stopped yelling, I couldn't hear anything."

"You heard all that?"

"Yeah. So, what did you come here to ask me?"

I looked around for a spare chair, and I found one further down the hallway. I held up a finger and ran down to get it, bringing it back and sitting down in front of bars. She had turned her chair around to face me by the time I got back.

"Ukitake-taicho and I want to know your side of the story. We think we may be able to get you out of this mess."

"I don't think that's possible."

"What, you don't believe in us? Your superiors? C'mon, have a little faith in us. Tell me what happened while you were in the World of the Living."

"Well, I was just fulfilling normal duties. I took care of any Hollows, and I made sure that all of the souls were sent here. But one day, I met this guy. He could see Hollows and souls, even me. His name is-er, sorry... was-Ichigo Kurosaki. He was fifteen.

"But the same night I met him, the strangest thing happened. I couldn't sense a nearby Hollow, even though the spiritual pressure was enormous. Once I left his side though, I could sense it extremely well. It attacked his sisters and was going to eat the one with more reiatsu. I stopped him from doing anything reckless by putting a binding spell on him, but he just broke it. He attacked the Hollow, trying to get it to go after him instead of his sister. I tried to get Ichigo to stop, because the Hollow was going to bite him in half; he didn't listen, so I went out there and stepped in front of him. The Hollow bit my shoulder instead, but I ended up damaging its face as well. It was a pretty deep cut-my injury-and I panicked, so I ended up losing more of my strength than I intended. Unless I did something fast, Ichigo, his family, the soul of a girl that almost ended up as its food, and me would all be devoured. So, I did the only thing I could do. I gave him my shinigami powers."

I sat there and thought about the situation. I don't think that with that situation...

"Um, Rukia... I would like to say that it was the only thing you could do but... you could've used kido, or used a healing kido on your shoulder, so you could recover and take out the Hollow... and you could've taken out the Hollow before he attacked it instead of hesitating. I'm sorry, but as much as I'd like to say that that was a legitimate reason, it isn't."

"I know. I'm sorry, Mamori-fukutaicho."

Normally, I wouldn't let her get away with my title, but with this... I needed to show my authority.

"I'll let Ukitake-taicho know, but first..." I leaned in, "Tell me more about this Ichigo guy."

"Oh, sure. He has short, spiky orange hair-"

"Wait... orange?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I've seen some weird hair colors, so I guess this doesn't surprise me. Hey, wanna know a secret?"

"What?"

"Nemu told me that Kurotsuchi-taicho has blue hair underneath all that weird stuff!"

"Really?"

"Yeah! But, continue with Ichigo."

"Okay. Well, he's very tall, and his dad is a total knucklehead, but... as for Ichigo, he's serious most of the time. When he smiles, it's a smirk. He hides his feelings a lot, but he tries to be happy when around his sisters. He cares for them a lot, and same with his friends. He's not exactly happy about dealing with shinigami duties, but he gets the job done well. He makes fun of my drawings too."

"Wow, seems you've learned a lot about him."

"I attended school with him. I had to blend in since I was going to be there until my powers returned."

"Ahuh... how was high school?"

"Horrible! You learn a bunch of pointless things like... like algebra. I mean, what the hell is that going to do for you?"

I started laughing, "You're frame of mind is just like every other high schooler's by the sounds of it. I hated high school too, though I was only there for half the normal time. It's horrible, I tell ya."

"That's right. You went to the high school in Karakura too!"

"Yeah. What's it like down there?"

"You have to wear grey uniforms. The girls have to wear short skirts, and a bow-tie, but you have a choice of either a sweater or a jacket to wear over your white shirts. As for the guys, they have to wear ties and grey pants. They also can wear a sweater or a jacket."

"Huh... I guess they changed it. When I was there, there were longer skirts and we had to wear a sweater. We also had to wear a tie, like the guys. There weren't any jackets... and the guys had to wear khaki pants instead of grey."

"Well, the building was all shiny too. It looked pretty new to me. Maybe they tore down the old school and rebuilt a new one."

"Maybe. Anyway, I better get back to the captain. Good luck, Rukia-chan!"

"Thanks, Nazeka!"

*Itadakimasu means 'thank you for the food'... or something similar. That's what I learned at least.


	11. LIAR

10th Squad Barracks

August 29th, 2010

The clacking of the alarm made me jump as I was about to sip my tea. I groaned while I set my cup down and looked at Toushirou, "What do you think this is about?"

"Who knows?"

I listened for the announcement and sighed, breathing in the fresh air. We were sitting outside in the garden beside his office. Toushirou for once asked Matsumoto to leave, asking her to go out and drink with her friends. So, it was just the two of us, if you don't count the shinigami passing by every once in a while.

"Attention! Red alert! Red alert! Intruders detected in Western Rukongai! This is not a drill! Repeat, red alert! Breach detected in West Rukongai!"

I groaned and stood up, Toushirou doing the same.

"Nazeka, if you see Matsumoto, make sure she finds me over by the eastern barracks."

"Right," I replied, immediately becoming serious. He flash-stepped away, while I ran to my own barracks, flash-stepping every once in a while to make it faster. I didn't see Matsumoto at all, so I continued for home. I reached the office and slammed the door open, looking for Ukitake. He was just getting out of his chair.

"Sir! Where do you want me to go?"

"Squad Nine has already secured the Hakudo Gate, so there's no need to go anywhere outside the barracks. However, alert everyone to be prepared just in case we're needed. Ready a group and then report back to me."

"Yes sir!"

I flash-stepped over to the main house where most of the shinigami in our squad stayed during the day. They were all there, standing around and waiting for our orders.

"Everyone! Taicho has asked that you stay prepared, just in case we are needed! I will pick a group. Those who I choose will stay here ready for any assignment our captain gives us! Is that understood!"

"Yes ma'am!" They all replied. I love our squad... I smiled inwardly. They were so well behaved. I asked for the two third seats, who immediately joined me at the front.

"Kotetsu, Kotsubaki. You two are to stay with taicho as I will be handling everything else. Is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Of course."

"Thanks," I turned to the rest of the group and yelled, "Mizuko! Amaya! Daisuke! Hayate! To the front!"

The four shinigami stepped forward.

"You four are my group. Wait for any directions the captain may give you. Wait for me here. I have to go back."

They nodded, and I flash-stepped back to the office, "Taicho."

"Nazeka, right now we just have to sit and wait for other orders."

"Understood. So, uh... why would there be intruders?"

"I don't know."

"Do you think it could be the boy that Rukia gave her powers to?"

He stiffened, "I thought Byakuya said he killed him."

"Rukia said that too, but you never know. Maybe he survived."

"Survived a captain?"

"Well... when you say it that way, it does sound ridiculous."

"I think it's someone else."

I sat down on the couch, "Well, we'll find out sooner or later."

We waited about an hour before a Hell butterfly flew into the room. It perched on my outstretched finger and I relayed the message to Ukitake, "Attention, all squad captains and lieutenants. The ryouka has been averted for the time being. It is now staying in Junrin'an. Do not make any attempt to attack or take things into your own hands, lest you be punished."

"Thank you."

The Hell butterfly flew off and left, probably to say the same thing to some other captain and lieutenant.

"Sir, shall I go tell the others?"

"Yes."

"Alright, sir."

I flash-stepped out of the room to the main house and shouted, "The commands are to stand down. The ryouka was averted for now. You may continue on with your daily duties for now. Be aware that there might be more commands in the future. That is all."

They all dispersed while I walked back to the office, slowly. Damn that ryouka. Getting us all worked up for nothing...

"It's not it's fault. It's Yamamoto-soutaicho's fault. He's the one who got so worked up with this stuff."

Yeah, but the ryouka was the one who caused him to get worked up.

"I guess."

Whatever. I'm pissed right now, so I'm done talking to you.

"Fine."

13th Squad Barracks

The next day

Another Hell butterfly landed on my finger while I was sitting in the office. Captain Ukitake had gotten sick yesterday after the ryouka event, so I was in charge again. I was completely on edge with the ryouka still at large. What was I supposed to do? I'd never commanded a whole squad by myself before. Maybe I could go ask Toushirou or Kyouraku-taicho for some advice, since Ukitake was asleep.

I listened to the message the Hell butterfly was carrying.

"Attention. All captains are to attend an emergency captain's meeting tomorrow at dawn. I repeat, attention. All captains are to attend an emergency captain's meeting tomorrow at dawn." It flew away and I groaned, "But Ukitake-taicho's sick! And I'm not allowed to go to those meetings..."

There was a knock at the door, and it slid open. Hisagi-fukutaicho of the ninth squad walked in, carrying some papers.

"Eh? Hisagi-san?"

"Oh, Mamori-san, these papers are from Tousen-taicho. They're for Ukitake-taicho."

"I'll take them."

"Ukitake-taicho not feeling well?" He asked as he handed me the small stack.

"Unfortunately." I glanced at the three scars covering his right eye and cheek. An immediate sense of guilt welled up inside me.

"Well, I hope he gets better soon."

"Thanks, Hisagi-san."

"Hisagi."

"Right. Hisagi," I muttered, "Then call me Nazeka, instead of Mamori-san."

"Alright. Hey, something wrong?"

"N-Nothing. I'm just feeling a little nervous. If something happens, then I'm in charge and... well, I've never commanded a whole squad during an attack on the Seireitei before."

"Some of the newer captains haven't either, but we trust their judgment, don't we?"

"Yeah."

"Then just think of yourself as a new captain. Your squad trusts you, and we trust your judgment."

"Thanks, Hisagi."

"No problem. Now, I gotta go back to Tousen-taicho. See ya later, Nazeka."

"Bye." He shut the door behind him and I waited until I couldn't hear his footsteps any more. I collapsed on the couch with the papers and sighed, "It's the first time I was in a room with just him, and now I feel super guilty about those scars. They're my fault... if I had listened to him, he wouldn't have those."

"You don't know that. He could've gotten them some other way. Fate works in mysterious ways."

Yeah, whatever. You're just saying that to make me feel better.

"I'm your zanpakutou. I'm supposed to resolve any problems within your inner world. And right now, it's raining. Hard. Dammit, stop feeling guilty! Your inner world is getting drenched!"

Okay, okay, I'll try. It's easier said than done you know. Sorry.

"Try telling that to my sopping wet mane and fur. That, my friend, was an unnecessary bath."

So, do my emotions always affect my inner world?

"Yeah. When you're happy, it's sunny and bright. When your sad or guilty, it rains; when you're angry, it becomes painfully hot and dry: enough to dry my small pool of water at the top of the tower."

Wow. I never knew that.

"Well now you know. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go and fly around a little bit while I rid my fur of rainwater."

Sorry.

I stood up and put the papers on Ukitake's desk. For a few seconds, I sat down in his chair and imagined what it would be like to be captain. Being captain wouldn't be too bad... No! I don't want to be captain! I don't want to be a shinigami! I jumped up out of the chair and shook my head, taking a look at the papers. They were all things that had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with the captains. Resignations, deaths, and new shinigami yet to be recruited were listed on the papers. There were very few new shinigami. In fact, it was kinda sad.

"Oh well, we just won't have too many newbies this year. Less work for me, I suppose."

1st Squad Barracks

The next day

"Ah, Nazeka? What are you doing here? I thought Ukitake-taicho was sick," Hisagi asked, and I leaned against the railing on the bridge. Many of the lieutenants were sitting in the 1st Squad's garden outside the hallway to the meeting room. The only person missing was Yachiru, the eleventh squad's lieutenant.

"He is, but he asked me to ask one of the captains when they came out what they talked about since he wouldn't be attending. Especially since it's an emergency meeting."

"Oh."

"But, Nazeka, I thought lieutenants are forbidden to hear what they talked about during the captains' meetings," Momo asked.

"If your captain asks, it's an exception," Nemu explained.

The rest of the lieutenants nodded. Momo giggled, "Oh, I guess I was the only one that didn't know that."

"So, has anyone heard anything more about the ryouka?" Kira asked, and we all shook our heads.

"There hasn't been a single mention of the ryouka since the attack. Maybe it's dead?"

"I don't think so. Yamamoto-soutaicho would've let us know."

"Yeah, but you think this would be a bigger deal, right? I mean, an intruder in the Soul Society? That doesn't happen every day."

"But what is it's purpose? What is it after?"

"You think... maybe it's here to kill the king?"

"If that were true, then you think it'd come more prepared than feebly attempting to come into the Seireitei. It'd have to find the key too."

"That's true. Then what?"

"I think it's after Rukia. And I think I know who it is, too," Renji spoke up. He stood up, "It's that kid, Ichigo Kurosaki. Maybe he survived somehow. I don't like to believe it, but that's a major possibility."

"You think Kuchiki-taicho failed in killing the human?"

"I'm just saying, it's a possibility."

The alarm suddenly sounded, and everyone listened, "Red alert. Red alert. The Seireitei has been breached. All squads report to battle stations immediately. Repeat. This is a red alert. All squads report to battle stations immediately." The alarm continued to sound and the announcement was repeated again and again.

"What!" We all stood up and watched as Kenpachi ran down the hallway and out of the first squad's barracks. Every lieutenant found their captain and followed them out of the barracks as well. I did the same, and found everyone staring up at the sky where a huge ball was flying: coming right at the Seireitei. I watched as the ball hit the spiritual membrane and then burst. Only after several minutes did several pieces go flying in different directions.

"The... the ryouka got through..." I muttered, amazed. I had never heard of someone actually getting inside the Seireitei by force. I flash-stepped to Ukitake's room, immediately, knocking on the door and entering without waiting for a response. He was sitting in the center of the room, covered by a blanket and holding a cup of tea.

"Sir! The ryouka broke through the membrane of the Seireitei! It seems there are several ryouka, and they all scattered throughout the Soul Society. What should I do?"

"Nothing."

"Yes sir-er... wait, what?"

"Did any of them land near here?"

"No. There were over by the eleventh, eighth, and third squads, as well as an uninhabited area near the second squad."

"Then there's no reason for us to do anything. The rest of the squads are perfectly capable of taking care of the ryouka near them."

"Yeah, but..."

"Nazeka. Did you think that we were the only capable squad? If anything, because I'm sick most of the time, and you've never had any experience dealing with things like this, we're not at all the most capable."

I sat down on the floor and bowed my head, "Sorry, taicho. I guess I just... just wanted to make sure I did everything I could."

Ukitake sighed, "It's alright. So, since I'm assuming that you came right here after the ryouka entered, you didn't ask a captain what was discussed during the meeting, did you?"

"Um... no, sir."

"Then go find out."

"Yes sir," I flash-stepped out of the room and to Toushirou's office. I looked inside, but he wasn't there, so I ran to Kyouraku-taicho's office. He wasn't in his office either, but Nanao-fukutaicho was.

"Oh! Nanao-san! Have you seen Kyouraku-taicho?"

She looked up and pushed her glasses farther up the bridge of her nose, "Well, last I saw, he was heading to the library. He said he was looking up the number of humans that were given shinigami powers like that boy the sixth squad was ordered to kill."

"Thanks!"

"Er, Nazeka-san, why are you looking for him?"

"I have to ask him about the meeting earlier for Ukitake-taicho."

"Oh, right. Well, good luck finding him!"

"Thanks again!" I ran out the door and onto the streets but froze. I had only been to the library once, and that was with Ukitake. I had no idea where it was!

Okay... think... think... argh, it's no use. I can't remember which way we went! I'll just have to take the best guess I can. Um... left... or right... Okay, left to head back to the barracks, right to go to the seventh squad's barracks... after that it's a four-way street... straight to the sixth squad, right to the um... I think over to one of the gates... and left to the inner part of the Seireitei. If I go left... oh yeah! The library's in there!

I ran down the street following my mental map of the Seireitei (with all it's blank spots...) and finally reached the stairs to the inner section. In Inner Seireitei, there's the Central 46's headquarters, their sleeping area, the library, the mental asylum (I will never set a foot near that place... it's too creepy.), and the way to Sokyoku hill. After climbing the stairs, I passed the gate to Central 46, and I could immediately sense tension between them and myself.

"Those damn people in Central 46. I hate them so much."

"Any reason why?"

I nearly jumped three times my height from the voice behind me. I spun around to see Toushirou standing there with one eyebrow raised.

"Dammit, why did you do that?"

"I was just talking to you."

"Well, don't sneak up on people!" I sputtered, "A-Anyway, how did you find me here?"

"Followed your reiatsu," He said simply. I narrowed my eyes and muttered, "Stalker."

"If anyone's the stalker, it's you. You spend more time at my barracks than you do at your own."

"That is not true!"

"Yes it is, and you know it. So, why do you hate Central 46?"

"Because," I said flatly, blushing at the thought.

He caught it, "You're blushing. And 'because' is not a decent answer. Why do you hate Central 46?"

"I hate them because... because of what they did to you. I mean, they killed off your best friend just because you guys had the same zanpakutou. They're all bastards! Every last one of them!" I could feel my face burn even more as I explained. He didn't change expressions at all.

"You hate them because of what happened to me?"

"Yeah."

"Shouldn't it be me who hates them?"

"Well, yeah, but the fact that someone hurt you makes me mad."

He smirked, but it faded and he looked me in the eye very seriously, "There's something I need to ask you about."

"What?"

He grabbed my hand pulled me into one of the vacant buildings nearby. He motioned for me to sit down, and he did as well, except not facing me. He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes. I was really confused, until I felt tired and fell asleep.

I found myself facing the giant space between both Toushirou's inner world and my own. He was standing across from me looking down at the icy ground on his side.

"Why'd you pull us in here? I would think that abandoned building would be enough..."

"Because, this has to do with the barrier separating our worlds, as well as the connection."

He sounded so sad when he said that. I pressed my hand up against the barrier, and I immediately felt my reiatsu sink. I pulled away and looked at my hand.

"That's one of the reasons I need to talk to you. Hyourinmaru said that Syugoryuu left out a major detail. Remember how they said our reiatsu would skyrocket or deplete? Well, the person who loses their reiatsu will lose so much, that even their existence is endangered. They will be left with barely any strength. Hyourinmaru said that the last person to try that barely had the strength to keep his heart beating. It's extremely dangerous."

I didn't say anything, too shocked to really find my voice. He continued, " Anyway, that's not the main reason I wanted to talk to you."

"Then what is it?" I muttered.

"Nazeka... you... you lied to me, didn't you?"

"L-Lie?"

"The first time we learned all this, that night it stormed. I asked you about the 'drawn together' part. You said I dreamed it, but Syugoryuu said you lied."

"Syugoryuu told you that?"

"Yeah. I can't believe it Nazeka. Why would you lie to me about that? That's something I should know about you know."

"Toushirou, I-"

"Dammit, why the hell? Why couldn't you tell me? Did you think it would change what would happen in the future?" He asked furiously, and I could tell he wanted to break through that barrier so badly.

"Because I thought that you wouldn't... you wouldn't really love me in the end. That you wouldn't really care. I mean, if you knew that we'd be drawn together since the beginning, I felt that you wouldn't love me truly. It's... It's hard to explain..."

"You didn't trust that I would fall in love with you the same way any one else would? Then what about you? You knew about it, so you could've been the one to not really love me."

"But I wasn't going to let it affect the way my emotions work."

"Well neither am I! I can't believe that you're so selfish! Damn it..." He gritted his teeth and disappeared, leaving me alone to stare at the cold tundra that served as his inner world. A huge gust of wind caught me from behind, and a soft furry head rested on my shoulder. I placed my hand on Syugoryuu's snout and scratched him gently before he lifted his head and looked at the sky. Thunderheads covered the sky and soon, the whole place was being drenched with rain.

"Come on, you need to go somewhere where you won't get wet."

"...You told him..."

"You weren't going to get away with it. You know that, don't you? And Toushirou needed to know. It's better he found out now rather than later."

The rain fell harder, completely soaking both me and Syugoryuu. He snorted and picked me up by the neck of my kosode and dragged me up to the top of the tower.

"I have to tell you-" Syugoryuu began, but I cut in, "You... You told him..." I growled, my body shaking. The rain stopped and all the water immediately dried up as the heat rose. Even I became completely dry in seconds.

"Yes, I told him. We get it."

The heat rose even higher, and I could feel my own spiritual pressure rise with it. Syugoryuu roared and hissed, his mane standing on end all the way down his back. I drew my sword and screamed, "Syugoryuu!"

I flash-stepped next to him and brought down my sword, aiming for his neck. He slithered away fast enough and chomped down on the metal, yelping as he did so.

"Let go, Syugoryuu!"

He didn't say anything, but kept growling, holding on tight to my zanpakutou. I felt a surge of rage and wrenched my sword from his teeth, kicking him in the snout and jumping backwards. He snapped his jaws several inches from my face, but I swung at this nose again. His tail whipped around and knocked the sword from my hands and over the side of the tower. He flew over and picked me up again, taking me down to the gate and dropping me there. A hand grabbed the neck of my kosode pulled me backwards, my reiatsu wavering up and down like crazy. I writhed and screamed, struggling against the hand, but another hand covered my mouth, stifling me.

"Nazeka, calm down, dammit," Syugoryuu growled.

I pried at the hand covering my mouth, but the hand moved and grabbed one of my hands, the other one holding onto my kosode letting go and grabbing my other hand. One of them grabbed my sleeves, keeping me from moving while the hand returned to my mouth as I was about to start a screaming fit.

"Sorry about that. She gets that from me," Syugoryuu said to the person behind me, and I heard an icy voice reply, "That's okay. As long as she doesn't get too out of hand, she's fine."

I tried to bite the hand over my mouth, but I couldn't get it from that angle, so I quit.

"Pull her farther in, and she'll calm down. She can't do much when she's losing her energy from loss of reiatsu."

I felt the hands pull on me and I could feel my reiatsu sink farther than ever before. I fell to my knees and the hands let go. I turned my head to the gate and saw Toushirou standing there, completely expressionless.

"How did you-come into-my inner-world? I-thought we-couldn't-do that," I panted.

"I balanced it out. If your reiatsu sunk, I would step in farther, and it would balance out. If my reiatsu sunk, I would pull your hands in farther to my inner world."

"I thought-you were-mad at me."

"I couldn't have you attacking your own zanpakutou just because you were upset," He said coldly, looking at Syugoryuu, who was picking my sword up out of the ground. He dropped it next to me and began trying to lick his snout where I cut him. His tongue wasn't long enough to reach it, so he just brushed it with the fur on his tail.

"I'm going back," Toushirou said suddenly, and I thought about what I was supposed to be doing. Ukitake was still waiting for me to return with what was discussed in the captain's meeting.

"Wait, Toushirou!"

He didn't respond, but just looked at Syugoryuu, "I leave her to you."

"Of course."

He's ignoring me now... do I have to call him by his title? I groaned inwardly and tried again, "Wait, Hitsugaya-taicho!"

"What?" He asked, annoyed.

"Ukitake-taicho wanted me to ask a captain what was discussed in the captain's meeting. Do you think you could tell me?"

"Whatever. It was a discussion on Gin Ichimaru's actions. He attacked the ryouka boy against orders and failed to kill him. He's getting away with it for now, just because of the sudden intrusion by the ryouka. There will be another meeting later."

He disappeared immediately after he said that. I picked up my sword and sheathed it, and Syugoryuu glided to my side.

"You know, you better start working on learning your bankai."

"Why?"

"Because, you've been lieutenant for quite some time now. It's time you learn."

"Look, I know that Yamamoto-soutaicho wants me to be a captain, but there aren't any open positions. There are thirteen captains for all thirteen squads. There's no room for me. I'll learn bankai when I'm needed. Anyway, I better get back and tell Ukitake what they discussed. No visiting Kyouraku-taicho today... Bye Syugoryuu," I said, disappearing from his sight.


	12. Confusion

I sat in the garden outside my bedroom and watched as a Hell butterfly came and landed gently on my finger.

"Attention. There will be a Lieutenant meeting in thirty minutes at the first squad's barracks," The black butterfly flew off my finger and up over the fence. I stood up and stretched, grabbing my zanpakutou from the porch beside me. My reiatsu had finally returned to normal ever since that incident inside my inner world earlier that morning.

What a crazy day, I thought, With the ryouka entering the Seireitei and shinigami running every which way to stop them... I suppose I'm glad that Ukitake said to not do anything. I'd be worn out... but then again... I'm bored... Well, off to the lieutenant meeting. That'll at least keep me occupied.

I walked down the streets, meeting up with Renji and Kira half-way there. They greeted me and asked me how the captain was doing. I answered, but we quickly skipped to the subject about the ryouka.

"Any news?" I asked, but Kira and Renji both shook their heads.

"We thought you might know."

"No, I haven't heard anything about them since this morning."

"Yeah, you certainly left in a hurry after they made it inside."

"I had to go let Ukitake-taicho know. But he informed me that we didn't have to do anything since they ryouka landed near the other squads."

"Oh, that would make sense," Kira said, "It was kind of funny. One second you were here, the next, you were gone. You just disappeared."

"Shunpo."

"Yeah, we figured," Renji said. He fixed his lieutenant badge absentmindedly, not really paying attention to the conversation since it had nothing to do with the Ryouka.

"So, Renji, any idea who the ryouka boy is?"

"It's Ichigo. I know it is."

"A pretty bold statement for someone who was ordered to eliminate him," I teased. He snorted, "Taicho was the one who made the final blow. If he's not dead, it's his fault."

"Yeah, sure."

"I'm serious! You can ask Rukia!"

"I would, but you know, ever since your captain allowed them to take his own sister to the repentance cell, I'm not allowed in there. I have to go with taicho if I want to."

"Look, I don't want her to die any more than you do."

"Then why do you act like you do when ever you're in front of her?"

He played with his badge again, avoiding the subject.

"You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd say that you're jealous of that Ichigo kid."

"Why the hell would I be jealous of that damn Ichigo!" He snapped, walking faster to avoid Kira and me. We caught up to him and I grabbed his sleeve, "You're certainly making it sound like you're jealous."

"Nazeka-san, I think you should stop..."

"Kira, shut up. Can't you see I'm busy trying to get answers out of pineapple head here?"

"Shut up!" Renji yelled, and I snickered, "That's right you giant red pineapple. I want answers out of you, and I want them now!"

"Well I know that a bunch of lieutenants want to know what your relationship is with Hitsugaya-taicho!"

"That's none of your concern!"

"Well neither is this, so stay out of other people's business!"

"I'll do what I want, Pineapple Head!"

"Midget!"

"Moocher!"

"What! I am not a moocher!"

"Hinamori's told me that every time you visit her barracks, you eat their food and don't even bother to help around the place! That sounds like mooching to me!"

"Guys! The meeting? Have you forgotten the reason we're walking down this road in the first place!" Kira broke in, pushing Renji and me down the road closer to the first squad's barracks. I folded my arms and sulked that I was being forced to stop arguing with Renji. I always won, since he failed at calling names. However, I can't say that I had many more names up my sleeve to call him.

"This isn't over, Mamori!"

"Whatever, Abarai!"

"Shut up you two and get through the damn door!" Kira pushed us through and I slid in to the back. Sasakibe-san, Matsumoto-san, Nemu-san, and Iba-san were already in the room. After us were Hinamori, Kotetsu-san, Hisagi, Nanao-san, Yachiru, and lastly, Oomaeda-san. We all stood around the room as Iemura, the third seat of the fourth squad, began the announcements.

"This is the latest situation report. Ikkaku Madarame and Yumichika Ayasegawa, both of squad eleven, have apparently been withdrawn from the front lines effective immediately. It's reported that both high-ranking officers have sustained serious injuries and a detailed damage assessment for the entire squad is currently underway. But at the moment, all we have to go on are unconfirmed preliminary reports of the day's action-which would seem to indicate that squad eleven was almost completely annihilated."

Everyone tensed at the thought of squad eleven being taken out.

"What! That's impossible!" Kira seemed to put into words what everyone was thinking while Momo muttered, "Not squad eleven..."

"How could a handful of ryouka have done so much damage in just a few hours?" Hisagi asked, and I nodded.

Oomaeda-san just picked his nose and scoffed, "That squad's pathetic!"

"Squad eleven is one of our strongest squads that deal with only physical strength and force. I doubt even you could have handled one of those ryouka," I said, and he growled, "Shut it, pipsqueak!"

"Three of the ryouka have been positively identified. And two of these have been known to have taken a member of squad four hostage. Intelligence indicates that this group is heading this way; however, since a short time ago, we have been unable to detect their reiatsu, so their whereabouts are now unknown."

"Obviously our intelligence leaves something to be desired," Matsumoto-san said. Iba-san replied, "You know, now that I think about it, it's been a while since our fourth seat has reported back in. We'd better send someone to check on the West 20 region. Who knows? He may have been defeated too."

"Are you serious? Isn't the fourth seat in your squad Jirobo? The 'Wind Scythe'?"

"That's right."

"First Jidanbo, now his brother? Can they both really have been defeated?" Hisagi asked.

"What the hell is going on here?" Kira asked.

"Obviously these ryouka aren't as easy to deal with as we thought."

"Well I've been trying to tell ya for years that the eleventh squad isn't all it's cracked up to be."

"Shut up, Oomaeda-san. I'd like to see you face those ryouka. Maybe then you'd take back what you said."

"Silence! This meeting is hereby dismissed!" Iemura shouted, folding up his paper and leaving the room. Kotetsu-san followed him, and soon, everybody left one by one. I looked around for Renji, still wanting to finish our dispute from earlier; however, he wasn't in the group. I tapped Momo on the shoulder, "Hey, have you seen Renji?"

"He left just before the meeting was dismissed out the back door. Is something wrong?"

"Nothing. I was just looking for him."

"I'm kind of worried. Renji never shirks his duties as a lieutenant."

"Well, I'm sure he's fine."

"Okay..."

"See you later," I said, running past , but someone grabbed my arm. Matsumoto-san pulled me aside and said, "Hey, uh, Nazeka... about taicho... what happened between the two of you? I know he had run off to go see you, but when he came back he was really upset..."

"Well um... Matsumoto-san-"

"Rangiku."

"Right... Rangiku, um... we kind of had a fight..."

"You two had a fight? About what?" She instantly perked at the thought of gossip. I groaned inwardly and said, "Well... it has to do with our zanpakutou... and when he was still in the Academy, I lied to him about mine... and he's upset that I lied to him."

"Well of course. I'd be upset if my girlfriend lied to me."

I raised an eyebrow, "What did you just say? We're not... dating... and we're certainly not boyfriend and girlfriend! That just sounds so... weird!"

"Then what are you two?"

I thought about what Renji had said earlier. 'Well I know that a bunch of lieutenants want to know what your relationship is with Hitsugaya-taicho!'

"We're... We're just friends. That's all," I said, rubbing the back of my head to pass it off.

"You and I both know that you're not serious. What's wrong about admitting that you're in love with taicho?"

"I am not 'in love'!"

"Then what then? If you're not 'in love' with him, how come I know that you two have kissed? More then once I might add."

"H-How did you know that!"

"I have my sources. Ukitake-taicho thinks that there's something going on between you two too. So, just admit that you love him. You should probably go and tell him now too. He's really not happy..."

"I told you I'm not in love with him! Leave me alone, Rangiku!" I yelled, pushing past her and running down the hall past the rest of the lieutenants that were still dispersing to their squads. Damn, why is she so persistent about that! I'm not in love with him! Why the hell should I be! If he gets upset over me lying to him, he should wake up and see that a bunch of people have probably lied to him over time. Kusaka included. Jeez...

"You know, Rangiku's right. It's about time you just admit it. You may not realize it, but whenever you guys kissed, it was more like a 'thank you' kiss; however, since I'm your zanpakutou, I know that you really liked it. You haven't wanted to admit that you're really in love with him since the very beginning."

Okay, you know that it's super awkward that you're talking about this... when you're a guy and you're my zanpakutou. Please stop.

"Not until you talk to him."

Must I endure the awkwardness? Really?

"Yes."

Fine, whatever, give it your best shot.

"My jokes are coming along for the ride too, you know."

WHAT! NO NO NO NO! I can deal with the awkwardness, but not your lame corny jokes! AGH!

"I win."

Whatever. No jokes. Go to sleep or something!

"I don't have to listen to you until you earn your bankai."

That sounds better and better the more you annoy me. When can we start?

"Just go talk to him. I'm not in the mood to help you with learning your bankai."

Yet you're in the mood to annoy me. Just go away already.

I walked down the streets and took a deep breath, panting ever so slightly from running. Footsteps could be heard in all directions as shinigami continued to move to different posts as the ryouka moved around the Seireitei. I passed another street that intersected into the one I was walking on, when suddenly I was tackled by two people. I fell to the ground and felt the other two people land on top of me.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!"

"Uh, Orihime, could you please get off me? We're crushing whoever's beneath us."

"Right!"

The weight lifted, and soon the person on top of me got up too. I picked myself up and brushed off my hakama.

"We're really sorry. I guess we weren't looking where we were going!"

"No, no, it's alright. I wasn't paying attention either," I looked up and saw in front of me two people who were definitely not shinigami. One was an orange-haired girl wearing a pink shirt and white gym pants and shoes. She had a chest that could easily rival Matsumoto's... and that was saying something. She also had two light blue hairpins on either side of her face. The boy had navy blue hair and glasses, and wore a strange white and blue outfit, with gloves and a small cape.

"Y-You're the ryouka! Or at least some of them!" I grabbed my hilt and pushed my sword slightly out of it's sheath with my left thumb. The girl called Orihime held up her hands, "W-Wait! Please, we're just here to-"

"It's no use Orihime, she's a soul reaper. She's supposed to attack us." The boy said, holding out his hand. A light formed around his hand and soon a bow took form. He aimed it right at me, but I just scoffed, "Tch, where're your arrows? You're not gonna do much with just a bow, cape boy!"

He scowled and put his hand at the bow, pulling back like he was pulling it taught. Sure enough, there was a light blue arrow made of reishi. My eyes widened as he aimed and fired; but I dodged the arrow for the most part-the arrow only singeing my sleeve.

"These are my arrows, shinigami."

"So I noticed, four eyes."

"Ishida, please stop! Maybe if we explain-"

"I told you, Orihime. She's not going to listen."

"I would have listened... though now that you burned my sleeve, I'm not even going to consider it."

"Ishida!"

"So, come on, Ishida," I spat, "Show me what you've got! I'm interested in that power you have."

He drew back his arm and another arrow shot from the bow, whizzing past my cheek. I drew Syugoryuu and whacked at another arrow that was aimed for my face.

"Please, miss, you have to understand! We don't want to fight!"

"Shut up! It's my duty to handle any intruders in the Seireitei! So tell me, boy, what's your full name and what exactly are you? I've never seen a human able to shoot arrows made of reishi before," I relaxed a little. As much as I wanted to fight him for real, I knew the best thing I could do first was to gain some information.

"Uryu Ishida. I'm a Quincy. So, now that I've told you who I am, why don't you tell me your name, shinigami. Isn't that custom for you during battle?"

"The name's Nazeka Mamori, lieutenant of the 13th Squad. I've never heard of a Quincy before... but I have another question for you. Why did you invade the Soul Society? You two are humans. Though you say you're a Quincy, you don't seem to have a high reiatsu or any real soul form. In other words, you're just a human with some spiritual powers. And as for you, girl, you have no real reiatsu at all. If anything, it's so tiny that I could easily crush you with my own. If you met a captain, they would kill you just from being around you. From what I can tell, you have no special power. What makes you two think you could take on the Soul Society? So tell me why... why the hell did you guys come here! Did you really think you could defeat all of us!" I lowered my sword a bit, but the boy didn't move his bow an inch.

"We came here to aid a friend. He's here to rescue a friend of his. A shinigami that you are condemning to die! You shinigami are disgusting! Condemning your own kind?" The Quincy grimaced, pulling his bow taut again. I froze.

"You're... you're here to rescue Rukia? That means... that means you're here with..."

"Ichigo Kurosaki. That's right."

"But... Kuchiki-taicho said he had killed him... that he was dead! Does that mean Renji was right? Kuchiki-taicho really did fail to kill him? But why...?"

Suddenly, there was a burst of reiatsu, and I could instantly tell that it was Renji's. There was another reiatsu rising with it, a completely different reiatsu than any I had ever felt. It had determination, guilt, sadness, and anger mixed within it. There was just something different about it, and I had no idea whose it was.

"That reiatsu... it's... Renji Abarai."

I narrowed my eyes, "You know Renji?"

"He nearly killed me down in the World of the Living. Of course I know who he is."

"Who's the other guy then?"

"That's Ichigo. He's fighting Renji... again."

"Ichigo!" I looked over in the direction of the Sokyoku Hill, where the reiatsu was spouting from, "He's fighting Renji! There's no way he'll win! Renji's a lieutenant!"

"Ichigo will win." The girl spoke up quietly. She smiled at me, "I know he will. After all, he's Ichigo. He always does his best, even when it doesn't look like he has a chance."

"You sound so confident. Are you sure this Ichigo will defeat Renji?"

"Most definitely."

I smirked, "Well, we'll see. We lieutenants are tough." I tugged on my badge, "Anyway, I want to ask you guys another question."

"What?" The girl asked. I sheathed my sword, "Would you guys accept my help?"

"What!" They both shouted, appalled at my sudden form of truce. I nodded, "I don't want Rukia to die either. In fact, I think her older brother, Kuchiki-taicho, is a total bastard for not trying to get her out of the execution. She's part of my squad, and she's an old friend of mine. She's counting on me and Ukitake-taicho to help get her out of this. The problem is, we tried a diplomatic solution, but we just can't get any solid evidence that giving Ichigo her powers was the only thing she could've done. So, if we can't do it with facts, then maybe... maybe I'll help you guys out in the end."

"But you raised your sword at us! There's no way we can trust you!"

"The only reason I did that was because... well... you're the ryouka. Natural reflexes. I was ready to fight you too because of what you did to my sleeve... how am I gonna explain to the captain this without admitting that I let you guys go?"

"You're just going to let us leave?"

"Of course. I just said I wanted to help you guys. However, I can't help you guys immediately. It'll be from behind the scenes, okay? Anyway, I have to go back to my captain. He isn't feeling well. Remember, we never met, okay?"

"Uh... sure?"

"Bye Ishida, and uh..."

"Orihime Inoue. But wait! We need to know where Rukia is-"

"Thanks! Bye Ishida and Inoue!" I dashed down the road I had been traveling down earlier, feeling the reiatsu from over by Sokyoku hill fluctuate up and down. My mind raced as I tried to figure out what I was going to tell Ukitake-taicho. I could always tell him that I cut it by accidentally running into something sharp... no, that won't work. My skin is burned... Wait! I could just cover it up with my lieutenant badge! I moved the badge down a little, making sure that the white fabric was tight enough that it wouldn't fall off.

I passed more and more barracks until I finally reached my own. The sun was getting lower and lower in the sky as I maneuvered through the endless roads. I had forgotten how far away the first squad's barracks were. I passed Kotetsu and Kotsubaki as they were walking my way. They waved hello, but they didn't stop to talk. In their hands were some bottles of sake, so I assumed they were going off to drink.

I crossed the threshold of the gate and wandered around the hallways until I reached the office. Ukitake-taicho still wasn't feeling well, so I was alone in the large room. I crashed onto the couch and took off my sandals, throwing them carelessly on the table in front of me. I found the pillow and laid back on the soft cushions, putting my feet up on the arm of the futon.

"Man, so much has gone on today. It's been the longest day ever!" I murmured to myself. I put my arms behind my head, "And now... now I've just said that I'll help the ryouka. Me and my impulsive behavior. How the hell am I supposed to help them! I'm a shinigami, dammit! I'm supposed to fight the ryouka, not help them! And if anyone else finds out... I'll be put in jail or punished for treachery too! What did I get myself into!" Damn it, damn it, damn it!

"And now every lieutenant is wanting to know what my relationship is with Toushirou. How annoying. I always hated gossip, even while in high school. But... I suppose that's a good question... I mean... No! What am I saying! Just because I'm not in front of somebody, it doesn't change what I said before to Rangiku. We're just friends. That's all. I mean, sure we've kissed but... but they were like, 'thank you' kisses. Both times. But... they were nice... AGH! What the hell am I thinking!" I smacked myself in the forehead, "I'm not in love with him! I'm not in love with him! I'm not in love him!"

I sat up and looked around, not sure what I wanted to do. But in my mind, I had to do something, something to keep me preoccupied. I jumped up and walked over to my desk, looking for some paperwork or something. For the first time, there was absolutely no paperwork left for me to do. I opened a drawer, looking for something else, but there wasn't anything for me to do in there either.

"This is driving me nuts! Isn't there something I can do! Something to get my mind off this?"

"You could always work on your bankai. Why not give that a shot?"

"Why the hell would I want to do that!"

"I'm giving you a suggestion. That will certainly keep you busy."

"Fine, whatever. I'll go to the training grounds," I muttered irritably.

"Excellent. Off we go, my little Nazeka!"

I picked up my sandals, quickly brushing off the dust and dirt that had covered a small part of the table because of them, and put them on, trudging outside to the training field away from the main section of the barracks. The field was void of any life, so there would be no disturbances. I walked to the center of the field and drew my zanpakutou, watching as Syugoryuu appeared in front of me-a transparent dragon that was probably three times my height.

"So, what now? What am I supposed to do?"

"Usually you would have your captain or someone else who knows how to do this with you, but since your captain is sick, then I'll take over for him. Basically, we're going to fight. As soon as you ready yourself, I'll release my full power. Around you will be different versions of your sword in it's shikai. You're going to have to find your true sword by believing in my power and believing in your own. You can't back out, and you can't back down. You will lose if you do."

"And what happens when I lose?"

"You'll lose the chance to ever gain a bankai. This is your one and only chance, so I suggest you make sure you're prepared."

"Doesn't this process usually take days? If you haven't noticed, the Seireitei's in a form of crisis, so I don't have time to fight you for hours on end."

"Yes, it usually takes months. However... we could do this differently. We could make it a little more interesting, how's that? If you can defeat me within the time limit of four hours, then I'll materialize like the next step promises, even though it's supposed to take days. This process is to make your zanpakutou obedient and work for you. It's also supposed to change your soul enough to allow extreme increases in energy that a bankai is required to have. If you can do it in four hours, then I promise you that your soul should have changed enough."

"Alright, four hours. How come you're so laid back about this?"

"You're forgetting that I've done this four times before you. I'm used to it."

"Sounds fair enough," I sheathed my zanpakutou and folded my arms across my chest, "I have one more question. How am I supposed to fight you? You're a dragon, you don't have any hands to hold a sword."

"Both Hyourinmaru and I have a solution for that."

He raised his head and started to glow, growing smaller and smaller until he was only a few feet taller than me. His body glowed even brighter, and when the light disappeared, there was no longer a dragon standing in front of me, but a young man with long steel gray hair... the same young man that helped me with my shikai all those years ago!

"Y-You're the one that helped me-"

"I couldn't have you using me wrong. You did need some instruction, so what better way to help than actually guide you through holding it and using the right wrist movements?" He slowly became more solid until it was like he was a person that lived in the Soul Society and not a dragon that lived in my soul.

"Why didn't you tell me that that was you?"

"I thought you assumed it was."

"It had passed through my mind, but I was still hesitant about believing that it was you, since you hadn't mentioned it."

"You shouldn't be so disbelieving of my powers. Alright then, enough questions. Let the fun begin!" Syugoryuu held out his hand and my zanpakutou disappeared from it's hilt, dispersing around the training room in different forms of my shikai. The problem was, that even though it seemed it would be easy for me to spot the right sword, they all only had minor changes, so I would have to be really careful.

I turned to Syugoryuu to ask him how many swords there were out here, but the words never left my mouth. The only thing that did leave was a huge burst of air when Syugoryuu punched me hard in the gut. He held out his hand and a bright light formed the shape of my shikai in his palm. It formed into the familiar whip and I looked at it closely. If that's my shikai, then shouldn't the one I'm looking for be exactly the same?

"Not necessarily!"

I looked up to see him dragging the whip around his body, letting it snap forward with it's sharp crescent blades. I dodged, backing up just a few steps before he flicked it again.

Forget trying to look for them, 'cause it seems that Syugoryuu has the intention of killing me more than helping me!


	13. The Trouble with Guys

"Tch, is that... is that all you've got... Syugoryuu!" I screamed, picking myself up off the ground using the hilt of the now chipped zanpakutou in my hands. Blood trickled down my face and into my eyes; it stung, but only a little compared to the pain of my side, which I clutched desperately to keep the blood from flowing.

"You just love to push it..." Syugoryuu said, picking up one of the stray zanpakutou on the ground and tossing it to me, "Get up."

I did as commanded and picked up the other sword, dumping the broken one onto the pile with the rest of the worthless fakes. My opponent raised his own sword, but unlike me, he wasn't at all tired. It had been nearly three hours now and it was already nightfall; we'd been at it, back and forth, but the only one that showed signs of battle was me. I was covered in cuts and wounds and bruises. Syugoryuu had none.

"You only have an hour left. I suggest you get a move on and figure out which sword is the real one."

"I don't need you to remind me."

"Would you like a hint?"

"Stop mocking me!"

He smirked, "Alright, alright, relax," his tongue wiped up the blood on his blade, "this won't take too much longer."

He charged, a smile stretched across his face as he aimed for my chest. I slid to my right, twisting enough to slam my katana down on his zanpakutou. But it cracked in half, leaving me without a weapon almost immediately. Syugoryuu smirked, twisting the broken half out of my hands and slicing down my arm. I grimaced, grabbing my arm and jumping back out of his reach. There was another katana nearby, so I lunged for it, desperate for another weapon.

Syugoryuu was laughing, almost hysterically as he chased after me. He had once explained to me how much he loved fighting, how his blood boiled whenever he held a sword. I had never expected him to love it so much as this; he didn't care whether I lived or died.

As soon as I grabbed the hilt, he pierced my left hand, snickering when I cried out in pain. I yanked my hand away, snatching up the hilt with my right. But Syugoryuu was fast; he snapped his wrist down and immediately cords shot from the hilt and wrapped around my wrist and the blade. He pulled back, splintering the newfound katana as well as leaving thousands of tiny cuts bleeding all over my hand and lower forearm.

"Gah!" I screamed, feeling the sharp sting and watching as my sword fell into pieces in my hand.

"Ha! Did you really think you could beat me? Want to know a little secret? Only two of your predecessors ever conquered my bankai! They were both much more experienced as lieutenants and older than you! Not to mention they were actual souls born here in the Soul Society! Not some sniveling fifteen year old girl from the World of the Living!"

"Shut up!" I shrieked, "You're the one who chose me! Like hell I wanted this! You think this is fun? I never wanted to be a shinigami! I never wanted to die! But is that my fault? No! I keep getting this stuff pushed on me; I have no choice! So shut up, Syugoryuu! You chose me to be your new wielder, so you're gonna have to put up with me no matter what! You can go ahead and destroy my soul! See if I care!"

"You're not listening!" He taunted. I stared at him like he was crazy, "Excuse me?"

"You're. Not. Listening. You're not paying any attention to what you're supposed to be doing. That's why you're failing! Have you ever thought of _listening _for your true zanpakutou? Seeing if you could hear it call out to you? NO! You've never once stopped and listened! Ever wondered why each fake zanpakutou keeps breaking on you? It's because you're failing miserably! Listen for it, dang it! Listen!"

He lunged again, the cords whipping around to catch their victim. I dodged, flash-stepping backward to give myself a greater distance from him, yet have a close enough proximity to another katana. I grimaced, "Well how the heck can I stop and listen with you attacking me every other second!" I looked around for him, but he had disappeared.

"Find your balance! You have to be able to be present within your inner world at the same time as fighting your opponent!"

His voice came from behind; so I spun around, but I didn't have a weapon to block him. Instead, I jumped backward again, but neared another katana.

"Balance?"

"Balance!"

I grabbed the katana and lashed out, stabbing him in his shoulder; but as soon as the metal pierced his skin, my mind grew dark, and I was lost in his cry. I opened my eyes to see the tower of my inner world again. It was quiet, and Syugoryuu was nowhere to be seen. This was my chance; I could now listen for my real zanpakutou.

There. I could hear it. It was faint, but audible. It was up at the top of the tower. Great. I rolled my eyes and sprinted for the stairs, wondering what the heck was going on in the outside world. I grew anxious, not quite sure what to find at the top. Surely it wasn't going to be easy.

What I did find was something I had not expected. Syugoryuu was perched in the middle of the tower, my sword in its sheath clamped in his mouth. He was wagging his tail, as if happy to see me despite all he was doing to me in the outside world.

"Syugoryuu?"

He tossed me the sword and sheath and barked, smiling. I chuckled, "I swear you are part dog. So, are you actually in a good mood?"

He barked again and I scratched his nose before shaking my head, "What am I doing? You're not my pet and you can talk. Use English!" I looked at my zanpakutou, "So, do I draw my sword and cry bankai? Or do I have to do something else that you're not telling me?"

Syugoryuu nodded, so I did as I was instructed, tossing aside the sheath and taking a deep breath. I focused and shouted, "BANKAI!"

In an instant, my spiritual pressure skyrocketed. I knew which sword was the real one. Syugoryuu roared and ran at me, disappearing when he should have hit me. My eyesight wavered and blackened, and I heard one last roar before I found myself holding a fake sword against Syugoryuu's. I was back.

I grabbed ahold of his hilt and kicked him in the chest, wrenching the sword away from him and tossing my own away. I held his zanpakutou with both hands and cried, "Bankai! Abaremawaru* Syugoryuu!"

My spiritual pressure did the same thing it had when I was in my inner world. Syugoryuu's face was frozen in surprise as he faded away. My eyesight blackened. My fingernails grew to claws and my hair lengthened until it twisted into a single long strand that looked like Syugoryuu's tail.

This... this was my bankai? A simple transformation? But what good did it do? Make me faster? Make me stronger? What?

"_It won't be long before you start to feel your blood boil. You basically gain some of my traits with your state of bankai, including the bloodlust... do you remember how I told you that there would be both good and bad to wielding me? When you released me from my sleeping kido? Well, this is what I mean. The longer you stay in this form, the more you lose yourself. You begin to lose a state of consciousness and go on a rampage. The good side is that you gain immeasurable strength and stamina. You can change your zanpakutou in and out of its shikai constantly. You'll be able to withstand pain longer and become a killing machine... with the cost of your sanity."_

"Why didn't you tell me this earlier? Now I don't want my bankai."

"_It came with me, kid."_

"Kid!"

"_You heard me. Now, just calm your spiritual pressure and your bankai will disappear. Take a deep breath and relax."_

I did so, and my physical appearance changed back to normal. I had done it. I had achieved my bankai. I wasn't exactly excited though. If anyone found out and told Ukitake-or even worse, Yamamoto-then I was going to be forced into a captain position even faster.

"_By the way, did you even realize that I didn't have to materialize and you released your bankai in one go? Impressive. Now if only you could tell someo-"_

"No."

"_Oh come on! At least tell Toushirou! Or Ukitake! If you keep it a secret that means you can't use it as much and that means I don't get used very often at all! Besides, you barely even use your shikai because you're better at hand to hand combat. Don't I get a little bit more use now?"_

"Toushirou?"

"_Oh jeez, don't change the subject."_

"Oh yeah... he's still mad at me, isn't he...?"

"_Well, duh. But back to the whole bankai thing. Listen, I would really appreciate-"_

"I'd better go talk to him."

"_Uh, do you realize how beat up you are right now?"_

"I don't care at this point."

"_Well you'll have to explain to him what happened. So, will you tell him about your bankai?"_

"If I do, will you shut up?"

"_Deal."_

"Alright then," I sheathed my sword and checked my wounds, making sure they weren't bad enough that I would have to see one of the fourth squad members. Nix that... I was covered in blood and my forehead was still bleeding, same with my side. I decided that they weren't that bad, so I first went to my room to use some of my own bandages and cleaned my head wound.

Once I was somewhat decent, at least for out in public, I left the barracks and walked down the road only a short while before I was halted by a messenger. He was one of the wartime messengers and had a similar message.

"Mamori-fukutaicho, these are special wartime orders given specifically to lieutenants and captains by Yamamoto-soutaicho. All seated shinigami, lieutenants, and captains are given full permission to carry their zanpakutou in the city. The full release ban has been lifted, therefore your full power may be used if necessary or by choice. Also, it was to be informed that Renji Abarai-fukutaicho has been defeated by the ryouka. Seeing as a lieutenant such as yourself has been defeated by a mere ryouka, I suggest that you watch yourself Mamori-fukutaicho. We don't know who's next. Please be careful."

"Thank you. I will. You are dismissed."

He nodded and disappeared using shunpo. I stared at the dirt road and sighed, "Well, Renji... looks like that Kurosaki kid won. Those ryouka were right after all... Hope you didn't get beat up too bad." I shook my head, "What am I getting down for. I gotta go apologize to Toushirou and I really don't want to already be in a bad mood when I do."

I reorganized myself mentally and continued on the road again for the barracks. It wasn't long before I reached them; however, when I arrived and asked Matsumoto for Toushirou's whereabouts, she replied that she had no idea. She did say that I was allowed to stay in his office until he returned since I was a lieutenant and-much to my horror-his 'lover'. I was surprised that she didn't ask about my minor cuts and bruises, but that was Matsumoto for you. Always had her head in the clouds unless it was really urgent.

So I waited. And waited. And waited some more until I finally decided to take a nap on one of the couches in hope that it would pass the time. Besides, I was cut up and tired, so a nap sounded great. It was short-lived nevertheless, since I got a sharp smack to the head when he finally came back.

"Why are you sleeping on my couch? Can't you be lazy in your own barracks?" He asked irritably while he sat down at his desk.

"Why do you have to be so moody? Can't you figure out a nicer way to wake someone up?" I snapped back. And my good mood just flew out the window...

"Oh, I'm moody? Give me a break. You might as well admit you have split personalities. Either that or you're bipolar. Take your pick."

"Well at least I'm not the size of a five year old!"

"No, but your IQ might as well be!"

"White-haired freak!"

"Selfish waste of life!"

We stared each other down, both furious. It was silent. Dead silent. But one of us had to give eventually, so I looked away and crossed my arms. I ducked my head slightly and muttered, "I didn't come here to argue with you."

"Then why the hell did you come?"

"I came to... I... I came to..." my voice got real low, "...I came to apologize."

"What?"

"I came to apologize okay? I wanted to say I was sorry."

"So the best way to do that was to start another fight?"

"No... you started it. Besides, you should know that when someone gets testy with me I snap back. It's your own fault since you just started out with a bad mood. I came here with a good mood ready to apologize but since you weren't here and I waited for quite a while, I took a nap. Jeez."

"So you expect me to forgive you. Just like that. After you lied to me for several years?"

"I... yeah... kind of. What else am I supposed to do? I'm not happy. You're not happy. You're never happy! So I came here to apologize in the hopes of making us both happy in the end! Is that so wrong?" I paused as I remembered something I had been taught when I was little, "That's love. Wanting what's best for the other person. That right there is what love is. Wanting the other to be happy. And I want you to be happy. So I guess you could say that... I love you..." I watched as he raised an eyebrow, but then I quickly dug my face in my hands, "I'm really bad and awkward at this... uh, okay... It's kind of hard to want you to be happy when we're both mad at each other. Therefore I want to apologize."

I looked up nervously, my face a deep red. He walking toward me, and he stopped by the table in front of me, arms folded. He sighed, looked up at the ceiling and then back down at me.

"I forgive you."

"Do you really mean it?"

His expression softened, "Yes. I forgive you. And I want what's best for you too. Don't ever think that I don't. I haven't been mad at you all this time. I just wanted to hear you say sorry," he gave me a quick peck on the cheek, "But we'll discuss this later. I have a more important matter that involves you."

*Rampaging/to rampage


	14. No Time for Jokes

"I'm worried about the safety of the fifth division. I know it seems stupid, but I can't help but feel that the third squad is up to something. I mean... I overheard Ichimaru talking to Aizen at the captain meeting. Listen, keep an eye out for Ichimaru. I have no idea what he might be planning."

I continued to stare at him blankly, "And this has to do with me how...?"

"You were in the same class as Kira. Maybe you could get some information out of him."

"Look, this has nothing to do with me, so why should I interrogate my former frie-actually... he was never my friend. We were just classmates. So why should he even want to talk to me or give me information?"

"You're both lieutenants."

"That means nothing. Just because I'm a lieutenant doesn't mean that I can easily get along with any other lieutenant... I couldn't-and wouldn't dare-approach Oomaeda and try to start a conversation."

"Won't you just try to talk to him?"

I banged my fist on the table, "Damn it, Toushirou! When I say I won't do it, I won't do it! If you're so intent on getting information out of him, then you do it. You're a captain after all, so he'll probably listen to you more than he would me. I don't even see why you're so persistent on this! It's just the fifth squad!" I paused and immediately knew the answer, "Oh... Hinamori's in the fifth squad. It's not Aizen you're worried about, it's Hinamori. Look I'm sure whatever grudge Ichimaru has on the fifth squad doesn't have anything to do with Hinamori and it will only affect Aizen."

"Who said it was about Hinamori!"

"I just did! Got a problem with me knowing what you're really thinking? That was almost too easy to read. Since when have you been an open book?"

"I am not an open book."

"Man, what is it with guys and arguing about every little thing?"

"I'm arguing because you're arguing! You're just as stubborn as I am!"

"I am _not_ stubborn!"

He snickered, "Oh give me a break. You're such a hypocrite."

"Calling me a hypocrite makes you a hypocrite."

"Don't even start."

I opened my mouth to snap back at him; but, instead of saying what I wanted to, someone else's voice and words come out of my mouth, "Would you two just shut up and get along! What is the matter with you guys! You've never had issues like this!"

Toushirou looked at me blankly for a second then retorted, "Syugoryuu, stay out of this."

"Like hell I will! Obviously you guys still aren't on good terms, so what's the problem!"

"She is! Acting the way she is! She's driving me insane!"

"You guys are driving each other insane and you're driving me insane, so leave it be!"

"Syugoryuu, get the hell outta my life!" I regained control and shoved Syugoryuu into his tower mentally. I took a deep breath and smoothed back my hair. "As much as I don't want to admit it, Syugoryuu's right. We just need to calm down, that's all. We're both on edge, but so is the whole damn Soul Society. There are captain meetings left and right and-shoot! I forgot to tell Ukitake-taicho about that last meeting! I got to go, Toushirou. I'll see ya later, okay?"

"Before you go, mind telling me where you got all those cuts?"

"Uh..." I started.

"Did you fight a ryouka?"

"No. Well, yes, but... they're not here to harm the Soul Society in general-"

"Nazeka! You let them go!"

"Um... if I told you yes, what would you do?"

"Nazeka, thousands of our own kind are injured because of them! You could at least have taken them into custody and-"

"All they wanna do is save Rukia! That's it! And I agree with them. Rukia's part of my squad. Both Ukitake and I want to do whatever we can to set her free."

"Uttering treason like that will get you put in jail like her!"

"You're a captain, if you honestly wanted to, you would."

"That's not the point. The point is that there are people who would rather protect Soul Society than their own kind and their not afraid to kill or imprison those that could harm it!"

"I told them I would help them."

"The ryouka?" He groaned, "Nazeka, you're asking for a death wish."

"Of course. We both have the same goal, so why not help them with theirs since they're doing a much better job!"

"Yeah, a better job of destroying the Seireitei and sending everything into chaos! We're on official wartime orders, Nazeka. We can't make peace until Yamamoto-soutaicho agrees, you know that!"

"I don't care! That old bastard can go rot in Hell for all I care."

"So, where did you get those wounds? I know that the ryouka aren't the real reason."

"Bankai training."

"Bankai? You're training for bankai at a time like this! What, are you stupid? That takes years and we don't have that kind of free time!"

"I already mastered it for your information. Jeez, would you let me finish? Syugoryuu's bankai is a little different... at least training for it is. He gives you four hours just to find the right zanpakutou. Once you do that, he promises to do the rest. He said since he's done it three times before me, it's absolutely no big deal."

"Ukitake-taicho helped you with this? I'm sure he wouldn't agree to do that at this time."

"Uh, actually, Syugoryuu was both acting as my mentor and my zanpakutou."

"Your zanpakutou taught you under four hours?" He asked skeptically, raising an eyebrow. I nodded, "What, don't believe me?"

"No, I've just never heard of that happening before."

"Well then, you're looking at the first person to master their bankai in four hours with only the help of her zanpakutou."

"You do realize you're liable for becoming captain now, right?"

"No one else has to know. Just you and me. It'll be our secret."

"You can't go dragging me into this."

"I just did."

"Someone will find out eventually. You'll use it, and then someone will see. You'd be reassigned to captain immediately you know. That was the only reason Soutaicho made you become a shinigami."

"That's why it's a secret. Anyway, like I said before, I got to get going. Ukitake-taicho still doesn't know what happened at the meeting-"

"I know..."

"See you later," I said, waving slightly before jumping out the window, hearing Toushirou complaining behind me, "Not out the window! Nazeka! Argh, you're impossible!"

"Bye!" I shouted as I tore down the streets of the Seireitei. It was already dark, no one else was on the streets; but, it didn't take long to get to barracks whether during the daytime or night. I knocked on Ukitake's doors and opened them without waiting for an answer. He was sitting up in bed sipping a cup of tea. He smiled when he saw me and beckoned for me to come in. I shut the doors behind me and kneeled by his bedside, "Ukitake-taicho, I'm sorry I didn't come and tell you sooner. The news is very important."

"It's fine."

"Thank you. Special wartime orders have been given. We are permitted to wear our zanpakutou through the main city as well as use them and release them. Captains and Lieutenants are allowed to fight without any restrictions at all."

"No restrictions? Yamamoto-soutaicho must be tired of these ryouka."

"Agreed. Also, Ichimaru Gin-taicho's punishment for his reckless actions has been dropped due to the state of war."

"I see... Thank you, Nazeka."

"You're welcome, taicho. Are you feeling better?"

"Much. I should be able to return to normal duties tomorrow."

"That's good to hear. I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Nazeka, why are you covered in blood? You ought to go and see a member of the fourth squad."

"It's fine. I wouldn't want to bother them with some minor injuries when so many of us are already in their barracks."

"Are you sure? The one in your side looks pretty bad. How did you get those, anyway?"

"Uh, I ran into a ryouka... but they ran off. It's fine. They'll heal up in no time. Anyway, I think there's some more paperwork to do, so I'll go and do that. I hope to see you up and about tomorrow morning, Ukitake-taicho."

I opened the door, but he called me back, "Nazeka, don't go yet. Sit down."

"Yes, sir." I slid the door closed again and did as was told. He frowned and I could tell that he knew I was lying.

"Give me your zanpakutou."

"Yes, sir." I released it from my belt and held it out, still sheathed. He took it, pulled it slightly out of it's sheath before sliding it back in and setting it on his lap.

"Nazeka..."

"Yes, sir?"

"Did you really think you could hide it from me when your spiritual pressure is fluctuating constantly? It's obvious, even to a lieutenant, that your spiritual pressure has changed and increased. So, tell me, who taught you?"

"Who taught me what?"

"Your bankai. I know you achieved it... but... how long have you been working on it? It takes ten years to achieve bankai. Who was training you?"

"Syugoryuu taught me himself. It was his idea. He gave me four hours and-"

He looked at me skeptically, "Your zanpakutou taught you how to use it's bankai and he did it under four hours?"

"Toushirou gave me that same look when I told him..." I sighed. His expression changed again; this time, he looked sad, "You told Toushirou-kun?"

"Well, he kind of forced it out of me but... yes..." I confessed.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well... I didn't plan on telling anyone... it just sort of slipped out when I saw him earlier today and... well, now you know."

"Nazeka, why didn't you want anyone else to know?"

"Because... if word gets out that I know my bankai, then I'll be moved to captain even faster and I don't want to be a captain and... I just thought it would be safer... And if I become captain then... then I'll have to leave this squad and... a-and I don't want to leave!" I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I tried so hard to keep them down, but they ended up down my cheeks anyway, "I love this squad like it's my family... it's the only family I've ever had, taicho, and I don't want to be separated from it now! All I wanted was to control Syugoryuu; I didn't want the power or the rank of captain. I was afraid to leave."

I wiped away the tears from my eyes with the back of my hand while Ukitake-taicho placed his hand on my shoulder and sighed. "Nazeka, I'm not mad at you. I just want you to understand that if you ever need any help or anything like this comes up, you're always welcome to come tell me. I want to be the first person you want to talk to when something happens. After all this time, you still haven't learned that? Besides, if you really consider this squad to be your family, then you wouldn't have a problem telling me. I won't tell Yamamoto-soutaicho until you're ready to become captain, understood?"

"Thank you, taicho," I whispered gratefully. He took another sip of his tea and sighed, "Now, it's getting late. Why don't you go to bed? It's been a long and arduous day."

"Yes, sir," I bowed and stood, opening the doors to leave again. When I stepped through and turned around to slide the double doors closed, Ukitake-taicho asked one more question, "Oh, by the way, are you happy with your bankai? What is it, exactly?"

I smiled crookedly, "Good night, Ukitake-taicho."

He pouted a bit, "Ah, Nazeka!", but I shut the door and walked back to the main building.

"_This isn't what you were expecting, now was it, Nazeka?'_

_What do you mean?_

"_Now both Toushirou and Ukitake know. Others are bound to find out as well you know, and then Soutaicho will know."_

_They won't tell._

"_Sure."_

_Don't you trust them?_

"_Do you?"_

_I trust them with my life. Now, I'm done talking about this. Good night._

"_Don't you ignore me! Hey, Nazeka! Nazeka! Damn it!"_

The next day, I was called to a lieutenants' meeting, though I didn't want to go. My injuries were sore from the previous day and I was dead tired. But unfortunately, we couldn't afford not having all of our lieutenants during the time of war. So, I just had to suck it up and get going.

Tetsuzaemon-san was the only other lieutenant in the room when I arrived; however, my barracks weren't far. It wasn't long before Hisagi-san, Rangiku, and Kira showed up.

"Ah, hey Nazeka, what happened with you and taicho last night?" Rangiku asked, "I never saw you leave."

Immediately, the three guys stared at me. My face turned blood red and I stuttered, "D-Don't be silly, Rangiku, I left last night. Don't go insinuating things like you know they're true."

"Did you apologize?"

"What makes you think I had to apologize to him!"

"Because taicho said-"

Suddenly, a piercing shriek came from outside. I grabbed hold of my hilt and stood up.

"What was that scream?" Rangiku asked.

"It came from the Eastern Wall!"

Kira whispered almost inaudibly, "That was Hinamori's voice..." Before the rest of us had time to process that, he was already out the door. I chased after him with the others behind me. Outside, around the corner and halfway across the bridge, was Hinamori.

"Hinamori-kun! Hinamori-kun! What's wrong? Hinamori-kun!" Kira asked, stepping in front of her and shaking her to get her attention. I had stopped just at the beginning of the bridge behind the others, but I could clearly see what had shaken her up so badly.

High up at the top of the building across from me was a corpse, pinned to the side with a sword. No, it wasn't just any corpse... it was...

"AIZEN-TAICHO!" Hinamori screamed, falling to her knees. I couldn't imagine how hard it was for her to see her captain like that. She had admired him so much... he was everything to her. And now he was dead, with his blood dripping down the side of the building and his sword stabbed through his chest.

I think the most unnerving part was the fact that he didn't look frightened, angry, or shocked. Instead, his expression was that of someone who was calm. It didn't make sense. He had been assassinated, there was no way he would be calm. And people die with their feelings... I knew that all too well.

While I had been pondering this terrible phenomenon, I had been completely unaware of Ichimaru-taicho's appearance. "What's all this racket, so early in the morning? Oh...? This is a terrible situation, isn't it?"

No one made a sound. We all stared at Ichimaru-taicho like he was someone we had never seen before. But then, Hinamori grabbed the hilt of her sword and yelled, "So, it was you!"

She charged at the captain, though I didn't quite understand her reasoning as to why. Kira stepped in front of her and blocked it. Sparks flew when the steel of their blades smashed together.

"Kira-kun... why...?" Hinamori asked, her voice shaking. Kira looked at her indifferently, "I'm the lieutenant of Squad 3. No matter what the reason, I cannot allow anyone to raise a sword against the captain."

Neither of them backed down, but when Ichimaru-taicho turned to leave, Hinamori tried to go after him. Kira didn't allow it, but kept her back.

"Please... get out of my way... Kira-kun!"

"I cannot."

"Move! Get out of my way!" She shrieked desperately, but Kira refused again, "No!"

"Can't you hear me? I said to move!"

"Can't you hear me say 'no'!"

Ichimaru-taicho passed me, and suddenly the reiatsu spiked in the air. Hinamori raised her sword above her head and shouted, "Hajike... Tobiume!" A pink light erupted from the changed zanpakutou and there was a huge explosion, the thick cloud of smoke blocking my view. But it disappeared from the outward force of the eruption and Kira slid back on all fours away from the huge hole in the wooden floor.

"Releasing your zanpakutou in a place like this... How thoughtless!" He rebuked, "Do you realize what you're doing! Do not confuse public manners with private, Hinamori-fukutaicho!"

She ignored him and raised her sword again, the pink light forming a ball of fire and flying from the blade, crashed into the building above both Ichimaru-taicho and me.

"I see... Then I have no choice. I shall dispose of you as an enemy," Kira growled. He vaulted into the air, "Omote o agero*, Wabisuke!" He came down fast in the air, but suddenly the reiatsu skyrocketed for just a moment. Toushirou stepped between them, sliding his own zanpakutou out just a bit and blocking Wabisuke while stepping on Hinamori's Tobiume. Her sword was jammed into the wooden slats of the bridge.

"Don't either of you move," he said, not looking at either of them.

"Hitsugaya..."

"Arrest the two of them!"

Rangiku and Tetsuzaemon-san grabbed Hinamori while Hisagi-san grabbed Kira.

"Hitsugaya-kun!" Hinamori cried, but Toushirou scolded her immediately, "Hinamori! Is this any time to be clashing swords with each other? Shouldn't your first priority be to lower Aizen-taicho down from there? I will make the report to Soutaicho. Put those two under detention. Take them away. Mamori, take both of their swords."

Startled that I was called to order, I hesitated, "Y-Yes, sir." As I confiscated both Hinamori and Kira's zanpakutou, Toushirou whispered, "I want to see you in my office later, understood?"

"Any particular reason why?" I didn't whisper back; I had regained my confidence.

"This is an order, Mamori."

"Ooh, somebody's abusing their abilities on their friend."

"I'm merely enforcing my powers as a captain, which you seem to be forgetting Mamori."

I did a fake salute and backed away mockingly, "Oh, yes sir! Would you like me to kiss your ass while I'm at it?"

"Mamori!" He said threateningly, his hands clenching into fists.

I ran off after the others, laughing.

"Mamori, I think that was a bad idea," Kira said, but I whacked the back of his head, "Shut up, Kira. Besides, you're under arrest, therefore you have no right to speak at this time until the captains conclude what happened and your punishment."

"Oi, Mamori, ease up, will ya?" Tetsuzaemon-san complained. I frowned, "Why? Just doing my job like the rest of us."

"You're never this serious. You in a bad mood or are you aimin' for suicide? 'Cause I don't think I've ever seen someone talk to a captain like that."

"Relax, it's only Toushirou."

Hisagi-san, Tetsuzaemon-san, and Rangiku sighed. Then Rangiku muttered, "I think that's beside the point."

"Anyway," Tetsuzaemon-san continued, "I noticed you looked awful this morning, no offense. I didn't wanna ask, but why are you covered in bruises and wounds?"

"Look at you, delving into other's personal lives. That's not like you at all, Tetsuzaemon!"

"So we're all a little on edge right now. After everything that's happened, you never know..."

"You never know...? You never know what, Tetsuzaemon?"

"Well, I dunno..."

"I think he's trying to say that we can't help but be suspicious after everything that's happened. Not just you, but everyone else. And the fact that you came in with cuts that look like sword wounds..." Hisagi-san tried to explain, but I scoffed, "You've gotta be kidding me. Doubting your fellow lieutenants?"

"With Aizen-taicho dead, how the hell do you expect any of us not to doubt others! That's why Hinamori and Izuru got in that fight! And you seem way too calm about this, that's why-" Tetsuzaemon began shouting.

"You think I had something to do with this? Tch, unlike everyone else around here, it appears I'm the only one thinking logically about this! Did you see Aizen-taicho's expression? Doesn't it seem odd that his expression was calm?" I shouted back.

"C'mon, you really think that it seemed odd? People die and their expressions fade."

"They do not!"

"And how the hell would you know, Mamori!"

"Because when I died my body still had my terrified expression plastered to my face!"

"You still remembered that?" He sneered. I growled, "Damn right! It's the only thing I remember now and I can't get it outta my head when I see death! Just shut the hell up, Tetsuzaemon! You don't know a thing about dying! You're just another one of those souls that were born here! You're all so ignorant of this concept!" I shoved both the zanpakutou in my hands into his arms, "Here, take the damn things. Toushirou wanted to see me in his office anyway."

I flash-stepped away, jumping from roof to roof until I reached the stairs. When I reached the bottom, I flash-stepped between streets until I reached the tenth squads barracks.

"_Hey, Nazeka, I know a way to cheer you up!"_

_What Syugoryuu, what could possibly make me happy right now? _I thought irritably.

"_Why was six afraid of seven?"_

I sighed inwardly, _Oh no..._

"_Because seven eight nine!" _He began to laugh hysterically in my head.

_...Syugoryuu... that wasn't-_

"_Okay, what about this one: What do cats swim in?"_

_What, Syugoryuu?_ I rolled my eyes.

"_A kitty pool!"_

_Ba-dum, psh. Ooh, yay, you'll be here all night..._

"_Fine, I see, still upset? Will you ever laugh at my jokes?"_

_If you get new ones, maybe. Now, I'm not in the mood._

"_Fine, fine, I'll leave you alone. I did promise you at one time that you would have complete control of me after you mastered bankai."_

_Before I forget, do all zanpakutou constantly talk to their masters like this?_

"_No."_

_Then why do you?_

"_Because I get lonely... and because I like having company other than Hyourinmaru. You don't come visit very often."_

I ignored him after that, not really in the mood to sympathize. I passed through the gate, beginning to wonder why Toushirou had wanted to see me... _again_. At least I didn't have to deal with Rangiku since she was still with the others. I knocked on his office door and walked in, not even waiting for a reply.

"You wanted to see me?" I griped, shutting the door behind me. He wasn't in the office, so I sat down on the couch and groaned, "You call me in here and you aren't even here?"

Once again, I had to wait a while before he arrived, and I instantly reproached his habit of making me wait. He merely rolled his eyes and sat on the couch across from me.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" I asked innocently. He put his head in his hands before looking back up at me and sighing, "Argh, I'm just so stressed."

"That's what you called me in for? 'Cause you know, we all are."

"That's not why. Just give me a few seconds," he hung his head again and pressed his fingers to his temples. After a minute or two, he raised his head and sat up. "You better?" I asked.

"Yeah, for now."

"Captain responsibilities getting to you?"

"You actually care now after what you said to me back there?"

I turned red and looked down to the floor, "Okay, so I didn't mean that... I dunno... I get really rude when I'm stressed. I really didn't mean that, I promise."

"Your attitude _has_ become a bit of a problem."

"Don't rub it in. A lot has happened."

"You don't know the half of it. First Abarai and now Aizen..."

"R-Renji? What happened to Renji?"

"He's under arrest as well, didn't you know? Byakuya threw him in jail after he was defeated by one of the ryouka."

"What? That bastard... why the hell did he do that?"

"Abarai was being reckless. Without orders and before wartime orders were issued, Abarai went and faced the ryouka himself. It wasn't his first priority. It seems everyone's priorities are out of order. The whole Seireitei is falling apart..."

"Just with a few ryouka..."

"That are able to take down lieutenants and possibly captains..."

"Wait, what do you mean? Do you think that Aizen was killed by a ryouka?"

"It's always a possibility. I mean, that one ryouka that defeated Abarai... he's the same guy that Byakuya said he killed in the World of the Living. He obviously has some right to his anger... he was nearly killed by a member of the Gotei 13 and Kuchiki was imprisoned by us. He would have a grudge against us, wouldn't he?"

"I dunno... Ishida and Orihime seemed to have the idea that Ichigo just wanted to save Rukia. I don't think that he has any intention of purposely harming us. I don't think that Aizen-taicho was killed by a ryouka."

"You're one of the few that has talked to them... but you're the first we've heard of to actually agree to helping them. You do understand that you'll be locked up first chance that the higher ups get, right?"

"You _are_ a higher up, so why haven't you locked me up? I know I asked you earlier, but you never gave me a clear answer. You locked up Hinamori for treason, why not me?"

His face darkened, and I knew I had struck a nerve. "You didn't want to, I know that. But then why did you if you won't put me under arrest either?"

"Because you haven't technically raised a sword against another shinigami. Though you agree with them and say that you would help them, you haven't yet. Unless your actions fulfill your words, then I won't arrest you. The others won't be as reasonable though."

"Ukitake-taicho won't arrest me. Neither will Kyouraku-taicho. But, just for clarification, if I did raise my sword, you would arrest me?"

"Yes."

"Good to know."

"...What are you planning?"

"Oh, nothing..."

"Nazeka..." he began, his voice stern.

"Relax," I waved my hand, "I don't wanna get you involved. You'll take an even harder fall than I will."

"You make it sound like you've already decided what you're going to do. Think it over and remember the consequences. Anyway, I have a question."

"Shoot."

"You don't think I was... too hard on Hinamori this morning?"

"Doubting your own authoritative measures I see..."

"Well?"

"Oh, I dunno... I think she needs a little time. I think it'll be good for her, help her calm down."

"She's going to hate me..."

"She'll understand, I promise. There's no way that this whole issue will break apart your friendship. You two are like brother and sister. She'll forgive you."

"I want to look into this. Who would want to target Aizen? And if it is Ichimaru, then what would he gain? I don't get it..."

"He's always kind of scared me. Maybe he's just enjoying the show. The Seireitei's in chaos, Aizen's dead, ryouka are running all over the place, and Hinamori and Kira were ready to kill each other on that bridge this morning, right in front of him!"

"You really think he's behind it?"

"Well, it does seem to make sense."

"But what about the ryouka?"

"I dunno... they know I'm friendly. I could ask them."

"That's too much for me to ask you to do. It could risk your rank."

I raised an eyebrow skeptically. He rephrased his previous sentence, "I don't want you to get in trouble for something I could find out otherwise."

"But if it was my choice-"

"You don't need to be doing this! Damn it, we've lost Abarai, Aizen, Hinamori, and Kira! We don't need another ranked officer out! I don't want you under arrest either! This is becoming ridiculous! We're putting our fellow comrades in jail while we're on wartime duty! We can't afford this!" He slammed his fist on the table between us before putting his head in his hands again.

I sighed and got up, sitting next to him. I put my arm around him and said quietly, "I know it's stressful. We're all stressed right now. You're smart, you'll figure it out."

He spoke into his hands, so his words were muffled. The only thing I could make out was a moan.

"What?" I asked. He lifted his head, "I said that it doesn't make it any easier."

"I'm always here to help. Just tell me what to do."

"That's Matsumoto's job."

"I know, but think of what you could get done with two lieutenants!" I stood up in front of him, "The thirteenth squad is always ready to help!"

He chuckled, "But you have just about as much to do as I do. You're in charge when Ukitake's out, so you have to take care of both lieutenant matters as well as captain matters. You don't need to do anything on top of that."

"I'll have to face it in the future. I can't avoid becoming captain. This will help prepare me for that time. Besides, why wouldn't I help a friend out when he really needs it! I'm always here. All you have to do is ask."

He smiled slightly, "Thanks. I think we'll start with examining Aizen's room. Maybe there's something in there that will give us a clue to his assassin. Matsumoto can do that with a few others from my squad. You can ask Kira if he knows where his captain was last night."

"Again with Kira? Why do I get stuck talking to him?"

"If you're going to help, don't complain about the work I assign you!"

I held up my hands in defeat, "Okay, okay, I'll talk to him. I won't like it, but I'll do it."

"Thank you, Nazeka," he stood up and gave me a quick peck on the cheek before crossing the room and sitting down at his desk. He picked up one of the ink brushes and pulled out a piece of paper; but, before he began writing, he asked, "If you see Matsumoto, tell her I want to see her."

"Of course."

I vaulted onto the sill of the open window and up onto the wall outside. I could hear him behind me, "Nazeka! Again with the window! Honestly..." I sniggered and jumped down from the wall, leaving the barracks to go pay a visit to the third squad detention center. I wasn't too keen on the fact that I had to go talk to another lieutenant after I had just gotten in that fight, but I had to keep my word.

The barracks were almost empty, every other shinigami patrolling the streets or taking care of fallen members. But even with such low security in the barracks, it took me a while to explain to the third squad members my purpose for being there.

When they let me pass and I was in the detention center, they shut the doors and locked them behind me. In front of me was Kira, sitting quietly in a chair in the middle of the cell, his back turned away from me. I knocked on one of the steel bars.

"Hey, Kira. I'm here on orders from Hitsugaya-taicho and-"

"Hitsugaya-taicho? You're actually calling him by his title now?" He started laughing, but it made me worried. It wasn't his normal laugh.

"Problem? Anyway, I'm here to ask a few questions. It's not my idea, but Hitsugaya-taicho wants me to interrogate you for the examination of Aizen-taicho's death."

"Y-You think I had something to do with it?" He turned around hesitantly, "I was just as surprised as everyone else. You don't really think it was me, do you, Mamori!" The chair toppled over as he ran to the bars. He latched onto two of them violently, "I didn't do it! I wouldn't harm another shinigami!"

"You drew your sword at Hinamori," I said, stepping back a little, "But that's not why I'm here. Now, if you would just sit calmly in the chair again, I'll start the interrogation."

"What happened to all of that talk of not doubting your comrades? You don't really believe that, do you!"

"I said _lieutenants_, Kira, _lieutenants_," I pronounced every syllable, "I don't know enough about the other captains to judge whether they would have some grudge against the others or against the Soul Society. Now, Kira, sit in the chair before I force you in it!"

He picked up the chair and sat down, facing me this time. "There, happy, Mamori?"

"Let's just get this over with. You are no longer permitted to speak when not spoken to, you must simply answer the questions. No further information will be given to you, got it?" He glared, but nodded in understanding. I continued, "So, do you know where Ichimaru Gin-taicho was last night?"

"What are you-"

"Answer the question, Kira."

"No. No I don't know."

"Okay, do you know of anyone that Ichimaru Gin-taicho might have possibly had a grudge on or disliked?"

"No." I could tell by the expression on his face that he figured out what I was insinuating.

"Why did you raise your sword at Hinamori?"

"Because she was going to hurt my captain. That's what we lieutenants are supposed to do."

"Even if she was a fellow shinigami?" I asked, but I didn't wait for an answer, "Why did you not think to restrain her? Why did you immediately see her as an enemy?"

"...I... I didn't... I don't know."

"That's all I came here for. I have to get back and report to Hitsugaya-taicho," I turned around to leave, but something grabbed my sleeve tight.

"Wait, please, Mamori-" Kira pleaded, but I shook my arm roughly, "Let _go_, Kira." I wrenched it away, but he begged again, "Please, please get me out of here! I have to apologize! I have to apologize to Hinamori! Please, let me out!"

"You know I don't have the authority to do that!" I chastised, "Kira! Have some self-respect! Pull yourself together! You're a lieutenant, damn it, so act like you are and suck it up!" I knocked on the door and heard the wooden slats being raised on the other side. The doors opened and I ordered that they keep him as he was.

"Yes, Mamori-fukutaicho," the two guards responded, and they bowed.

"As you were."

I left the barracks and returned to the tenth squad's barracks. I jumped over the wall and back onto the window sill that I had jumped off of earlier.

"Yo! Toushirou! I got some info outta Kira!"

He glared at me, so I groaned, "What now?"

"Stop calling me by my first name!"

"But you call me by my first name unless you're mad. It's not fair!" I whined.

"But I'm a captain. I'm higher up in ranks than you, therefore I don't have to call you by your title."

"But you've never really cared before!"

"Fine!" He threw his hands up in defeat, "If you really want to address me a little more casually, you can. Instead of calling me Hitsugaya-taicho, you can merely call me Hitsugaya." He stood up and approached the window I was in.

"What about Hitsugaya-kun?"

"You're pushing it. Now get out of the window." He pushed me by my shoulders off the sill and I fell back with a thud to the ground.

"_Ow_," I gasped when my back hit the hard dirt and the wind was knocked out of me. He leaned over the window frame and sniggered, "You okay?"

"Oh sure, now you care," I rasped, trying to regain my breath again.

"Stay out of my windows."

"You didn't have to _push_ me."

"It's the only way to get my point across."

"Try closing the windows."

He leaped out the window himself and helped me up while rolling his eyes, "Let's go inside." I placed my hand on the frame again but he narrowed his eyes, "Through the _door_. You know, the thing we open and close to get inside and outside, unlike the _window_?"

"But that's no fun."

"Door. Now."

"Okay, okay, okay. Lead the way 'O Master of Doors.'"

He grabbed my wrist and pulled me away from the window, "Knowing you, you'd tell me to do that and then jump in the window when I wasn't looking."

"What! I wouldn't do that," I exclaimed innocently, but then I murmured and stared at the ground, "You ruin all my fun when you know what I'm going to do."

*Raise your head


	15. Deadline

"Eh! Ukitake-taicho went where, now!"

"T-The detention cell! We're headed over there right now!" Sentaro and Kiyone both saluted. I rolled my eyes, "No need for you two to come. Just stay here and keep an eye on things."

"But, Mamori-fukutaicho, we insist-"

"No. Stay here. We can't have all four of our top officers leaving the barracks at once! Ridiculous."

"Aw, but Kaien would have let us-"

I froze. Kaien. How long had it been since I had heard that name? We'd rarely utter his name after he died, especially around Rukia. "Don't... don't say that name. And don't compare me to him. I'm a different person, understand?"

"Ah, yes ma'am. So, can we go?"

"My answer still stands. Now, I have to go. If I find out you guys left against orders I will kill you two." I shut the door on them and ran from the barracks, annoyed with Ukitake that he hadn't told me where he was going. Weren't the lieutenants supposed to flank their captains?

"Dang it!" I uttered in exasperation. A few other shinigami gave me a strange look, but neither them nor I made too big a deal about my random outburst. The detention center was a good distance away, which didn't make it any easier. However, when I neared the steps, I could already feel a huge amount of reiatsu, all mixed together. I recognized only two of them however: Kuchiki-taicho and Ukitake-taicho. The other one was familiar, but I couldn't tag it to any one person.

I ran through the maze of buildings and finally I reached the right path that led to the outer building that connected the Senzaikyuu to the main part of Sokyoku Hill. But when I reached the building, the reiatsu that I had not recognized had disappeared. I nearly ran into Kuchiki-taicho when he turned the corner, but I made sure not to, or else I would regret it right there and now. "Sorry!" I said, dodging him by a thread. He ignored me. Good ol' Kuchiki-taicho.

On the other side, Ukitake-taicho was standing on the bridge, with Rukia collapsed nearby and Hanataro beside her. Someone I didn't identify was all bloodied up and lying on his back in the middle of the bridge; he was most likely a ryouka.

"Sir! Sir, what happened?" I called, sprinting to Ukitake-taicho's side. He smiled, "Ah, Nazeka, good, you're here. Glad Sentaro and Kiyone got the message to you. So, would you mind getting Unohana-taicho here?"

"Eh, what for?" I asked. It didn't look like any of ours were hurt.

"For that man over there," he gestured to the ryouka. I smiled, "Of course, sir. I will get Unohana-taicho immediately." But before I left, Ukitake sighed and called, "Hey! Sentaro! Kiyone! Come out here!"

The two third-seats jumped out of their hiding spot and kneeled in front of Ukitake-taicho. "You called, taicho, sir!" They both asked. I felt my eye twitch, "You two! What did I say back at the barra-"

"So you did follow me. How long were you there?" Ukitake-taicho asked. Sentaro immediately responded in salute, "From the time you said, 'My, my, how dangerous', and stopped Kuchiki-taicho, taicho, sir!"

"From the very start, then? Didn't I tell you not to come because it was dangerous? You were supposed to stay and tell Nazeka where I was."

"Forgive me, sir! I respect you so very much, that I simply had to follow you here!"

Kiyone pouted, "No fair, Kotsubaki!" She stepped in front of him, "Taicho! I feel the same! I love y... N-No...! I respect you very much!"

"Ha-h! I respect him much, much more than you, by far!"

"Ha-ah! Shut up, Mount Fuji-head!"

"Wanna fight, booger face!"

"Fine with me!"

"Wait... what! How did you two get here before me!" I asked. That just wasn't right.

They stopped right away, "We knew a shortcut, ma'am."

I felt my shoulders sink, "Oh. Well. Uh... teach me that later... when you're not in trouble."

"Yes, ma'am!" They said, saluting. I shook my head and sighed, muttering, "Idiots..."

"Well, never mind," Ukitake-taicho pressed his hand against his forehead, "Anyhow, since you two are here, change of plans. Kiyone, _you_ will contact 4th Squad. One apprehended. Wounded."

"Yes, sir!"

"Send for an advanced relief squad ASAP. Sentaro, you take Kuchiki back to the cell."

"Yes, sir."

I looked at him in astonishment, "We're putting her back? Why!"

"You know the reason, Nazeka. If we let her out, it'll be treason. We can't do anything right now."

I grumbled under my breath, but I obliged to his reasoning. No need to get a captain out with their lieutenant when four others are already gone. I suddenly heard groaning from behind me, and I saw the ryouka shuddering on the ground, bleeding everywhere.

"Sir, is this Kuchiki-taicho's work?" I asked, feeling pity for the man. Note to self, do not _ever_ give Kuchiki-taicho a reason to hurt me.

"Yes. It was ruthless..."

"Um..." A small voice spoke up behind us, and Ukitake asked Hanataro, "You want to know why I'm helping you?"

"Uh... yes."

"Of course, I'll help you. We don't know who killed Aizen yet. And it's very likely that you outsiders know something about it. We can't kill you without investigating first. And above all else... Though your methods were bad, you tried to rescue my subordinate. I can't let you die."

"Actually, uh, sir..." I began, "That's something I came to talk to you about. Hitsugaya is working on the case right now. But, uh, we both suspect something else. However, due to the circumstances, I'd rather we discuss it in private now. It could be considered treasonous as well."

He raised an eyebrow, "Oh? Well, I suppose if it has to do with Aizen's death, it's important."

I nodded, glanced at the ryouka one last time before shouting to Kiyone, "Oi! Kiyone! Knock it off and get going! This ryouka isn't going to last much longer if the relief squad doesn't get here, stat!"

Kiyone and Sentaro stopped fighting and split up, doing their separate duties. I stared at Ukitake-taicho with an extremely irked expression on my face. He chuckled, "What?"

"Are you ever going to call them out! Or do I have to do it every time?"

"I don't mind."

"I do. Man, you are such a lazy captain. You've been hanging around Kyouraku-taicho too much." Ukitake-taicho just laughed again. I rolled my eyes and crouched by the head of the wounded man, "Who is he?"

"I'm not sure."

"Um... his name is Ganju-san," the young shinigami piped up again, "Ganju Shiba."

I felt my body tense up, "S-Shiba? Did you say Shiba!"

"Uh..."

I felt tears well up. It was the second time today that he had been mentioned and it had been months... no, years sense we last talked about him. "Does everyone insist on bringing up old memories today?" I tried to laugh it off, "I guess it's just a coincidence. Ha, ha."

"Nazeka..." Ukitake-taicho sighed, "I know it's painf-"

"What are you talking about, taicho? I'm fine. I'm great, actually!" I said enthusiastically, a fake smile plastered to my face. Before Ukitake-taicho responded, the fourth squad officers appeared, kneeling in front of the both of us.

"Ukitake-taicho, sir!"

"Please, take care of the ryouka here. Also, would you have a look over Kuchiki in the cell? She was very faint."

"But, sir..."

"I expect this job to be completed to its fullest as if they were any normal shinigami. No, as if they were captains themselves."

"Yes, sir!" They bowed their heads and split up, four of them examining the Shiba man and two going to the cell to examine Rukia. "Sir, do you mind if we go and talk about the uh, Aizen-taicho situation?" I urged. He nodded, "Oi, Sentaro! Make sure they're nice to this shinigami here, understood?"

"Yes, sir!"

Ukitake-taicho and I walked back to the barracks together; however, we faced only one challenge on the way back: Ukitake-taicho had a minor attack due to his illness. I immediately took him to his room and helped him settle down back in bed. I grabbed a rag out of one of the closets and handed it to him so he could wipe the blood from his mouth.

"Thank you, Naze- gah!" He started hacking up blood again, coughing into the towel. He moaned and pressed his hand against his forehead again, "Argh, honestly, at a time like this?"

"I'm sure if you rest for a little bit you'll be back on your feet in no time."

He nodded, "Agreed. Now, what was it that you and Hitsugaya thought of?"

"Well, while you were sick, I've been helping Hitsugaya with the investigation of Aizen's murder." I explained everything that we had been ruling out and confirming due to our findings, as well as my belief that it was Ichimaru-taicho that had assassinated Aizen.

"Ichimaru? What are Hitsugaya's thoughts on that suggestion?"

"He agrees. We thought it through, and though we haven't found a decent motive, there is a strong possibility that he did it."

"I see..."

We were interrupted when there was a knock on taicho's door. I opened it, and one of the messengers kneeled at the door, "This is a message for both Juushirou Ukitake-taicho and Nazeka Mamori-fukutaicho. It was signed by both Yamamoto-soutaicho as well as Hitsugaya-taicho. Attention all shinigami, this an urgent update: Kenpachi-taicho was defeated in battle by a single ryouka. Kusajishi-fukutaicho has confirmed it to be the same ryouka that defeated Abarai. That is all."

I nodded, "Thank you." The messenger left and I shut the door. I glanced at Ukitake-taicho, both of our eyes wide. "Taicho... this ryouka... I know who it is. It's Ichigo Kurosaki, the same boy that Kuchiki-taicho said he kil-"

"I know. He was there, at the bridge this afternoon."

"He's getting stronger."

"He is. The question is, what are we going to do? That's another captain, and I'm practically useless."

"Don't say that."

"It's true though, Nazeka. Though after a little while I'll be able to get out of bed again, that doesn't mean I won't have another attack soon."

"But who's to say you'll have one? Maybe you won't. Anyway, I think you should get some rest so it _doesn't_ happen."

"Alright. Take care of the barracks until I'm better, okay?"

"Sir, when have I not?"

"Exactly. Just as a point for the future, you do understand that you're already beginning to think like a captain, right?"

"Meaning...?"

"You already know how the barracks work, how to run one, paperwork, all of the political stuff. Now all you need are some barracks of your own to manage and you'd be a captain."

"Eh..."

"Just think about it. The only difference is that you're the leader. Anything that goes wrong in your squad is something you must take the blame for. It's a big responsibility."

"Which is why I don't want it. Okay, now that we've got that over with, go to bed, taicho!" I opened the door again. He rolled his eyes, "You'll have to talk about it again eventually. You know that right?" He called when I shut the door behind me. I wasn't too interested to hear another speech about how I would make a great captain, wether or not it was from Ukitake-taicho. I was still hardheaded about it. No way... no way was I ever going to be captain during this century!

It was nearing the evening as I walked back to the office. Another end to another day with another captain down for the count. What the hell were these ryouka? Able to withstand all of this? It's completely unrealistic! No, it was completely ridiculous! But then I remembered my promise. That was so stupid of me! These ryouka... the more they fend off captains, the more chaos they cause, the higher on our priority list they are, the worse the death penalty! That is, if they're even willing to kill them after a trial!

I walked into the office and sat down at my desk, putting my feet up on the table. I took out a blank piece of paper and some ink and started scribbling all over the paper like a little five year old. My brain kept running, everything that had happened during the past few days was only now beginning to sink in. If I were to help him... its goodbye Soul Society, hello Sokyoku hill.

"_Maybe you should have thought of that when you agreed to help them."_

"I don't need you criticizing me."

"_Oh no, I don't have a problem with you helping them. You just do what you want. I'm merely pointing out the fact that before you agree to _anything_ just make sure you can pull through without hesitating. Helpful advice: if you ever feel _any_ hesitation in your heart before you agree to something, don't agree. Refuse it, flat out. Hesitation only causes weakness and weakness causes death."_

"Thanks, Syugoryuu."

"_Wow, how long has it been since you've talked to me with a good mood like this?"_

"Don't ruin it."

"_Does that mean no jokes? 'Cause I've got a really good one!" _Instead of simply telling me, he suddenly appeared in front of me, taking up a great deal of room in the office.

"Syugoryuu! Get back inside my head!"

"_But... I wanted to tell you the joke!"_

"And it really requires you to be present here in front of me?" I asked him skeptically. He nodded and changed from his dragon form to his human form... well, _mostly_ human. He sat on my desk and asked,_ "Knock, knock."_

I sighed, "Who's there?"

"_Interrupting cat."_

"...Interrupting ca-"

"_MEOW!" _His smile was ear to ear and he began to chuckle. I stared at him, completely unemotional. He frowned, _"Oh come on, you gotta admit that was funny! Huh? Hilarious, right!"_

"Syugoryuu, you've gotta do better than that. Besides, that did _not_ require you to get out of my head."

His frown turned to a scowl, _"No, but this one did. Knock, knock."_

"Who's there, Syugoryuu?" I scowled as well.

"_Interrupting starfish."_

"Interrupting starf-" Suddenly his palm smashed my face in and he disappeared, "What the hell! Syugoryuu! Get out here!"

"_But you didn't want me out there. Besides, I prefer it in here. I don't have to see your face! How was that?"_

"SYUGORYUU!"

"_No."_

"Syugoryuu! I am your master and you will do as I say! Now get your ass out here!"

"_I don't want to."_

"SYUGORYUU. GET. OUT. HERE. NOW."

He was silent. I thought about going in after him, but decided against it. He was so much bigger than me as a dragon that even if I still wanted to punish him, I wouldn't have much of a chance to do so. He'd crush me before I'd even touch him.

"You are _so_ lucky you're bigger than me."

I put away the ink and threw out the piece of paper on my desk before shutting off the lights and leaving the office. Night had fallen and the Seireitei was quiet as I entered the living quarters, where I soon fell asleep after feeling the exhaustion seep in from the tiring day.

The next day, I woke up a great deal later than I had planned. But, I had made my decision on what I was to do about dealing with the ryouka. I knew where they were being kept. Even though Toushirou couldn't ask me to talk to them as a captain, I would be responsible for my own actions. If this would tell us who killed Aizen, then I would risk it, even if it meant I would lose my rank or execution.

I left the barracks secretly, hoping that no one would ask for my help or try to stop me. Thankfully, I knew I wouldn't have to worry about anyone stopping me in the fourth barracks. They didn't know what I was going to do. I would be performing treason right under their noses.

When I arrived at the barracks, the place was already up and running, everybody running every which way to do whatever they were supposed to. I passed through quickly heading for the stairs to the basement cell. The ryouka were kept down there.

I slipped past the two shinigami watching the hallway and descended the stairs. The voices below me hushed up when they heard the muffled tapping of my feet on the stairs. When I came around the corner, I was extremely surprised to see a familiar face.

"Yo, Ishida." I held up my hand. There were three of them. Ishida, Ganju, and another man I had yet to meet. He looked to be of some other ethnicity. I received surprised gaping faces from them all.

"Ishida... do you know her?" Ganju asked. I smiled, "Good to see you're doing much better. You took quite a beating from Kuchiki-taicho, Ganju Shiba."

"How the hell do you know my name!" His face was pure shock.

"My captain and I were the one that helped you after you were injured by Kuchiki-taicho. You should honestly have a much better attitude for me."

"What, that you locked me up in here?"

"That we didn't execute you on the spot. Same for Hanataro. Normally for treasonous actions like that, we would put him up for execution but... my captain and I have a different view of the situation than the rest of the Gotei 13."

"Uh, so, Nazeka, you told Inoue and I-" Ishida began. I nodded, "I know. I know I made that promise. But then I thought about it... and well, my zanpakutou helped me make the decision on what I was going to do. And I'll do it full out. The Gotei 13 is wrong, and Rukia doesn't deserve to be executed. I will risk my rank of lieutenant and my life to help you guys achieve your goal with this Kurosaki kid."

"But, don't you guys think we killed one of your captains?" The guy in the back spoke up. I smiled, "Who are you?"

"Yasutora Sado."

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Nazeka Mamori-fukutaicho of the thirteenth squad," I bowed. "In answer to your question, most of the shinigami here believe that. It's a pretty plausible idea. However, Hitsugaya-taicho and my own captain, Ukitake-taicho, as well as myself, believe that Aizen-taicho wasn't assassinated by any of you. Hitsugaya-taicho and myself believe that it was another captain, but we're not quite sure. We're looking into that now. But, that's why I came here. I wanted to get liable proof that the claims we're making are correct. So, if I could just get a little amount of your reiatsu, I can analyze it side-by-side with the reiatsu found in small traces on Aizen-taicho's body."

I pulled out three white popsicle stick-like devices and handed each of them one. I had never used one of these gadgets from the Technology Department myself, but I had seen others perform this task and it didn't look painful, "Alright, just concentrate on putting your reiatsu in the device and when it's full of your reiatsu, it'll glow blue. Just hand it to me when it's done."

I waited patiently for all three of them and soon I had all of them and put away in my shihakushou. I thanked them, and then turned to Ganju, "Ganju..."

"What?" He ground his bottom jaw as if annoyed.

"Did you know a man named... Kaien Shiba?"

His face went from annoyed to shock in an instant. I nodded, "I assumed so."

"He was my brother. How did you know him?"

"He was... he was a good friend of mine. When I first arrived here as a soul, he helped me out in the beginning. You see he was lieu-" I stopped when a Hell Butterfly flew in and paused in front of me. I held out my finger and listened closely.

"_Reporting to the Captains and Lieutenants. A change has been made concerning the execution date for prisoner Rukia Kuchiki. The execution will take place twenty-nine hours from now. This ruling is final. There will be no further changes. That is all."_

This time, I was the one whose face was plastered with shock. The Hell Butterfly left and I backed up to lean against the wall. _We have such little... such little time now! What are we going to do!_

"What's wrong?" Ishida asked. I told them the news. "You guys... I'll do what I can. I'm going to find a way to stop this execution, you understand? But for now, you're going to have to stay here. Just give me some time. I have to go find one of the captains right now."

I ran up the stairs and carefully looked around before entering the hallway and shutting the door behind me. I locked it and watched for any other shinigami before turning the corner. However, immediately, Rangiku and Toushirou left one of the rooms. I dashed back behind the corner. They just startled me, so I regained my composure and turned the corner again. He was exactly who I was looking for.

"Toushirou!" I called, running up to him while he had his hand on the doorway. It was sealed with a filmy yellow barrier. A kido I easily recognized.

"Nazeka, what did I say about calling me-argh, forget it. What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you. Did you get the announcement yet?"

"What announcem-"

"Sir!" Rangiku said, a Hell Butterfly perched on her finger. He sighed, "Oh, that announcement."

"Yeah, the higher ups made a ridicu-"

"Taicho!" Rangiku said urgently. She repeated the same message that I had received, and Toushirou looked at me in shock. I lowered my eyes, "Yeah, and mostly likely..."

"Once we capture all the ryouka, they'll be killed too."

"Toushirou, I've made my decision. What's yours?"

He stared at the floor for a long time before raising his head and walking down the hallway, "Let's go, Matsumoto, Nazeka."

"Taicho?" Rangiku asked. He glanced back at the both of us and stopped, "The execution and the release of the Sokyoku's power... If that's Ichimaru's aim, I can't let this execution proceed. Come with me, Matsumoto, Nazeka. We're stopping the execution."

"Yes, sir!" Matsumoto and I said. We followed him out of the barracks, myself confident in the decision I had made. As long as I wasn't the only one, I felt a little more comfortable. Rangiku asked where we were going, and Toushirou said that we were going to the Daireisho Archives. Maybe there was something in there that could explain the importance of Rukia being executed.

"So what was that about Ichimaru and the release of the Sokyoku's power?" I asked, remembering what he had said. Tension rose between the three of us, and I knew that something bad had happened. I asked a different question, "Who was behind the barrier?" This time, Toushirou stiffened.

"Was it Hinamori?"

"...Yes."

"Last night... someone's spiritual pressure spiked. It was yours, wasn't it?"

"Yeah. Ichimaru... I believe he tampered with Aizen's letter."

"Letter? What letter?"

"Hinamori was given a letter addressed to her. Aizen apparently wrote it before he died, but... I think it was tampered with. It even said that... that..."

"What?"

"That _I_ was the one who wants to release the power of the Sokyoku. Hinamori... Hinamori believed it."

"And she attacked you. I see... I'm sorry, Toushirou."

"Now no one can hurt her. She's behind that barrier that you saw."

"I'd be more concerned that she's going to come after you again."

He said nothing. I felt bad for Rangiku. It must have been so awkward for her to just walk with us and listen to our conversation. Especially when it was an awkward conversation to begin with.

"So, about the Sokyoku... how exactly do you release its power?"

"That's what we're going to find out. I'm not even sure if that part's true or not but... we'll just have to see."

We arrived at the Archives. It's usually off limits even for captains, but I was sure they'd make an exception for us because of our reasons. Toushirou knocked on the door, announcing, "This is Hitsugaya Toushirou-taicho of the tenth squad! Matsumoto Rangiku-fukutaicho of the tenth squad and Mamori Nazeka-fukutaicho of the thirteenth squad are here with me. Please, let us in!"

There was no answer. I reached for the door handle, to see if we could get in, but Toushirou stopped my hand, warning, "If anyone tries to get in by force, the alarm will go off. Then we definitely won't have a chance of getting in."

I nodded and stood back. He tried again, "This is Hitsugaya-taicho! Let us in! We wish to perform research on what could possibly affect the entire survival of the Seireitei! It is important for us to enter immediately!"

Yet again, there was no answer. I sighed, "Well, so much for getting in peacefully."

"Why aren't they answering?"

"Why don't we just go to the library? Maybe there's something there..."

"About the Sokyoku? I doubt it. It's mainly census records and information about all of us and the rest of the citizens of Soul Society. I highly doubt there's something there about the Sokyoku."

"We could always look for records of other people being executed by the Sokyoku. That's a good place to start. Other than that, we honestly don't know where to start. There's the history, what the Sokyoku is, it's power, and so on."

He frowned. I was right. Duh. But he looked back at the door of the Archives. I sighed, "Just standing here won't get us anywhere. Make a decision Toushirou. Are we going to the library or are we going to try to get in?"

He crouched near the base of the door and brushed his finger along the edge. I hadn't noticed, but a dark crusty substance was along the bottom of the door.

"Is that...?"

"Blood. Old enough to have been done a while ago. We're getting in, Nazeka. Whether they want us to or not. You two, stand back." He drew his sword as Matsumoto and I complied. He made a single slash in the wood, large enough that it split the whole thing in two. He pushed on the side with the hinges and stepped through, "Let's go."

Matsumoto went first, I following her and letting the half of the door fall shut. There was no alarm, no order to leave, nothing. It was dead silent. Toushirou was staring at something behind me, grimacing. I spun around and nearly screamed. The single guard that took care of this place was stabbed in the gut on the wall. He hung there limp. He was killed a long time ago.

"Tch, what the hell? What is going on here?" I grimaced, pulling the lodged sword from his stomach. He crumpled to the floor and I tossed the katana to the side.

"Something's going on... but what it is I have no idea..."

"Taicho!" Matsumoto called from the room beyond. She waved, "I've got it up and running!"

We both ran into the next room. Toushirou went to the main controls and typed in 'Sokyoku', Matsumoto and I waiting for something to go through. But when a few of the results started coming up, a red screen came up, flickering the message, "Access Denied. Password required."

"Password?" Matsumoto asked. I pressed my face into my hands, "We're screwed."

Toushirou groaned, "How the hell am I supposed to know the password!"

I slammed my fist on part of the machine, and the red screen disappeared. More results came up. I smiled, "Ha! Take that you stupid-"

Then, the screen went blank altogether. I backed away, defeated, muttering, "Oops."

"Nazeka..." Toushirou uttered threateningly.

"I didn't mean to! It's not my fault it can't handle a little physical punishment!"

"It's a _machine_! It's not supposed to handle things like that! Haven't you ever worked with something like this before?"

"No! We lieutenants don't get access to stuff like this! Jeez... what are we going to do now?"

"I don't know! You tell me! You were the one who just ruined our chances of finding out about the Sokyoku! You're such an idiot!"

"Shut up! We can go to the library, like I mentioned before."

"Seems like that's the only thing we _can_ do right now."

"You know what, you should've gotten the password first! Had you thought this through, we probably wouldn't be in this mess."

"Or, had you been patient and let me go find the password instead of slamming your fist on it, we could've avoided this!"

"You two... cut it out please?" Matsumoto sighed.

"He started it!"

"No, she started it!"

"Shut up both of you! Let's just do what we need to. Taicho?"

He shut his eyes and fixed his haori around his neck before sighing, "Fine. We can go to the library like Nazeka suggested earlier."

I smirked, "Let's go!"

"You're not the captain."

"Oh, whatever."

He stepped past me and clambered through the destroyed door, motioning for us to follow.

"Thanks, Matsumoto."

"It's no big deal. Anything to keep taicho from getting too hotheaded."

We followed Toushirou out and flash-stepped to the library with him. I told him that I would look on the top floor for information. They were the earliest records. He would search the bottom floor with Matsumoto.

We spent a little over five hours just searching. In that time, we managed to find a total of four accounts, all on the top floor. Over thousands of years, it was impressive the lack of executions by Sokyoku. You'd think that those jerks over at Central 46 would've executed a lot more.

"This one just states that they were executed by Sokyoku. Nothing else. And... this one says the same. Same with this one."

"This one is the same. Well, so much for getting information this way."

"Hm... well, it's kind of like the kido cannon, right? It's sealed up and requires several people release it."

"It also has the attack power of one million zanpakutou in it's single blade... and the takka has the same defense power."

"Well then, if it's main seal is kido, then maybe the records on those in the kido corps can tell us who made it and, if possible, information on its true power." I got up from the table and headed for the stairs again. It took me less time this time, but by the time I got downstairs again with eight books, Toushirou was resting with his head against his hand.

"Where'd Rangiku go?" I asked. He shrugged, "She asked if she could go."

"You actually let her?"

"Well, if you're here helping, it's fine."

"Helping? I'm the one doing all the work."

"I'll look through those records. Just hand them over."

"Fine. Here," I handed him the books and sat down at the table, yawning, "What time is it?"

"Hm... I would think around... two o'clock?"

"Already? No wonder I'm starving. Want me to go get us something?"

"Sure."

"Anything in particular?"

I received no answer. He was already scouring the first book for any information. I shrugged and left the room, off to fetch us a meal.

Later that evening, we had finally searched through every record we could think of that might possibly hold some sort of information on the Sokyoku. But even through all that, we didn't find what we were looking for. We had searched through more than sixty records, yet we still didn't find any information on the release of the Sokyoku.

Toushirou through down one of the books in fury, "Why can't we find anything! There's absolutely nothing in here about the Sokyoku's release!" He shoved several of the books of the table, causing more of them to fall off in a pile. He put his head in his hands and groaned, "Damn it all."

I picked up the books and set them neatly on the table, hoping he wouldn't throw another fit. "Maybe that part was forged. Maybe Ichimaru wanted us to spend all day looking for some information that didn't exist. It certainly seems like something he'd do."

"I don't know anymore. Everything... everything seems to be falling apart."

"That's not true. Once we figure everything out, it's going to be fine."

"But we don't know what anything is anymore! We don't know if the information that Ichimaru gave is true! We can't tell what's real or not anymore."

I couldn't argue with that. There was no way for us to tell who was being truthful anymore.

"Okay, well, let's think this through agai-"

"No. I'm going back. I can't think straight right now. Could you clean up the books for me? Sorry, but I'll see you tomorrow."

I sighed, "Fine, make me do all the work. No, go ahead and go home."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," I rolled my eyes while picking up the first stack. He stood up and didn't say a word after that. Once he was gone, I slammed the books back down and rested my forehead agains the top one, groaning, "Everything's falling apart, Toushirou. You were right. I just didn't want to admit it when you were around. Sorry."


	16. Revelations

"Mamori-fukutaicho! Bad news!" Sentaro popped through the window, and I shrieked as I quickly tightened the opening of my kosode* and kicked him back out of the window. "Do you realize that there is a reason for doors and we have a thing called 'knocking,' Sentaro!"

I heard him from under the window, "S-Sorry, fukutaicho."

"There is never a dull morning around here... he's just lucky that I was pretty much done. I think we'd be out one 3rd Seat had he popped in earlier." I muttered under my breath as I tucked in the black kosode and tied it up with my obi belt. There was a knock on the door. I groaned, "Come in."

The door slid open, and this time it was both Sentaro and Kiyone that kneeled before me. "Wow... they multiply by the minute..." I murmured.

"Excuse me, Mamori-fukutaicho, please forgive Sentaro's lapse of judgment. I assure that I would never-" Kiyone began, but Sentaro hit her on the head, "You were all for it, Kiyone! Don't go blamin' it on me!"

"Are you kidding! You never just pop into a girl's window in the morning!" She yelled back, but then turned to me, "Please, Mamori-fukutaicho, I would never ever intrude on your peace in the morning unless in dire circumstances such as-"

"No, no, Mamori-fukutaicho, allow me to punish myself for the ignorance I performed earlier. I shall-"

"Mamori-fukutaicho!"

"Mamori-fukutaicho!"

As they argued back and forth between themselves, I could feel all respect I had for them slowly slipping away... my sanity going with it. I took a deep breath, hit them both on the head to shut them up and shouted, "What did you two want to tell me!"

They both opened their mouth and I knew another argument was coming. Who was going to tell me? "Scratch that. Rewind. Sentaro, this is a chance to redeem yourself. Now, what is so important that you felt the need to announce it by jumping into my window?"

Kiyone looked downtrodden, but Sentaro eagerly reported, "Ukitake-taicho wants to see you! The execution is happening in about an hour."

It took a second for this to sink in, but when it did, I jumped to my feet and let out one more annoyed remark, "Next time tell me the important stuff before you waste my time with your petty arguing!" before grabbing Syugoryuu from my bedside and my lieutenant badge and shoving past them out into the hallway. Leave it to me to sleep in late one of the most critical days of my life.

"Wait! Mamori-fukutaicho! Hitsugaya-taicho wanted me to give you this when you woke up!"

I froze, waiting for whatever it was. Kiyone handed me a piece of paper folded up. I opened it and read the words:

_I've decided. I'm going to confront Central 46 head on. Don't do anything rash. Do as Ukitake tells you and leave this to me._

_ -Toushirou_

I crumpled the paper in my hand and sighed, "Fine, take the fun out of it for me." I tossed it through the door to my room and slipped my waraji sandals on. The two 3rd Seats followed me to Ukitake's quarter's, but his house was empty and his bedroom door was still closed and locked. I knocked on the double doors, "Ukitake-taicho, you wanted to see me?"

There was no answer, so I knocked louder, "Ukitake-taicho! Sir, you wished to see me?" Still, no answer. I rolled my eyes and said, "Alright, fine. Kiyone, Sentaro, let me know when he comes out."

"Where are you going?" Kiyone asked.

"I'm just going to sit outside. When he wants to come out, he'll come out." I turned around to leave, but called towards the room one last time, "You know Rukia's execution will be happening in an hour, so I suggest you get a move on with whatever it is you plan on doing!" I walked outside, replaying what I had just said in my head. Sure, it sounded ruder than what I had intended, but it's kind of important that he got his butt out of there.

I sat on his porch for what seemed like an eternity watching his pond of koi fish in boredom. Finally, something exciting happened... well, not so much as exciting as terrifying. A huge blue fire erupted from the Sokyoku Hill, and I could hear Sentaro shout, "This is bad, Kiyone! The execution has begun! Isn't the captain ready yet!"

_Brilliant, just brilliant_, I thought, anxiously pacing on the porch until I heard the doors open. Ukitake-taicho walked outside carrying a large shield and some sort of thick spear. "Taicho, what exactly is that?"

"The weapon we're going to use to destroy the Sokyoku."

I blinked in disbelief, "Uh... then we should get going."

He nodded and we all flash-stepped away from the barracks and towards the Sokyoku Hill. Time was running out, and we hurried as fast as we could to the top. It was rather difficult since Ukitake had the huge shield to drag along. We were not even at the steps when the blue flame erupted into a large phoenix. "What's that?" I panted, trying to get a look at it while watching where I was going.

"That's the Sokyoku's real form. We have to hurry, or we'll be too late!" Ukitake explained, and he flash-stepped forward. All three of us followed him closely. My heart was pounding, time was running out. I had a strange notion in the back of my mind that told me we were going to be too late.

We reached the steps and pushed ourselves to our limit. A huge screech sounded from the Hill. I could only imagine what that meant. Tears welled up in my eyes as my feet pounded the earthen stairs. _Please don't be over. Please don't let it be over before we get there._ I prayed in my head, agonized over the lack of knowledge we had. What was going on up there?

The immense reiatsu the Sokyoku emitted was incredible. It was hard to ignore. It blocked everyone else's presence. I couldn't tell if Rukia was still up there or not. It didn't matter since her reiatsu was probably still locked up anyway.

Just a few more steps to go. A little farther. Just a little farther. I kept chanting that in my head to push me forward, to not give up.

When we ran out of steps, we met a forest in our path. Ukitake disappeared beyond the thicket. Without any hesitation or premise to what I would see beyond, I followed him, leaving the other two a step behind. I had to know. I had to tell my eyes that it wasn't too late.

The great phoenix reared, screeching in anger. It shot forward, ready to destroy whatever was in front of it. But a giant rod with a rope attached wrapped around its neck. It stopped dead in its tracks while the rod shot towards the ground and dug into the earth. _Ukitake._ I thought, and I flash-stepped to his side. Very few people had shown up, but the person that shocked me the most was Kuchiki-taicho.

Above all of us was the Sokyoku phoenix, and across from it was the execution stand. At the top was Rukia, but in front of her was a man I had never seen before. _Is that...?_

Kyouraku stepped up and placed his hand on the rod that had dug into the ground with Nanao by his side, "Hey there, Mr. Handsome. You made us wait a while."

"Sorry, breaking the seal took a while. However..." he threw the shield into the ground, "This ought to do it!"

Both of them jammed their zanpakutou into the two slots on the shield and the rope around the Sokyoku's neck began glowing orange. Once the entire rope was consumed, the phoenix erupted into flame and rained on everybody, the shockwave knocking back some of the people who had released the thing. The sky became visible once again, and when I looked back up, the man was standing on the wooden execution stand, his ridiculously huge zanpakutou raised. He began spinning it above him using the cloth on its hilt, and with one fell swoop, the stand was showered in a thick cloud of dust as a huge explosion came from beneath it.

When the dust cleared, there was a huge gap in the horizontal beam, and Rukia was in the man's arms... well, sort of.

"He destroyed it!" Sentaro forced out, all of us in awe at the raw power this man had.

"Is that... is that Kurosaki Ichigo?" I asked Ukitake, and he nodded. I knew it. I knew it from the moment I saw him. The power I felt coming from him now that the overshadowing reiatsu from the Sokyoku had disappeared was insane. There was more to him than he was letting on.

"So now what do we do?"

"Good question. I suppose we wait to see what _he_ does."

Suddenly, Ichigo lifted Rukia into the air and threw her down towards the ground. I glanced in the direction he was throwing her to see Renji. Thank goodness for that. He caught her, but skidded several feet backward from the force. After screaming at Ichigo, he picked Rukia up and took off.

"Don't just stand there, you fools! After them! All lieutenants, go!" Soifon-taicho ordered, but I just stood there idly. Ukitake had more power over me than she did. Kotetsu-san, Oomaeda-san, and Sasakibe-san all chased after him, swords drawn. But before they even had a chance to catch up with Renji, Ichigo flash-stepped in front of them. He stabbed his zanpakutou into the ground and took them out one by one without even so much as looking them in the eye.

Next thing I knew, he was up against Kuchiki-taicho, their blades pressed against each other. Then Kiyone was calling for her sister and running toward the fallen lieutenant. Sentaro chased after her, trying to get her to stop. There was a flash of black and white, and Sentaro was on the ground. Soifon-taicho stood between him and Kiyone, who was frozen with fear.

"Hold it, Soifon!" Ukitake yelled, and he ran to his 3rd seat's defense. He was stopped by Yamamoto-soutaicho himself. "Do not move!" He commanded.

"Genryusai-dono!" Ukitake murmured in disbelief.

"It was a lieutenant that took off with the criminal. We can always find a replacement. We can take our time capturing him. However... I cannot forgive you two! As captains, you have done something you must not have done. I'm sure you both understand what that is."

There was a pause as tensions began to rise. He infuriated me. He's talking about Renji as if he's some pawn that could be thrown away and easily replaced with another!

"What are you saying, Soutaicho! I can't believe you would talk about a fellow comrade like he's trash! Renji can't simply be replaced! He is who he is and no one can replace him! No one can be Renji. If anyone's the trash it's you who would just throw away their subordinates because they-"

"That's enough, Nazeka." Ukitake warned.

"But, Taicho, he-"

"I said that's enough!"

"Ukitake-taicho, you're in danger!" Kiyone said, going around Soifon-taicho, but Ukitake ordered her back too, "Stay back, Kiyone!" He shook his head. The tension rose even further, but Kyouraku broke the silence easily, "Well, we've got no choice!" He tipped his hat and grabbed Ukitake's shoulder, "Guess we should make a run for it, Ukitake!"

"Whaa-?" Ukitake managed to say that much before the two of them disappeared, leaving Nanao-san and I behind. We looked at each other before chasing after them over the side of the cliff. We fell silently, speeding toward the ground that rose up with such ferocity that I doubted my ability to land safely.

Before we hit the earth, we flash-stepped off the cliffside and through the streets until we came to an already damaged part of town. It took Nanao-san and I a little longer to catch up with them though, and we obviously arrived a little late.

Kyouraku chuckled, "Nanao-chan... you're last!"

"You two are two fast!" She complained, panting, and I nodded, "You can't expect us to hold our own against two captains, now can you Kyouraku-san?"

I didn't get a response; someone else had already gained their attention, and I knew right away who it was. There was no way to avoid him.

"I must say, you got here fast." Kyouraku applauded the Soutaicho, who just replied bitterly, "No brats have ever been successful escaping from me. Now come, you greenhorns! But just my fists won't do any longer." He stood up, and his surrounding reiatsu became quite clear. It was subtle at first, but as he grew closer, the fiery force swept over me like a windstorm. It was heavy, pushing me down to my knees as it sucked every breath from my lungs. He was everywhere. There was no way to escape.

I could hear Syugoryuu roar inside my head, his temper rising. It was like some intruder had entered my mind and was shutting me down from the inside. There was no simple off switch. I couldn't escape this strange mixture of fear, paranoia, and madness. I couldn't fight it.

"It's okay, Nazeka. You shouldn't be here. I know Toushirou sent you a note. Why don't you go find out what he's up to, okay? Go on. You're strong, I know you can get out of this."

Ukitake's voice cut through the weight, and I nodded slowly, feeling as though my head would fall off at the slightest movement. He helped me to my feet, and I turned around, teetering on my feet. I would shunpo. I would. I would try my hardest. I needed to get out. Focus on the next objective. Get out.

The weight lifted, the madness disappeared, and felt my face hit some grass. I had fallen face first. Where was I? _"Nazeka, get your head on straight. You gotta go find Toushirou."_ Right. I knew that. Wait... who was Toushirou? _"Focus, Nazeka."_ Right, right, I know, I know. So what am I doing? I'm lying in the grass. Why am I in the grass? Oh, that's right, I had collapsed. Why again? I'm tired. That's right, but why? Oh yeah, I was with Ukitake-taicho and Kyouraku-taicho. But why am I here again? Right, I was with them, but Yamamoto-soutaicho's reiatsu was to much and I got out of there. But wait, where's here?

I sat up and looked around. I was in front of my house. Whoops, not where I had intended. At least I hadn't overshot it and landed in Rukongai. I shook my head, hoping that would clear my head. Not really, but I got to my feet anyway.

I couldn't remember what I was supposed to be doing. _"Find Toushirou. Ukitake told you to, remember?"_

_He did? When?_

"_Before you left. Jeez, do you have brain damage or something?"_

_Shut up._

Okay, now where did Toushirou say he was going? Now I couldn't remember that. What the heck was wrong with me! I tried to calm myself down. All I had to do was find the note from this morning I had thrown in my room. Why is it that I could remember I threw it in my room but I couldn't remember what was written on the note? What did Yamamoto-soutaicho do to me!

I threw off my sandals and dove into my room, searching for the crumpled little piece of paper. It was easy to find, thank goodness my room was so clean. Central 46. That's right, he had gone to Central 46.

Putting my sandals back on, I ran out of the barracks and down the street, making a left at the nearest turn, heading for Inner Seireitei. It took me longer than I thought. Someone had been fighting, and there were toppled over buildings and walls that blocked my way at times, but I jumped over them and sometimes even ran on the rooftops. But eventually I reached the gates. They were already open, and I could see down the pathway that the door had collapsed.

I felt a bit awkward, entering the area for Central 46, but I would just have to get over that. I was just hoping no one would blame me for the door as I climbed through it. It was dark, but I could see the stairway. I fought my own hesitation and bolted through the darkness, descending down multi-levels of stairs. There was a doorway at the bottom, but what was beyond that nearly made me scream at the sudden view. Every one of the members of Central 46 were dead, lying there in their own blood that was spattered on the walls, chairs, and desks.

"Woah, wasn't expecting that. As much as I hated these guys, this is... quite unnerving..." I wiped my finger on some of the blood. It was black and hard, crumbling at my touch. "They've been dead for some time. Good riddance." I lifted the head of the nearest guy and stared long and hard at him, "So you're the guys that made Toushirou and Kusaka fight, huh?" I slammed the guys head into the desk, "I should've done that to you a long time ago! To all of you! You made him suffer! Both of them! I'm sick of all of you and I'm glad you're dead! You can't torture anyone else now!"

"_Nazeka, you're losing focus!"_

_I don't care!_

"_Nazeka, what if something goes wrong? You. Need. To. Focus."_

_Fine..._

I ditched the dead guys and walked down one of the other hallways, but it only lead to a maze of more corridors. After spending an eternity finding my way back, I took the second hallway on the opposite side of the room with the dead members. It lead to a larger hallway, and was once again dark. It grew colder the closer I got to the end, and soon I was walking on small crystals of ice. I quickened my pace and finally came to the opening at the end, slipping on the now ice-covered floor. The entire place was encased in a thin layer of ice and I could see the steam rise from my mouth as the temperature dropped increasingly.

Unohana-taicho and Kotetsu-san were already here, and in front of them was a swirl of cloth that glowed brighter as Kotetsu-san approached it, ready to draw her sword. But in a flash of light, it disappeared.

"Hello, Mamori-fukutaicho," Unohana-taicho greeted me without so much as looking at me.

"Ah, hello, Unohana-taicho. What was...?"

"It seems we were all mistaken. Aizen is not dead. That was him and Ichimaru just now."

"Uh...?" I stared at the back of her head. What? Did I hear that correctly?

"It's true. Isane, please find out where they went."

"Yes ma'am!" Kotetsu-san pulled out a jar of ink and began drawing on the floor in front of her while chanting, "Hearts of the South, Eyes of the North, Fingertips of the West, Heels of the East... Gather holding the winds, scatter sweeping the rains. Bakudo 58! Kakushitsuijaku!" The drawing began to glow, but while she did her thing, I looked around at the room. The ice was no doubt Toushirou's work.

"Unohana-taicho-"

"It's the Sokyoku!" Kotetsu-san interrupted me.

"Understood. Now locate every captain and lieutenant and report to them everything we've learned here about Sosuke Aizen and where he's gone to." Unohana-taicho began heading for the steps that were covered in ice.

"Uh, Unohana-taicho-"

"And... get the message to those ryouka as well." She began climbing the steps.

"Ahem, ah, Unohana-taicho... Where is Hitsugaya-" I was interrupted for the third time. Now I was annoyed. I just wanted to know where Toushirou went, dang it!

"I'm counting on you. I must now try to save the lives of Hitsugaya-taicho and Hinamori-fukutaicho." She drew her sword as a green light appeared.

"Wait, what! Toushirou is...?" I tried to process everything that was going on. I had missed so much. Just what happened here? I raced up the steps and looked to the left. Momo was lying on her side, but Unohana-taicho was already working on her. That meant that to my right was...

"Toushirou!" I screamed as I saw him, lying facedown in the very ice he had created. I sprinted to his side, slipping a few times and nearly falling off the platform we were on. A long bloody gash reached around his right shoulder and onto his back. It was already frozen over to keep any more blood from spilling, but the iced over platform was already covered in his blood. He still had a tight grip on his sword; his eyes were a blank stare.

"Toushirou?" I asked hesitantly. No response, not that I was expecting anything. "Hey, c'mon now. Y-You can't just... no, you can't just die on me here," my voice trembled and I could feel tears welling up. I tried hard to fight them, "No. Wake up, Toushirou. Show me you're still alive." I rolled him over so he was on his back and pried his sword from his cold hand. It was like ice too.

"Mamori-fukutaicho." Unohana-taicho's voice startled me. I turned to look at her, "Yes, ma'am?"

"Will you start treating him? All you have to do is remove the ice from his wound and use some of the basic healing kido you learned at the Academy until I get over there.

"Yes, ma'am, of course." I walked around him and kneeled next to his shoulder. The ice was thick and made my fingers numb to the bone when I pulled on it. There was no way to get it off without hurting him even more. _Syugoryuu, tell Hyourinmaru to lay off so the ice will melt._

"_Fine. Yo, Hyourinmaru!"_

A few seconds later, the ice began to defrost and soon disappeared. The only problem was that the blood began running again. I tore off the left sleeve of my kosode and pressed it against the wound to sap up some of the blood before I began to use the healing kido.

Then suddenly, Kotetsu-san's voice rang in my head: "Attention all Gotei 13 Captains, lieutenants, and seated officers... and also the ryouka. This is Squad 4 Lieutenant, Isane Kotetsu. This is an emergency. This is an emergency announcement from Squad 4 Retsu Unohana-taicho and me, Isane Kotetsu. Everything I'm about to tell you is the truth!"

She explained everything she and Unohana-taicho had discovered just before I had arrived and what had happened to Momo and Toushirou. I shook my head in disbelief, "I can't believe it... I mean, I remember thinking it odd when I saw his calm expression... but I guess I couldn't come up with a better explanation, so I really believed it was real. My instincts were right, and now everyone's paying for it..."

I removed the sleeve and held my hands over the wound. It was deep, and the bleeding wouldn't stop. The sleeve was soaked, and my hands were bloody just from holding it there. A green glow enveloped my hands as I began the kido and tried to hold my hands still.

I hated that my hands continued to shake, no matter how hard I tried to hold them still. I didn't really know what I was doing. There was so much blood, all over the ice and his clothes and even some spattered on his face and in his hair. His eyes kept staring up at the ceiling half-closed.

A piece of time from long ago appeared in my mind, wrenched from the confines of my memories from the sight of the blood. So much blood. A limp body. Lifeless eyes. More blood, screaming. Death.

My death.

I tried to shake it from my mind, push it away. I realized that I was crying, so I tried to wipe the tears away with my upper arms.

"Mamori-fukutaicho, I will take it from here." Unohana-taicho had appeared behind me, silently. It made me jump, but it was the jump I needed to change my mindset.

"Yes, ma'am."

I didn't want to watch, but I couldn't bring myself to leave. I sat on the cold steps, and I had the awful realization that I was one of the only higher ranking shinigami that hadn't had to fight a single battle. I didn't have a single scratch on me, and the only blood was Toushirou's.

"_Just think of yourself as lucky."_

_Lucky? You've got to be kidding me. I didn't do anything. I followed Ukitake around like a little dog and ended up coming here to learn that I was too late to do anything anyway._

"_It could be worse. You could helpless and lying on the ground like him."_

_At least that meant I would've done something. I'm not hurt, and everyone else at least got hurt or did something. I know it's weird to think that I'm left out because I didn't get hurt, but I feel guilty over it._

"_What's done is done. There's nothing you can do now. Don't hold onto it, because you're not going to change the past."_

_I know, I know. It's hard though._

"_Would a joke help?_

_No._

"_Okay, good, 'cause I can't think of one right now."_

"Mamori-fukutaicho, I'm going to transport these two to the 4th Squad Barracks. I've done all that I can for them here. My subordinates will finish up at the barracks, but for now, they are stable. They will live, but it's up to them to wake up."

I nodded, but she wasn't done, "However, I do need help carrying them outside."

"Oh, yes, ma'am." I climbed the steps again. Kotetsu-san was already picking up Momo, so I went back to Toushirou's side. It then occurred to me that this was probably going to end up being one of the strangest things I have ever done. I took a deep breath and grimaced as I picked him up, trying to be careful with this shoulder and back.

It was so very... backwards. I tried not to think about it too much, but when Kotetsu-san saw my face and giggled a little, I couldn't help but roll my eyes and groan.

"He will never know of this."

"Of course not, Mamori."

"I'm serious! He cannot find out about this!"

"You're turning red."

"S-Shut up! This is very... awkward for me."

"Hurry up you two," Unohana-taicho called, already in the hallway, "Don't slip down the stairs, now."

I felt overly conscious of the ice on the stairs after she said that, but luckily made it down safely. _Syugoryuu, you can't tell him either. Neither can Hyourinmaru. If either of you tell him, I will skin you alive. _The only response I got was a malicious chuckle. ...Great.

After about fifteen awkward minutes, we made it outside. Unohana-taicho drew her zanpakutou again, but this time, it morphed into this huge green creature that looked like a combination between a whale, a bird, and a sting ray. The creature ate both Momo and Toushirou, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for the two as they sat in its belly. Apparently, it helps them heal, but I couldn't see what made sitting inside some weird creature's stomach made anything better.

Unohana-taicho, Kotetsu-san, and I rode on its back on the way to the 4th Squad barracks. Once we arrived, the creature spit them right back out again, and some members from the squad carried them into the barracks for treatment.

"Mamori-fukutaicho, Isane will take care of them. I am heading for Sokyoku Hill. Ukitake-taicho should be up there as well. Perhaps you should check in with him. I will give you a ride."

"Thank you, Unohana-taicho."

I hadn't realized at first, but the sun was already almost done setting. It was bright, but it was neat to see it from the weird creature so high up. We reached the top of the hill in no time at all, and I thanked Unohana-taicho one last time before I looked around the top of the hill. I didn't see my captain. Oh well, I would just have to get down myself. But what caught my eye, was the ryouka.

I approached them, hoping they would recognize me as a friend. The tall one, Sado, saw me first. He must have said something, because all heads turned toward me. I gave a small wave, "Hey there. Glad to see you guys are out of that prison." Then I remembered my hands were covered in blood from before, and I stopped waving.

"Nazeka?" Ishida said, sounding surprised that I was there.

"Oh great, you're back." Ganju muttered. Orihime was concentrating on an orange barrier surrounding a man lying on the ground, Ichigo Kurosaki, but she managed a friendly hi. I stood next to her and looked down at the man, who seemed surprised that his friends knew me.

"Who are you?"

"You must be Ichigo. Rukia's told me a lot about you," I folded my arms behind my back and smiled, "Hi, I'm Nazeka Mamori. I wanted to thank you for everything you did for Rukia. You saved one of my closest friends and subordinates, and saved the Soul Society. I don't think there's any way for me to express my eternal gratitude." I bowed, but when I straightened up again, he had the same dumbfounded expression on his face.

"Uh... it's no problem... but I'm still confused. Who are you exactly?"

I sighed, "I'm Nazeka Mamori, lieutenant of the 13th Squad under Ukitake-taicho and therefore, Rukia is my subordinate, like I said."

"So you're on Renji's level?" Of course, compare me to Renji.

"Yeah. You could say that."

"And you were on our side?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Okay then. Well, thanks for being on our side then. I guess that makes you a friend as well."

"I think we officially ditched the formalities there. Anyway, I also wanted to say that I am highly impressed with your abilities. I think you'll make a great shinigami, even if you are human."

"Ah, Mamori-fukutaicho!"

I was interrupted by a member of my own squad, Daisuke, "Yes?"

"Ukitake-taicho is back at the barracks and wants to see you."

"Alright. I'll be there in a minute," I turned back to the ryouka-now-friends, "Are you going to be staying in Soul Society for a little while?"

"I suppose just until we recuperate," Ishida answered.

"Alright, then I'll talk to you guys later. See ya!"

*kosode= the black shirt they wear.


	17. Bai Bai

I slid open the door, not even bothering to knock or give any notion that I was there. Somehow, it didn't even phase him.

"Good morning," I said, shutting the door behind me.

"Yeah," he replied, his attention on the stack of papers in front of him.

"You happy I actually went through the door and not through the window this time?"

"Yeah."

I crashed on the couch in front of his desk and peered over the back, "Toushirou, are you just going to reply 'yeah' to everything I say? Because you know, that would never be a good idea."

He finally looked up, his turquoise eyes narrowed and his lips curled into a frown. I was obviously intruding on something important. But, like always, I didn't care. Yeah, I could be a jerk sometimes.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"Don't you have to be somewhere?" He set down the ink brush, leaned back in his chair and folded his arms.

"No. Why, do you?"

"Nazeka, I could sit here and play this little game of yours all day or I could finally get some work done."

"I like the first option." I grinned, "You never play games anymore."

"And I'm not about to start now. Why don't you go and bother someone else. Doesn't Ukitake need you to do something?" He returned to his work.

"Nah. Unlike you, everyone else in the Seireitei's taking a break and having some fun. The gang from the World of the Living is hanging out with us too. Apparently Ichigo's over at the dojo in Squad 11's barracks. I hope he understands how seriously they take it over there."

"And where exactly is Ukitake?"

"Out having a few drinks with Kyouraku. No point in going back to my barracks if my captain isn't even sober."

"Great, so you _are_ stuck with annoying me."

"Yeah, pretty much."

He was already back to focusing on the large spread of paperwork before him. I sat in silence, still staring at him from the couch. A few minutes later, he muttered, "Why are you being so quiet? Weren't you going to annoy me?"

"Well... I have to let you get back to focusing. Once you're immersed in the work, I'll start annoying you again and I'll get an even more amusing response."

He looked up, the same expression on his face. I swear, his face was going to freeze that way. "You treat this like a science."

"I have to spice it up somehow."

He set down the brush again and stood up, sighing, "Okay, what am I going to have to do to get you to leave?"

"Nothing, but what do I have to do in order to get you to give up on your paperwork?" I stared him down, hoping he'd go for that option instead.

"That's not going to happen."

I stood up and folded my arms, "Oh, c'mon, why won't you try to have a little fun?"

He sat down as if to prove his point. Two could play at that game. I sat on the edge of his desk and started pushing on the tall stack of papers nearest me with my index finger. He froze, "You wouldn't."

"Oh I would."

He groaned, "What do you want!"

"I want to know what you're hiding."

He raised an eyebrow, "Hiding?" I nodded, "Yes, hiding. You've been in a bad mood ever since you were released from the 4th squad's barracks. What's eating you?"

He looked down, "Nothing." Well that wasn't obvious. I pushed on the stack harder, and the paper began to teeter.

"I'm dead serious! Nothing's bothering me!"

"You always try to cover it up, Toushirou. But you and I both know there's something you don't want to tell me." I put my elbow on the stack and rested my head in my hand as I waited patiently for his answer.

"I visited Hinamori earlier."

"And...?"

"She hasn't improved."

"Give her a break, it's only been two days since Aizen..." I silenced myself when I saw him grimace at Aizen's name. He clenched his fist and slammed it on the desk, "That man is the reason she hasn't improved. She's lost the very reason she wanted to live, to become a shinigami, to do any of this! She's never going to wake up! I knew that from the moment I saw her the next day! She... she has no reason to live anymore. Now it's just a matter of time..." He put his head in his hands, frustrated with himself.

"She's..." I muttered, hating every word I let roll off my tongue, "She's got you, though."

He shook his head, "That's not good enough."

Ouch. Well that hurt. I kind of wondered if he would say that if I were in a coma too. Oh well, couldn't let this become all about me. "Sure it is. She's just got to realize it, that's all. But doesn't it feel better to actually tell someone?"

He looked up from his hands and snapped, "No."

"That's just like you. Look, you need to get out and do something to keep your mind off it. Why don't we go take a walk? Just around the Seireitei."

"No."

"Oh, c'mon. It'll be good for you!" I said cheerily, sliding off the desk to stand up. But then I heard a loud fluttering of papers behind me combined with a thud. I turned around slowly to see that very stack of papers spilled over on the floor... and a very furious Toushirou. I had accidentally hit the stack when I had gotten up. Oops.

He was fuming, speechlessly so. He just stared at the mess at his feet in disbelief, his mouth gaping as he tried to form words. I gave a sheepish grin and said softly, "I think now's a good time for that walk. Let's go." I grabbed his wrist and pulled him away, flash-stepping the heck out of there. The longer he stared at that pile, the longer my lecture would be.

We were still in his squad's barracks, just on the opposite side. He was still ticked, and I backed away slowly, "Look, it was just an accident, okay? I'll pick them up when we get back from our-"

"NAZEKA!" He roared, fists clenched by his sides. I hid behind him and pushed him toward the exit, "Now, now, just calm down... let's go on that walk like I suggested befo-"

"Nazeka, I've had it with you popping into my office and screwing things up! You're almost as bad as Matsumoto!" He snarled, folding his arms and planting his feet so I couldn't push him any farther. I waited for more, but he seemed to be done.

"Is that it? That's all you're going to tell me? Couldn't you think of anything else to add to that little 'scolding' of yours?"

"Believe me, I would, but I can't think of anything else. I'm so mad I can't see straight, let alone think straight!"

I began pushing him again, "Then let's go and cool you down. Forget about all that stuffy paperwork and get a life already!" He wouldn't budge, and I gave up on forcing him out.

"Even if I did want to go, I'm not wearing any shoes and that mess is still there."

"I told you, I'll take care of it when we get back. And I can handle that shoe thing. Be right back." I disappeared, flash-stepping to the entrance of his office. His sandals were beneath the door leading outside. Grabbing those, I went to where I had mine and then I finally went back to where he was waiting.

"Here," I tossed him his shoes while hopping on one foot to put mine on, "Now we can go!" I began pushing him again, and he reluctantly agreed. It seems his temper had gone down quite considerably, though it didn't seem like he wanted to talk. I rolled my eyes, "Why _do_ you have so much paperwork?"

"That's none of your business."

"I see... well, what do you think will happen now that we're out three captains?"

"They'll find replacements. Until then, the lieutenants will act as the leaders of the squad."

I thought about that for a second, "Man, poor Kira. He's not cut out to be a captain." Who else was missing a captain? Third squad, fifth squad, and... ninth squad. Hisagi should be fine, but... "Uh... who's going to take over for the fifth squad since Hinamori is...?"

Toushirou didn't answer. I assumed he didn't want to think about it, so I dropped the subject. This was more awkward than any other conversation I had had with him before. I put my hands behind my head as we turned down another street, when a girl with orange hair ran in between Toushirou and I in the opposite direction. I recognized her immediately.

"Uh, hey there, Orihime. Why in such a rush?" I called, walking backwards. She stopped and waved, "Oh, hey there Nazeka-san! You haven't seen Rukia anywhere have you?"

"No. Why, is there a problem?"

"Well I was going to give her a dress, but when I went into her hospital room, she wasn't there. Uh, shouldn't you be worried too? She's your subordinate isn't she?"

"Nah, I'm not worried. Rukia's tough. She can handle herself. It's a nice day, I'm sure she went out for a walk or something like we are. Are you the only one searching for her?"

"I was going to go find Ichigo to help."

"Ah. Oh, hey, you guys are leaving tomorrow, aren't you?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, well, I'll be sure to see you guys off then! See ya, Orihime. Good luck finding Rukia."

"Bye!" I waved and spun back around, putting my arms behind my head again. "One of the ryouka?" Toushirou asked.

"One of the new _World of the Living friends_," I emphasized, "That was Orihime."

"I see."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, nothing."

We kept walking, "So how's your shoulder?"

He shrugged, "It's fine. A little sore is all."

"At least that's all. It was pretty deep, wasn't it?"

"Yeah. Are you all healed up too?"

I raised an eyebrow, "What are you talking about? I barely did anything! I didn't have a single scratch on me-"

"What about from your bankai training? That's what I was asking about."

"Oh." He had stopped me from ranting, which at this point was probably a good thing. I was still a little sore about the whole not-doing-any-fighting. He continued, "I was just thinking... about the current situation with the captains and the need of replacements... you do know what one of the requirements is for becoming captain, right?"

"Yeah, you need to know bankai. What about it?" I looked at him blankly, but it slowly sinked in. Not many people know bankai. The only people that I knew other than myself who knew bankai was Renji and Ichigo... and Renji would probably decline and Ichigo wasn't even registered in a squad and was human.

"There's not going to be too many replacements, are there?"

"You seem to be forgetting one tiny little detail," he muttered.

"What?"

He sighed and stopped walking, looking down at the ground, "_You_ will be requested as a captain."

"What! No, no, no, no! I am _not_ going to be a captain. I never even wanted to be a shinigami, let alone a captain or lieutenant!"

"If the Soutaicho says so, you'll have no choice. And you aren't exactly on good terms with him, so I don't expect him to agree to your decline."

"But... but... but I don't... I'm happy in the thirteenth squad. I don't want to leave. Ukitake is an amazing captain and I love my squad."

"One minute you're saying you hate being a shinigami, the next you're saying you love it. Make up your mind already," Toushirou muttered, shaking his head.

"Well... I mean... it's different. I've lived with this squad before I even became a shinigami, and then when I became one and joined the same squad, it really became my family. I wouldn't trade this squad with any other squad in the world."

"It's good that you've seen your squad that way, but... don't you think you're being a bit selfish?" He asked, and we stopped walking. I looked around, and we were in front of my barracks. I hadn't even realized where we were going the entire time.

"Selfish?" I asked. That hadn't even occurred to me.

"I can understand not wanting to leave your squad, but they can handle themselves. The thirteenth squad still has a captain and two third-seats. They're fine. But look at some of these other squads. The fifth squad has neither a lieutenant or a captain, the third squad doesn't have a captain, and the ninth squad doesn't have a captain. These squads are in dire need of some sort of leadership. They _need_ a captain."

I looked down at my feet. I knew he was right. "I just... I'd rather have my orders come from Ukitake than Yamamoto-soutaicho. My reiatsu is puny compared to some of the captains and I couldn't even stand up to the soutaicho. I'm scared of some of the captains and I would have to get to know an entirely different squad. I already know all of the thirteenth squad and I don't want to have to learn everyone else's name on a squad I've never even been on."

"Just think of it as payment for doing practically nothing to help two days ago."

Ooh, okay, that was a low blow. I narrowed my eyes, "You wanna take that back?"

"Look, just think about it. But you know, the whole reason you were sent to the Shinigami Academy was to become a captain, remember? Yamamoto-soutaicho isn't going to take no for an answer. You have more potential than you think. If you think your reiatsu isn't that high now, then you'll just have to train some more. Maybe Ukitake has some ideas or some things for you to do. Talk to him. Anyway, I have to go." He folded his arms and disappeared, flash-stepping away before I had a chance to say goodbye. I sighed, looking up at the emblem of my squad on the gate beside me.

But then I wondered if he had forgotten about the papers that I was supposed to pick up. Whoops. I flash-stepped back to his barracks and threw my shoes off as I ran back into his office. He wasn't there. Maybe he had something else to do... but if he did, then he wouldn't have been so keen on doing his paperwork.

Trying to shake the curiosity from my mind, I began picking up the large stack that was still lying untouched. Halfway through it, I saw the change of squad numbers on the top of the pages. They were no longer for squad ten. They were squad five's. I glanced at a few of them, and they were mostly just report papers. _Why is he taking care of these? Shouldn't Hinamori be doing... oh. He must be taking care of them for her while she's in the hospital. No wonder he didn't want to stop working..._

I finished stacking all of the papers and took a stack of the fifth squad's. There were a lot of them left, not to mention the immense amount from his own squad. _He shouldn't be doing all of this by himself. Though... Matsumoto's not going to help him._ I continued to stare at the stack in my hands. I sighed, not exactly liking the idea that formed in my head. I had enough to do anyway, but... they didn't add up to anything like what he had.

"I can't believe I'm going to do this..." I muttered, tucking the stack underneath my arms and grabbing another stack that was for the fifth squad. I then found a blank piece of paper in his desk and wrote:

_If you really needed help, then you should've just said so. I took some of the Squad 5 papers. I'll take care of them. You have enough to deal with already. I'll give these to you as soon as they're done._

_ -Nazeka_

I left his office, put my shoes back on, and walked back to my barracks. It was late in the afternoon, and not many people were on the streets. The day had gone by quickly, and it seemed that the Seireitei was finally finding some peace after the last couple of days. Everyone had been on edge yesterday, even though the ryouka were now our friends. But now it seemed like everyone had gotten used to our visitors and things were settling down.

"Oi! Ichigo! Where the hell are you!"

The voice came so suddenly from behind that I nearly dropped all of the papers in my arms from shock. A large blur shoved me out of the way and I fell to the ground... all of the documents spilled in front of me. Just what was the deal with me and spilling paperwork all over the place! I stood up and yelled, "Hey! Who the hell do you think you-gah!" I stopped talking immediately as I realized that it was Kenpachi-taicho. Yachiru waved from his back and smiled, "Bye-bye Namo-chan!"

"Uh... Namo-chan?" I raised my eyebrow. At least it wasn't degrading this time. I waved half-heartedly back and watched as they turned a corner. I groaned when I looked down and saw the paperwork still in a large clutter. In frustration, I kicked some of the papers in front of me. I froze when I heard the sound of ripping, and slowly turned my gaze to the mess. Sure enough, some of them were now torn.

I began to panic, "No, no, no, no! Toushirou's going to be furious! He's going to kill me!" I scooped up the papers and made a break for it to my barracks.

* * *

The next day, I was to say good-bye to my new friends. I had barely gotten to know any of them, and here they were just leaving back to what used to be my home. I couldn't help but be a bit jealous. But, as it turned out, there were a few upsides in the day already.

First, I was one of the few that actually got to watch them leave thanks to me being Ukitake's lieutenant. Number two was that Rukia was staying with us. And three, it turned out that Ichigo would work for us as a substitute shinigami, so we could go visit him or vice-versa. At least it wasn't good-bye forever. Truth be told, I kind of wanted to use him as an excuse for more missions in the World of the Living. I hadn't been there in ages, and I really wanted to see what had changed.

We were allowing them to use the Senkaimon in order to return home. They all received Hell Butterflies as well; but Ichigo also received a combat pass, which would allow him to change into his shinigami form without using a gikongon pill, as well as alert him to Hollows. I thought it was pretty neat.

With Ukitake, Rukia, and I, there was Kuchiki-taicho, Komamura-taicho, Unohana-taicho, Renji, Sentaro, and Kiyone.

"It's time!" Ukitake said, and the Senkaimon glowed even brighter than before. Ichigo and his friends turned to leave, and approached the large entryway. I waved, "See ya, everyone! Come back again soon!"

They disappeared, and the Senkaimon deactivated, the large doors swinging shut. I looked at Rukia, who was still staring at the doors. She already missed them. Then I noticed the cloth in her hands and asked her, "What's that, Rukia?"

She glanced at it, as if double-checking that I was asking her about it, "Oh, this? Ishida made me this dress. Orihime told me I have to wear it... and she seemed pretty serious about it."

"Ishida made it?"

"Yeah, he's amazing at sewing."

"Oh, right, I remember you telling me that."

Ukitake motioned for us to follow him, and we ended our conversation there until we were in district 13 and closer to the barracks. "You gonna be okay?" I asked.

"Huh? Oh... yeah. It was my choice."

"Why'd you choose to stay?"

"Well... you see... I thought it would be best. I can't stay with them forever." She said, looking down at the dirt.

"That's true... but I'm sure we'll see them again real soon. Right?"

She looked up and smiled, "Yeah."

When we arrived at our barracks, I excused myself. I needed to talk to Ukitake in private. I found him in the office, staring at a stack of papers, puzzled. I asked him, "What's wrong?"

"How did some of the fifth squad's papers get mixed up with ours?"

I quickly picked them off the desk and set them on the floor, "Oh, that's nothing you need to worry about. Some things have happened while you've been sick."

He sat down at the desk and picked up a few papers and started reading them. "Um, Taicho..." I said, looking down at my feet, "I have a few questions."

"Okay." He set down the papers and folded his hands on the desk.

"Well... Toushirou and I were talking... and well, he mentioned that I might be possibly promoted to captain..."

"Nazeka, we've known about this possibility since you've arrived in Soul Society. It's why you became a shinigami, remember?"

_Believe me, Ukitake, I remember_. "Well, I know I've achieved bankai and everything but..." I told him everything I had told Toushirou. He was quiet for a little while, so I continued, "Well, I... I... I wanted to ask you if you had any ideas about my reiatsu problem. You know, like some sort of training or something..."

"I can help you with that, Nazeka. Why don't you find someone who will train with you?"

"Well, I would typically ask Rukia... but since she doesn't really have her powers right now..."

"Yo, Taicho... I've got a delivery for you." The door slid open and a man carrying a huge stack of paperwork that blocked his view walked in. He set it down by the desk and stood up, stretching his back, "Whew, all this commotion with those guys from the World of the Living and Aizen sure is causing a lot of paperwork." He shook his sleeves until they were covering his hands.

"Oh, good morning, Daisuke," Ukitake said, smiling. I was about to greet him as well, but then an idea came to my mind, "Hey, Daisuke, I have a favor to ask."

He looked at me, his same old bored look in his eyes, while he chewed on his toothpick, "What?"

"Would you help me with some training?"

"Training? Work? No thanks."

"C'mon, I really need this training. Please, Daisuke? I just need you to-"

"No."

"I guess you'll just have to take it as an order then, because as your lieutenant, I am ordering you to help me with my training."

"Oh, so you're pulling that card, are you? Tch..."

I turned to Ukitake, "So, now that I have a partner..."

"I'll meet you in the training grounds. Go on and get your zanpakutou, both of you."

I nodded and pushed Daisuke out the door, "C'mon, you, you're helping, now go get your sword." He shuffled along at an unimaginably slow pace. He was going to take forever.

"C'mon, let's _go_."

"If you don't take life slowly, you'll miss all the good things." He preached, and I rolled my eyes, "Now's not the time for proverbial sayings."

"But it's true."

"I don't care, now get your ass moving!" I kicked him forward, "When I get over to the training grounds, you'd better be over there with your zanpakutou ready to fight!" I departed to my own quarters, where Syugoryuu was lying against the wall inside the door. I attached him to my belt and took off for the training grounds.

Ukitake was already there, sitting on the grass-covered cliff above the bowl-like rocky ground that served as the 'arena' and sipping a cup of tea. I sat next to him, both of us waiting for Daisuke. Luckily, he wasn't taking his sweet time like usual and arrived fairly quickly.

Ukitake set down his tea, "Alright then... Nazeka, tell me, what exactly is it that you hope to accomplish by training?"

"Well an... an increase in my reiatsu I suppose."

"Do you know how that's accomplished?"

"Uh..." I scratched my head, "Isn't your full reiatsu supposed to become accessible once you learn bankai?"

"Typically, yes."

"Typically?"

Ukitake took another sip of his tea, "Your bankai was achieved through a different method. Therefore, your reiatsu will be achieved a different way as well. Have you ever used your bankai before?"

"No..."

"Then you have no idea your limits or that time limit you have, correct?"

"Uh..." I hadn't ever thought of that, "No..."

"Then that's what we'll focus on. You need to know how long you have until you lose control. Daisuke," he motioned towards the arena, "since you are Nazeka's partner, you will be fighting her until we know how long she can hold out. That's only step one, but we'll leave it at that for now. Go on, you two." He waved us to the dirt bowl and sipped his tea again.

I dropped down in the arena first, fingering the hilt of my blade anxiously. Daisuke, as always, didn't show any emotion other than pure boredom. We stood across from each other, a good few meters away. I drew my blade, but he just stood there, pulling on the strap that held his zanpakutou over his shoulder. He carried that thing around like a bag over his left shoulder.

I held out Syugoryuu in front of me, both hands on the hilt gripping it tightly. I was a little nervous. How long would I hold out? What would happen to me?

"BANKAI!"


	18. Looking Up?

"BANKAI!" I shouted, my reiatsu forcing up a flurry of dust and dirt that surrounded me. Within seconds, my bankai had transformed me and my sword was in its shikai. The debris began to settle around me; and even though I still couldn't see Daisuke, I prepared myself, holding onto my hilt tight.

The twisted tail formed from the ends of my lengthened hair swat away some of the dust. The metal crescent-shaped barbs on the ends of the whips dragged in the dirt, making soft tinkling sounds as they scraped together. There. His figure showed up in the dust. Without thinking, I lunged forward, raising my arm. I came upon him faster than even I was expecting. The speed was incredible. It was the speed of shunpo but only the work of jogging.

But because I wasn't used to the pace, I missed him completely; he didn't even so much as flinch. I was wide open, but he didn't make a move. So, I jumped back, moving to the side as to come at him from behind. As incredible as the speed was, it was hard to control where I was going. I would go farther than I wanted, or too fast to where I missed my target. And Syugoryuu wasn't even going to try to help teach me.

I whipped my arm across my body, the ropes extending from my zanpakutou hilt following fluidly, the metal barbs cutting into his left forearm. That seemed to wake him up. After tearing my shikai from his arm, he pulled his zanpakutou from off his back, drew it, and slung his sheath over his shoulder again.

"Wanna try that again?" He asked, fidgeting with the toothpick in his mouth. I pulled back the whips and smirked, "Why, didn't have enough? Well here, then, have some more!" I disappeared behind him, jumped up and hit him with a flying back kick. He went skidding across the dirt, rolling several times until he finally slowed down enough to stop himself.

Daisuke picked himself up, rubbing his head, "That was some kick. Guess that's a perk, right?" He asked, feeling his mouth for his toothpick. It was gone, and he looked pretty annoyed by that fact.

"Yeah, I guess it's a good thing. In my opinion there's more bad than good." I shrugged, and I noticed something red trickling down my left arm. It was blood. I pulled up my sleeve to find identical cuts that were on his arms. The only difference was that my sleeve was untouched. Again, a downside to my stupid zanpakutou.

But what surprised me was that the cuts didn't hurt at all. In fact, had they not bled, I'm sure I would have never noticed them. I remembered Syugoryuu saying that I would be able to withstand pain longer, but I had never imagined not being able to _feel_ some of the pain.

"I never laid a finger on ya. Why'dya got all that blood on ya?"

"Now if I answered all of your questions, you'd soon know all my zanpakutou's secre-gah! Ack!" I clutched my chest and bent over. The pain was insane. It spread through my whole body. I screamed, but as quickly as it had come over me, it left. My mind clouded over and I found myself unable to move my body. Instead, _it _moved _me_. I straightened up, wobbling as I did.

Then, it felt as if I was being swallowed up, some other force coming up from inside me to take my place. I was shoved back into the recesses of my mind, and watched in horror as my own raging subconscious took over.

My lips curled into a wicked smile, baring my fangs as I lunged forward, laughing maniacally. I lifted my right hand and swung downward, the whips finding their mark and catching Daisuke in the shoulder, tearing his flesh mercilessly. I could feel my own shoulder rip apart, but the pain was still numbed. I jumped in front of him and made a wide sweep for his face with my claws, but he dodged. He didn't get far enough away though, and I took a chunk out of his stomach, still laughing.

But that phase ended. My instincts seemed to switch gears, and my reiatsu spiked higher than ever. I struggled against the force that I myself produced, and a fierce growl erupted from my mouth. Daisuke was forced backward, hitting the dirt and rolling backwards a few times.

"Bakudo 62, Hyapporankan!"

In my frenzied state, I didn't recognize it at first, but as soon as one of the light rods struck the ground next to me, I jumped away, running every which way to avoid the kido. I turned around to see if they were over, but two jammed themselves through my stomach and left shoulder and pinned me into the dirt. I writhed and roared as I tried to get up, grabbing the rods and trying to pull them out. Ukitake appeared beside me.

With a howl, I crushed the rods and leapt to my feet. I lunged for my own captain, but he simply flash-stepped behind me, "Bakudo 61, Rikujokoro!" The beams jammed into my abdomen, and everything went black.

* * *

When I awoke, I was lying flat on my back, on the grassy cliff over the training grounds. My body hurt everywhere, most especially in my shoulder and my stomach. Ukitake and Daisuke were chatting nearby, smiling and laughing. My zanpakutou was back in its sheath. I could barely remember anything that had happened. My memory was foggy and full of blank spots. What had I done?

Daisuke looked back over in my direction, and when I grimaced from the pain, he waved, "Yo," another toothpick hanging out the corner of his mouth. Ukitake turned to my direction and smiled, "Ah, Nazeka, you're awake. How are you doing?"

"I hurt all over." I replied hoarsely.

"It seems your bankai takes a greater toll on you than we first thought. Unfortunately, it seems we're starting from square one with you. You barely lasted seven minutes. What do you remember?"

"Not much. It's kind of hazy." I attempted to sit up, but ended up staring at the sky from my back again when I went dizzy from pain. I was actually wishing that I was using my bankai so the pain would be numbed.

"That's not surprising."

"How long was I out?"

"About an hour."

I tried to sit up again, bracing myself for the excruciating throbbing in my shoulder and stomach. This time I succeeded.

"Are you ready to try again?"

I looked at Ukitake like he was insane, "What! Again! Are you crazy? I mean, I barely lasted seven minutes like you said and look what I did to Daisuke!" I motioned towards his stomach, "What else did I do?"

"Ya tried to attack da Cap'n." Daisuke said flatly. "See? That's why I can't use my bankai! I'll attack anyone! I could end up killing one of you!"

Ukitake glared at Daisuke, "Thanks. You really boosted her confidence."

"That's what I'm here for, sir." He dropped down into the arena.

"Nazeka, you're going to go into those training grounds and use your bankai. You can't keep fearing it. You need to control it. You understood that earlier, why can't you understand that now?" Ukitake said sternly. He had never been this way toward me before. I was taken aback by how angry he seemed.

"I-I... I just wish I had never learned my bankai."

"But you know what, Nazeka? You can't take it back so just face it already! It's a part of you and you need to accept that! It's like being afraid of your own shadow! Now act like the mature lieutenant you are and show me that you want to control it!"

I froze up, not able to say anything or move. He was calling me weak, a total coward, and I couldn't help but feel he was right. I stood up, fists clenched and body shaking. I was afraid. I was afraid of what I could do. But now wasn't the time for that. I had to own up to what I had started. I couldn't shy away from something this trivial. I had the power to control it, and I would prove it.

"Well, Nazeka?" Ukitake asked, taking another sip of his tea.

"Just be ready to use a binding spell." I said, sliding down the rocky side of the arena. I heard him call after me, "I just hope I won't have to use it."

I stood across from Daisuke, who was chewing on his toothpick impatiently. I drew Syugoryuu, my knuckles white from clenching the hilt so hard. I couldn't stop shaking; but I had to do this, even if my body hurt like hell.

Daisuke smirked, "Done cryin' like a baby?"

"Don't underestimate me, amateur." I spat. He laughed, "Gimme a break. Why don'cha go hide in yer room under yer covers?"

I held out my zanpakutou again, "Bankai!"

"Seems yer serious, ain'tcha?"

The cloud of dust surrounded me again. The pain was gone, my senses on edge. Yet somehow, I managed to let him get past my guard. "Boo," he muttered behind me, his blade against my neck. I grabbed the blade with my left hand and elbowed him in the stomach with my right. I let go and jumped away, bouncing every which direction to keep him from following.

This time, I wasn't going to approach cautiously. I was going all out. I was going to focus simply on fighting and hopefully suppress the insanity inside that way. I spun around in time to see him holding out his palm, "Hado 33, Sokatsui!"

It wasn't hard to dodge from the distance... at least, that's what I had thought. The blue fire rammed into my tail, and I yelped, slamming it into the dirt to crush the fire. He laughed, "Ya sounded like a little cat gettin' his tail trampled!"

"That stings, dammit!" I yelled, pointing two fingers at him, "Hado 4, Byakurai!" The blue lightning shot through the air and hit him square in the chest. He fell back onto the dirt, "What, is this gonna end up a battle of kido er somethin'?" He moaned from the ground.

I switched my zanpakutou from its shikai into its sealed form and lunged for him. He managed to jump back on his feet just in time and countered, our blades hitting hard with a loud clang. I backed off, only to strike again, coming in from the right. He parried yet again, so I pushed his sword down and high kicked him from the right as well. I hit his head, knocking down onto his side.

He held up his blade in preparation for another attack, but I stepped on his hand. "Hado, 54, Haie-" I went rigid, unable to finish the spell. He pushed me off his hand and knocked me over. I lay there motionless, my eyes wide. Then, slowly, my mouth began to open and I screamed. My time in control was done.

I began writhing on the ground, my claws digging into the earth as my subconscious took over again. Daisuke stood over me. I was there, then gone. I was behind him, my leg already rotating around to kick him in the head again. He held up his hand and took the blow, skidding in the dirt.

I tried to stop, I really did, but the more I struggled in my mind, the more I seemed to be pulled back. My body was on its own again. I began laughing uncontrollably again. My subconscious thought this was _fun_. I whirled around to see Ukitake already standing behind me, "Bakudo 61, Rikujoko-" He didn't have time to finish. I lunged at him, grinning madly. He avoided me, but just barely. My claws left only a single line on his cheek.

He spun around and repeated himself, "Bakudo 61, Rikujokoro!" This time, he finished, and the six rods jammed into my stomach. I was still awake though, despite my inability to move. He approached me cautiously, afraid I might wiggle my way out of that kido like I did with Hyapporankan. But there was no way out this time. I was completely immobile; even so, I kept snarling.

He pried my sword from my hand and tossed it away. Immediately, I was sane again, my bankai unable to stay without my zanpakutou in my hand. Ukitake released me from the kido, and I fell to my knees, panting. "H-How did I do?" I asked, curious about the time. I needed some sort of good news.

"Ten minutes."

"Really?"

He paused before answering again, "Yes." I couldn't help but wonder if he was lying to me, but I just wanted to hear some good news. I laid back, spread eagle on the dirt and sighed, "I think I'm done for the day."

"I think you are too. We ought to get you to the fourth squad." Ukitake said, smiling. Daisuke frowned, "Oi, what 'bout me?" He pulled out another toothpick, as he had lost the other one earlier.

"Yes, yes, you too, Daisuke." It seemed Ukitake was in a good mood again. I was just happy that I seemed to have lengthened the time, even if it was ten minutes. If I could do that a few times a week for a month, I was sure that I could lengthen the time significantly. Things were starting to look up.

* * *

"Ow, ow, ow, ow!" I shrieked, clutching the bedsheets in order to keep me from squirming so much. "Mamori-fukutaicho, I'll be done in a minute. You need to keep still!" The nurse said sternly, peeling off the bandages on my shoulder. They were glued to my skin and they pulled at every nerve when they were being torn off.

In a few more minutes, the bandages were off, and she was pressing a cold wet rag to the tender wound. I'd been there for two weeks, and the days seemed to be growing longer and longer. I wanted out, and I wanted it_ now_.

"How much longer?" I asked, and the nurse replied, "Well, I still have to take care of the one on your hand and the bandages on your stomach, but after that I should be finished."

I sighed, "No, I meant, how much longer until I can leave?"

"You should be out by tomorrow morning. They're healing rather quickly thanks the healing kido, and if you stay in bed and rest, you should be up and ready to go no problem."

"That's a relief."

She put a new set of bandages on my shoulder and moved to my hand. Since there were less bandages, it didn't hurt as much. Thankfully, the cut was mostly healed up, so she didn't put any new bandages on. Then, came the most painful part: my stomach. It was pretty much a rerun of my shoulder. But after half an hour of washing the wound a little, she put fresh bandages on and got up to leave.

"Thank you," I said.

"It's no problem at all. Call me if you need anything else, Fukutaicho." She opened the door to leave. Waiting to come inside was Ukitake, who looked grim. The nurse moved out the way and let him come in, closing the door behind him as she left.

"What's the matter, Captain?" I asked. He took a deep breath, "I'm afraid I have some bad news for you."

I hesitated, panicking inside, "Yes?"

"Take a look at this." He handed me a document that was signed specifically for captains.

_At the moment, Squads 3, 5, and 9 are lacking captains. With the hovering threat of Aizen and his associates, we cannot leave this position unfilled. Therefore, I, Yamamoto, and two other captains have discussed the capabilities of a possible candidate: Nazeka Mamori, current lieutenant of the 13th Squad. As it was the understanding that she would become a shinigami in order to become captain under my decision, as well as one of the few who know bankai, she has been selected as the new captain for a squad. The placement has not yet been determined, but will be announced on Wednesday at the Captain's Meeting._

It continued on, but I couldn't read anymore. The words became fuzzy and the paper dropped from my hands. Only one thing could come from my mouth, "Who told?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know? I only told you and Toushirou!"

"Daisuke knew about it, and I'm sure that some people who recognized your spiritual pressure figured it out when you were training."

"Two captains... who were they?"

"I don't know. It's specifically kept anonymous to avoid biased decisions."

"But it's already biased! Yamamoto-soutaicho wanted me to become captain the moment I got here! I don't understand what he sees in me!"

"But apparently, he's not the only one. The decision was unanimous. The two anonymous captains both decided that you were the best option, and therefore as it is the Soutaicho's command that you become captain, you have no say in the matter."

"This isn't fair! I can't believe they just pulled this on me two days before!"

"At least they're giving you a chance to get ready. You can pack up and say good-bye tomorrow. But it's not like you're entirely leaving. You'll be able to visit, you're still in the same city and we'll both be captains."

I couldn't argue with that logic. But still, I was ticked off at Yamamoto-soutaicho. The nerve of him to just make the decision without informing me. I sighed, "Guess I'd better prepare what to say in front of all of you. Gotta make it look like I appreciate the promotion, huh?"

"I'll let you think on that," he picked up the paper, "Looks like I'll be out one lieutenant for a while."

"You'll be fine. You've got two third seats after all!"

"That's true. I'll see you tomorrow then, Nazeka."

So much for things starting to look up.

* * *

The next afternoon, I stood in front of the entire thirteenth squad, nervous, my stomach not right, and absolutely upset. I didn't want to do this. Sure, Ukitake was right about what he had said earlier. I was going to still see everyone. But the fact that I was leaving... It was like going from a foster home to another one. A whole new family with a whole new personality. I had grown up in the Soul Society with this squad.

"Ahem... Uh... I know you guys have heard the announcement. I'm going to become a new captain. I still don't know which squad yet, but that's going to be announced tomorrow. Um... well, I'm going to miss you all. I've lived here my entire Soul Society life and you guys are like my family. I'm sad to be going. If I had a choice, I would've stayed your lieutenant for the rest of my life. It's not like I'll be leaving you guys forever. I'll see all of you around and I'll still visit from time to time. Just... wish me luck, guys. I'm not sure what I'm expecting yet, so it'll definitely be an adventure. But, uh, yeah, wish me luck everyone!"

I sat down next to Ukitake, who raised his glass, "A toast for Nazeka, that she'll have a wonderful squad like our own!" Everyone drank from their sake cups and I did as well, smiling. I couldn't help it. It was nice of them to have this little party for me.

Everyone was having a good time. I was lucky to have been a part of this squad at all. A nice meal, a few drinks, pleasurable company, and all were happy. It was simpler than I could've imagined. I just hoped that my new squad would be like this.

"_I'm sure you'll be fine. Besides, Yamamoto will stay off your back now that you're a captain, so things may just go smoother from now on."_

_Well, look who decided to show up after two weeks. You've been rather quiet lately._

"_I've had nothing to say."_

_That's rare._

"_You wore me out though, using bankai two times in a day... I'm rusty, you've gotta give me a break!"_

_You're _rusty_? Please, you're a zanpakutou. You've gotta be kidding me._

"_Why do you think it starts out so low? You've gotta give me a few tries before the limit goes up. A few more practices and you might be up to an hour."_

_And why didn't you let me know of this sooner!_

"_...I figured I'd get this sort of reaction."_

_You're impossible._

"_Baby steps, Nazeka, baby steps."_

_Oh, just shut up._

A few hours later, the party disbanded and I said good-bye to everyone one final time. I returned to my room and packed everything but my bed and clothes for the next day. There wasn't much, and I was appreciative of my acquired ability to keep things relatively clean in my room. It had certainly been different when I was alive.

I didn't sleep well at all. I was still nervous, frustrated, and upset. The hours were long, and I slept maybe three hours. I was just hoping I didn't look too tired for the Captain's Meeting.

I walked to the first squad's barracks- to the meeting room. The captains were already in the room, and the doors were shut. Lieutenant Sasakibe was waiting by the doors for me, "Ah, Mamori-fukutai-oh, sorry, I mean Mamori-taicho, I have a few instructions. When you are called in, I have here your haori. You will trade in your lieutenant badge for it when Yamamoto-soutaicho officially announces your squad and your position as Captain."

"Oh, ah... thank you, uh... Sasakibe-san," I stuttered, my nerves on overload. The nervousness from earlier had turned to a restlessness. I couldn't wait any longer. I just had to get it over with.

I heard through the doors, "Nazeka Mamori, enter!" I took that as my cue, and Sasakibe opened the doors. I walked in and felt ten pairs of eyes boring into me. I couldn't take it. I wasn't ready for this. I could barely stand in front of them, let alone_ be_ one of them. I kneeled down in respect and bowed my head, an automatic response.

"Get up, Mamori. Today you are being promoted to captain, therefore you should respect and demand respect. Turn in your lieutenant badge and take your place among us." Yamamoto-soutaicho commanded, and I immediately felt like I had done something wrong by kneeling. I untied my lieutenant badge from my arm and handed it to Sasakibe. He in turn held out my haori, and I glanced at the number on its back before I put it on. It was sleeveless, like many of them.

"I now introduce the new Squad Nine Captain, Nazeka Mamori."

There was silence, and I realized that they were expecting me to say something. My face must have been blood red, and I couldn't bare to look at anyone. I stammered, "Uh, thank you very much. I'm very honored," that was a total lie, "Since I don't know exactly what to expect and because this was such short notice, I please ask for your advice. I hope to get to know all of you."

There was again, silence, but I was given a place to stand: in between Komamura-taicho and Kenpachi-taicho... not exactly the most convenient place... or friendliest. A few more minor announcements that made absolutely no sense to me were made (I assumed I would find out what they meant later), and then the meeting was over. We were dismissed. I felt the tension lift just a little as fellow captains left one by one.

Ukitake approached me, a huge smiled on his face, "Congrats, Nazeka, you did it. That wasn't so bad, now, was it?"

I rolled my eyes and sighed, "You've got to be kidding me. Those were the scariest moments of my life! I've never been that nervous or had that much pressure on me before!"

He laughed, "Well it's over and done with now."

"Yeah."

"Oi, Nazeka," Toushirou was standing next to Ukitake. I waited for him to say something. "...Yes?" I asked. He waited a little longer, then replied, "...I told you so."

I hit him on the head, "I went through all that and that's all you have to say to me! You haven't talked to me once for two weeks and that's the first thing that comes out of your mouth!"

"Easy there," He rubbed his head, "What am I supposed to say? Your whole speech was forced, it's obvious you don't want to be here. Am I supposed to say congratulations or do you want me to say something else?"

"_...He has a point..."_

_Drop it, Syugoryuu._

"...Never mind then, don't say anything if you don't want to. I'm still a little on edge. I mean, I still have to face another obstacle."

"Your new squad, I know."

"My, my, the little Nazeka's growing up, now, is she?" Kyouraku wandered over to our little group, tipping his hat a little, "But it seems she's not quite ready for the responsibility herself."

I frowned, "Jeez, was my speech that bad?" _Little?_

Ukitake patted my shoulder, "Don't worry about it, it's a lot of pressure. No one's going to judge you off of what you said back there anyway. But you shouldn't keep your squad waiting. I'm sure they're eager to meet you."

"Right," I nodded and passed by them, waving, "See you guys later!"

"Eh? Oh, wait, Nazeka!"

I turned around, and Kyouraku smiled, "Why don't we all go out for a little drink later? You know, for a celebration!" He turned to Toushirou, "You're invited too, Toushirou-kun."

I smiled, "Sure. Why not?" Waved once more and left to go meet my new squad.


End file.
